LM it does sound like you have some kind of personality disorder to be frank. That is good that you are trying to figure out what it is and to deal with it. I know that the more I try to sweep my problems under the rug, the bigger the dust bump under the rug gets *cough.... and though I may try to continue on as if *wheeeeeeze nothing is wrong. In reality I am choking on my own issues *gasssssssp. Facing them and sizing them up for what they are honestly- is a breath of fresh air. 

OTR wrote on 18 Jul 2016 02:40:

OTR -with all due respect, I would steer clear of diagnostic terms such as "personality disorder."

All of us here have various issues, some the result of our addiction/struggle, others totally unrelated thereto.

LM --- Keep on coming back.

Frankly otr isnt far off ....i wont go into specifics but ....its a large part of perhaps how i got to the life situation i am in now ......not meaning there is an ongoinh situation i just mean my general life ....i spent years being treated ....not for my own wellbeing but more for other peoples ease of feeling ....not that i was soo difficult ...but why take chances when you can medicate away .....medicine at a young age permanently changes the grey matter in the brain ....i may never know what my birth personality was like ......anyway nu, this is what it ia and גם זו לטובה ....and even my falls have taught me soo much .....i still have soo much to accomlish .....but each level or day or accurance gets me closer to the answers i need and the treatment i need 

Whatever.

I just meant that its not our call to throw out such terms.

You are who you are today because of your life experience, including medications. Each of us, with our own personal warts and pekelach can grow.

Glad to help in any way possible.

E

wow, that's amazing stuff laughingman! keep up the good work

Today insaw a psychiatrist ....i started talking about my anxiety and deppression 
..but i cant talk about my sexual problems with a pill dispenser guy ....i think i need a therapist for that ...and someone versed in therapies having to do with people experiencing sexual and marital problems .....i just dont know where to turn to here .....

 

Obviously no one can tell you with whom you will feel comfortable discussing your sexual issues.

OTOH, I find it surprising to view a psychiatrist as a "pill pusher."

I look at such people as no less mental health professionals than therapists.

But its your call. 

If you're looking for a referral, I'm sure that there is where to turn.

Don't take this the wrong way, but often when I say something similar ("I can't talk to this one..." "I don't feel comfortable with X, Y, or Z") I am making an excuse not to do something beneficial. Also, will the psychiatrist be able to make the proper call on treatment without knowing about some core issues such as these going on in your life?

I am just writing these lines because, for some reason, I feel your pain.

Finding the right therapist could be tricky, but it's good advice not to be too selective.  Also, looking at the first visit as a consult might not be a bad idea - maybe one therapist won't have the expertise you want, but can help you find another.  Just a thought

Soo ......my father in law passed away .. ..and i am the only capable adult in my family now .....my entire immediate family .....my wife is sick...my parents are in a nursing home ...my mother in law is older...my kids are my kids ....i have aome friends sure ...but its still very stressful ...

I have been trying to help my wife feel that i am there with her in her time of need ...i hope i am helping enough ....i get tired easily now ....i was given zoloft by my doctor ....hopefully this will help...

BD"E. May Hashem give you the strength, patience and serenity to fulfill all your responsibilities.

laughingman wrote on 25 Jul 2016 15:51:

You kind of slipped that one in under the radar. Congratulations for you for taking that step and going to talk to someone. It's funny because I have someone in my faily who also see's a psychiatrist, they are pretty good and recognized a lot of the issues this person is dealing with. The doctor suggested that in conjuction with the medication he was giving, this person needed to also work through the issues with a social worker. And this proved to be completely true. LM keep looking for your 'cure' and trying different things. Kol hakavod to you for taking this important step and thank you for sharing it with us. 

Wow that sounds super tough.

I will bli neder have you in mind by davening.

Stay strong.

Soo i have had quite the last few weeks ....my wife and i are doing much better i think ...she trusts me more now i think ...i have been feeling alittle better with my new medicine ....i am also taking things very slowly and trying not to give in to anxiety which is easier to deal with with my medicine....i am in the middle of helping my mother in law with different things ....i have alot on my plate but i trust Hashem more today 

Laughingman,

It sounds like you've really made some great strides and are doing really much better. Kol hakavod to you!

I have been soo busy ....my plate of things to do piles up all the time ....i have become a caretaker of approx. 8 ppl not all of whom are children...i am not recognized as such officially ...as far as the surrounding kehillah is concerned we are a normal family that just had a tragedy ...but sometimes the bubbles of our difficulties surfaces ....i try to do my best to keep things going as much as normal as possible ...i see more the fantasticness of each day that i get something done ...that i am able to help even if its not perfect and never will be...