I watched a television show tonight which featured nudity and sexual activity. I looked away, well, fought the urge to just stare (like I would do in the past), but did see some provocative imagery. I definitely did not fully indulge in the explicit scenes. However, I did not close my eyes completely, and, more importantly, did not turn off the show all together. Basically, it was a struggle, a give and take.

I did not watch this show in anyway with the intent to view nudity, gratify myself to it, or circumvent my defenses by letting myself slip (i.e., trick myself into opening up a Pandora's box of bad activities). I really, really did not want to see nudity, and was actually angry and disappointed when it showed up. I've just become hooked on the story, and legitimately wanted to see what happened in today's episode. However, this show is known to feature nudity. I knew it was a distinct possibility that I would see sex, etc., and I watched the show anyway. (I realize that television like this represents a potential trigger, and should be avoided.)

My question is, sincerely: Should I count this as a fall, or a slip, or neither? I am fine setting my 90-day count back to 0, but at the same time, don't want to be too strict and debilitating with myself. I should have avoided the show, but I see that more as "fencing" mistake.

Thanks Again!

I don't know if you should reset.... I do know that recovery about making progress (not being perfect). So be good to yourself, thank G-d for helping you to be able to identify your tendencies towards lust and the desire to want to turn away from them instead of wanting to indulge them, that is progress! You have helped me in what you have said also, so thank you!

I would count it as a slip but what difference does it make? Just forget about it and move forward!!

But really, stay away from movies and tv (see my avatar ) If you can't help yourself than perhaps try a neder. It really helped me. But common why should we watch movies and TV? What pleasures is it really giving us? Its really is just to please the masses who cant seem to please themselves. ("opium of the masse" hehe take that Karl Marx!)

I agree with dms1234, just keep on going. make a decision, fall or not, and take your lesson from the fall/slip that it shouldn't happen again.

how will you stop yourself from watching? I know it's not easy, as I don't have TV but I'm still always looking for ways to watch movies on line, I can only imagine how much more difficult when you have the TV right there just waiting to be turned on.

So what's the plan?

I think it is a slip, I am full of these kind of slips. But the main thing is, that you talk about it. That is the right step, I think.

Don't feel bad about it and just admit that you have a problem, accept it. These shows are defintely a thing i can't control.

Thanks, guys! Yeah, I'm thinking it's a slip too, as it's very different than my usual bad behavior. And I totally agree about the TV and movies being a problem.

Yes, since you didn't actively search for the nudity its a slip, I also find it hard to give up the TV, movies and shows. I have searched for clips of trailers and that has led to a full blown fall. This has happened on at least two occasions so I also need a strategy to fight these urges.

P,S love your picture, TalmidChaim which yeshiva is it?

Thanks, Israel. It's the Volozhin I think.

TalmidChaim wrote:


CONFIRMED! It is the Volozhin Yeshiva.
see source photo here: upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/f7/Volozhin_yeshiva.jpg

Such a modest, unassuming building. It's amazing.

So you're a Talmid of Rav Chaim?

I own a copy of Nefesh HaChaim, and would love to be fluent in its wisdom one day. I identify most with that hashkafah. But, I'm nowhere near anything remotely close to that level of Torah proficiency. So, a talmid? No(t yet). A fan? (Can I say that? ) Yes, absolutely.

Take a look at what passes for "plots" in TV, movies and shows. Then ask yourself whether TV, movies and shows are worth the risk, especially since the ratings are very watered down to the point of being almost nonexistent-since the networks and free cable compete with pay cable for viewers.

I totally agree, SIB. They're in no way worth falling off a clean-streak.

TalmidChaim wrote:


So then all you need to know is:

ס'איז דאך אללעס הבל הבלים

אין עוד מלבדו