that's a good point, and at the same time, you can PLAN before entering the bathroom to keep the visit to 3 minutes. You will not even begin to surf. no phones or laptops in the be"hak!

plan is not a 4 letter word?

sorry,
Of course it is dependent on how practical and doable and concrete it is
and many other variables.

Pidaini wrote:


and on the same note

Pidaini wrote:


and put simply

Pidaini wrote:


I'm in absolute awe of myself

I made the TaPHSiK again, just this time much more seriously, with much more thought put into it.

I was nishbah B'shem that until Rosh Chodesh Nissan תשע"ד If I will disable the filter that I have on my computer or use the loophole that I found in the filter without
A) first calling someone who knows about my lust issues, telling them what I want to do, and being on the phone with them for 5 min, and if that is not available then
1) without saying one of the 5 seforim of tehillim, or
2) posting on GYE what I am about to do
within 15 of disabling the filter or using the loophole then I will have to give 300 Shekel to GYE and take a cold shower the next morning in mikvah.

If I do do those things and still disable the filter or use the loophole (regardless of whether I fall or not) I will either say any 10 kapitlach of tehillim or give 50 shekel to GYE.

This is only if the filter is working, but if it is not working then this is not in effect.

If I have to do the normal knas three times or the bigger knas once before Rosh chodesh then the neder is over.

Pidaini wrote:


This part's too easy when you're in EY.

It will be a much more effective neder when you get to England

Pidaini wrote:

That's from the Klei Yakar, btw.

And a gutte voch everyall!!

he's also medayek there that venimasem is w/o an alef

when one is not with the alufo shel oilam then venitmasem bam
when one properly surrenders control to Hashem, Hashem saves him from tumah

10 points for TaPHSiK (as of this post that is)!!!

I am dealing with a big dose of "imaginative" pride slashing, "thinking" that I am losing the respect of one of the people that I would want the most to respect me (even though I don't really know that for sure, but it adds to the drama of life, so why not feed it).

So obviously the first thing that came to mind was "well, if you don't respect me anyway, let me go have fun and watch porn and masturbate!!" But the thought of "You're not staying clean for anyone else, only for yourself" got a big boost from the TaPHSiK, I had to start looking for ways to figure how to fall if it actually came to that point.

Neh, not even to slip, I have a better life to live than that. Pain is uncomfortable (especially imaginative pain), and I won't die from being uncomfortable. Lusting is not living, living in pain is better than not living at all.

Thank you all for your support, One day at a Time!!

So yesterday there was this big fight between me and me.

I was in a terrible mood in the afternoon, due to the chance of loss of respect/reputation. me was saying, "what's the problem, what's wrong with being seen as the human being that your really are? Why do......" but me didn't let me finish and answered back with desperation "but what about me? you're gonna go and just let me thrown away?! :mad: I've been with you for so long, pushed you to do such great things, and this is what I get?!?!

and after me let me finish his raving (me has very good manners, won't interrupt anyone), which took quite some time, he answered again very simply "but you never really existed in the first place!! you are just a figment of the imagination!!"

Well, me couldn't take that sitting down, and put up quite the fight. After talking to a good friend, and admitting that I was brooding in order to protect me when I could really just be happy and accept the just fine reality of me, I was able to take a kicking and screaming me and give him as a present to Hashem, who is the rightful owner of me!!

to be cont.

Thats so random. Are you bipolar?? ahahaha.

Maybe you should stop thinking in the me form, either me that is. Its too selfish of you. Nor I or myself.

How about something else?

dms1234 wrote:


Yankel thinks that he'll start thinking in third person.....

Pidaini wrote:


Well me was very happy that he had such a victory, and slowly he started thinking more of himself, he felt like he was flying and in control....and he started growing....me.....me.....me…..

I came home last night after quite a nice day, and instead of just going to sleep as I should have I started (for the first time since last fall) looking for [yet another] way to get past the filter that wasn't included in my TaPHSiK…..why? you may ask, answer is simple

I DON"T KNOW!!!

But I found that way, and noticed very quickly where this was all headed, so since my wife was about to enter the room anyway, I shut the computer and got ready for bed. I fantasized a tiny bit in bed before reminding myself that if I continue this it won't end up good (and this itself isn't good either, but it will get much worse), Bh I fell asleep.

When I woke up I was craving, craving to use the brand new sliphole, but BH someone started chatting with me.

I then remembered that I had forgotten, forgotten to be honest, to be truthful with myself as to who's victory it really was, after all I really am just me and it is Hashem who took away the problems, and is helping me live correctly.

So I told Him "thank you, for taking away my bloated self image and need for respect, and for showing me that I am fine being just me!!"

I had actually started thanking Hashem in English for specific small things, especially things that I could take credit for if I really wanted to, on Shabbos, but I guess I was too busy enjoying the fact that I was free of me to acknowledge who had done that massive favor for me.

It's now onward, a little person trying to do the best he can, just another dude on the bus asking the driver for help.......the wheels on the bus go round and round.....

Just a friendly reminder from your local reputable kashrus authority
Pidaini wrote:

These should be checked for bugs. They have a tendency to be kinda seedy inside.

Me thinks that you should get rid of the damn filter; this way you won't be so damn proud that you bested it in the first place.

Me thinks that you are not a sex addict or a lustaholic, or maybe you are, but you are recoverin'.
Me thinks that perhaps it has somethin' to do with that ego and pride that you keep talkin' about.

And now for a doozie...me not sure if this is gonna make any sense....but me gonna try anyway....me thinks that you are scared or even petrified of fully recoverin', for then, you will need to look at your past as some type of failure, and that will not fit with the big @#$%in' ME, so instead me will keep slippin' and slidin' and perhaps even fallin' every once in a while, for this way ME can blame it on somethin' else.

And please forgive me....the only thin' I wanna accomplish is to get you to think.

b'hatzlachah

OMG
Zat you?!

Cuz it sounds suspiciously like the shvigger...