Here is the GYE version of Katy Perry's "Roar"- Not that I know who Katy Perry is, or what she looks like or sounds like ch"v, just thinking that if she would have a song named "Roar"- these would be good lyrics.

I've been around the block too many times
Sprawled on the ground flew in the skies
Yet I sat quietly, pretended politely
Exasperation was my friend
Forget, type, then hit send
Get hyped for nothing, losing and lusting

I pushed me down, you pulled me up
Care for nobody, but my next cup
Sipped a bit, sipped a lot
Before long I was a swaggering sot
I pushed me down, you pulled me up
Get ready 'cuz I've had enough
I've seen it all, I'm cleanin' now

'Cuz I've got the eye of a shomer, a fighter, tightropin' on a wire
'Cuz you are my champion, and you're gonna help me soooooooar
Strong like a lion, Cuz you are my champion, and you're gonna help me SOOOOOOOAR
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
You're gonna help me soarrrrr

Now I'm slippin' like a banna-peel
I don't wanna hurt or feel
I was a hero, think I am zero

I pushed me down, you pulled me up
Get ready 'cuz I've had enough
I've seen it all, I'm cleanin' now

'Cuz I've got the eye of a shomer, a fighter, tightropin' on a wire
'Cuz you are my champion, and you're gonna help me soooooooar
Strong like a lion, Cuz you are my champion, and you're gonna help me SOOOOOOOAR
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
You're gonna help me soarrrrr
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
Help me sooooar!
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
You're gonna help me soarrrrr

Soaaar soar soar soar SOOOOOOOOOOARRRRRRR

I've got the eye of a shomer, a fighter, tightropin' on a wire
'Cuz you are my champion, and you're gonna help me soooooooar
OH YEAH
Strong like a lion, Cuz you are my champion, and you're gonna help me SOOOOOOOAR
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
You're gonna help me soarrrrr
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
You're gonna help me soarrrrr

One of the classic songs from the late 1960s or early 1970s ( I am dating myself!) is Led Zepellin's "Stairway to Heaven". If anyone here knows the lyrics, they should post them without any changes. The lyrics might just inspire us in a way that the authors of that song never intended !

tehillimzugger wrote:


That's where I got my avatar from!!

Nice work TZ!

Hey TZ. I know what it feels like to have tried and tried and tried (etc.......) and feel like you haven't gotten anywhere. Actually, I only know what that feels like for me. And for me, it feels like Ropshytz (sorry). So if that's how you feel, please take this as a hug and a l'chayim from one yid to another.

Just finished reading your whole tread. I laughed and cried. I wanted to strangle and then hug you. It sounds much like my experience in this struggle except it seems like yours is much more clever and entertaining. Wanna switch? (just kidding)

Here's something that helps me: Look at today. Living in the moment isn't a choice I/we have. Its something that IS as a principle of reality. I already live in the moment and only in the moment. Instead of it being a tool or a trick to help in managing my/our addiction, maybe its simply a truth of existence. I have only today, this moment. EVERYTHING else is not what Hashem wants from me.

Keep searching for what works. I'm struggling with this for about 14 years and no end in sight. All I know is that Hashem wants me to forge a relationship with Him in and through whatever context He places me in - each and every moment anew - irrespective of what came before it and regardless of what may come thereafter.

SIB101854 wrote:


"Stairway To Heaven"


There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold
And she's buying a stairway to heaven.
When she gets there she knows, if the stores are all closed
With a word she cant get what she came for.
Ooh, ooh, and she's buying a stairway to heaven.

There's a sign on the wall but she wants to be sure
'Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
In a tree by the brook, there's a songbird who sings,
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven.

Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it makes me wonder.

There's a feeling I get when I look to the west,
And my spirit is crying for leaving.
In my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees,
And the voices of those who stand looking.

Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it really makes me wonder.

And it's whispered that soon, if we all call the tune,
Then the piper will lead us to reason.
And a new day will dawn for those who stand long,
And the forests will echo with laughter.

If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed now,
It's just a spring clean for the May queen.
Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run
There's still time to change the road you're on.
And it makes me wonder.

Your head is humming and it won't go, in case you don't know,
The piper's calling you to join him,
Dear lady, can you hear the wind blow, and did you know
Your stairway lies on the whispering wind?

And as we wind on down the road
Our shadows taller than our soul.
There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show
How everything still turns to gold.
And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last.
When we all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll.

And she's buying the stairway to heaven.

Tz

We are all with you

Shifchi kamayim libeich
Hodu LaHashem ki tov
V'hu kichasan
Ein od milvado
Rachem bichesdecha

MendelZ wrote:

Thanks for the compliment! You just read through the whole thing!? WOW! [Yesterday I saw a picture of you, you see I was actually looking for pictures of "Malki" but you were also at the wedding you know, gee this is sooooooooo embarrassing.]

Avreml wrote:


OOHH kumzitz?

Dear TZ,

Just to let you know, we're all in the same boat. Actually it's like Noach's boat. Sometimes we are on the top floor with the human beings. Sometimes we go down 1 floor and we act like the animals. And sometimes that's not enough, so we go down another floor and wallow in the cesspool. So I guess our goal is to try staying upstairs as much as possible.

Bedidi hava ivda! I had this paper in my pocket all year with a personal calendar going from Rosh Chodesh Cheshvan 5773 to R"C Cheshvan 4774. I had made some vows to keep me at a safe distance during this period. B"H things went pretty good. Some slips here and there, and one fall that costed me $400. Anyhow, I was sitting and learning on the first night of R"C Cheshvan (this past Thursday night) when it dawned on me that my vows have expired. Being a great Talmid Chacham (too smart for my own good) I confirmed in Yoreh De'ah that when one makes a neder until Rosh Chodesh of a certain month, and R"C has 2 days, it expires on the first day of R"C. So first I said to myself, "I better renew my vows, or I'll be in trouble". But then I "rationalized" that it is better for my recovery to try and continue behaving without any vows. Well it worked for one day. The next night, I was learning geshmak, and couldn't wait to go to bed and "maybe just let a little bit loose - nothing major". Well, the good news (if I can call it that) is that I did not go "all the way", but the bad news is that my night activities were nothing to be proud of.

B"H I did not let it get to me. The next day I reactivated all my vows for another year, and I hope that be'ezrat Hashem, this year will be as good or even better than last year.

And hopefully I will remember the lesson I was taught. Don't ever drop your guard, cuz next thing you know, you may drop your pants...

Hatzlacha

MT

tz, how about a nice long post, with lots of footnotes and mareh mekomos? with quotes from the kohen gadol, alice and winnie

I like the idea. If I wouldn't be in the middle of prepping three seforim for print, packing for a trip back to Israel and organizing the ******* ***** event and being miserable and moody, I would be delighted to comply...

My sister just noticed that I'm in a bad mood. I agree.

your sister is a female protagonist, so take her opinion with a grain of quinoa
go for a second opinion
preferably to ChaimBoruchItcheYonasonElimelech

Leaving for Israel tonight. Wow, so much resentment at Hashem. I was in Belz* on shabbos, all my friends, all of them wearing shtreimlach, besides for nebach that one with this problem, and the other one nebach with this problem... and me. And I'm asking Hashem: What the gehennom do you want from me? WHAT?! Are my character traits so much worse then ChaimBoruchItcheYonasonElimelech, so I need to work on them before marriage, c'mon! We both know that my character, with all its flaws is better at least than ItcheYonasonElimelech, so what do you want from me? Why do I have to feel that no one wants me in America and no one wants me in Israel. Yup that's how I feel, unwanted. So?

I don't know. Point is I presented my plan for life to Hashem, and he didn't accept it, he has a different plan. So I'm angry. I didn't learn gemara since Aseres Yemei Teshuva [maybe a bit over Sukkos]. I didn't learn my daily seder in Mishna Berura for over a week. I didn't do hilchos gittin at all, since before Rosh HaShana, so maybe I won't graduate a Divorce Rabbi [which is maybe not so bad, seeing as they're targeted by the FBI and all...]

I don't know. I thought I know and understand everything. Turns out I don't.

[grrr?]

You have no idea what Hashem thinks of you. The anger you are feeling is due to the fact that you hate yourself for not measuring up to your own standards. Hashem probably wants to scream at you right now to lower your standards a bit and have some fun.