so... last night was hard but i survived 

i'm dealing with a lot of tension and stress right now
nothing like T&S to bring you down

That's when addiction is at its worst;STRESS! Whenever your stressed it's time to reach out to a sponsor,spouse,......

As I learned inn the last couple of days, staying inside your head when stressed is the worst thing. Reach out to a real person by phone or meet someone live, save yourself!

lately i'm down  :-[ so i decided to start posting here about my progress at least once a week
i also took a taphsic kabbalah bli neder that whenever i feel an urge for ... whatever i must first write down this rashba (www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=4357.0) in any language [english, yiddish, lashoin kodesh, aramaic- maybe polish when i learn it- also i would love to learn latin.... it seems cool to b able 2 write it] from a different angle than i wrote it previously.
eventually i'll have a whole sefer of 500 different ways to write this particular pshat
actually i take that back
i hope i won't even have to do it once  ;D

so get ready to start seeing me here guys....

ut in psalmis dicens truckin!

Is this what you meant to say?

Gevura ShebYesod wrote on 06 Jan 2012 17:21:

C'MON I KNOW PIG LATIN
I'M TALKIN' ABOUT THE REAL THING

i'm punching my card for this week
i've been so busy i haven't had time to breathe

as some of you know, i was on an airplane this week but i was sitting next to a pastor and we had a long conversation about religion (seriously, it was fun + he said he never learned latin but he once tried greek) also i had a 700 page book with me and most importantly i was doing some work for zemmy
ZemirosShabbos wrote on 29 Dec 2011 21:27:

as for the future... it doesn't exist yet

the work was awesome!
you're hired!

if you see the pastor again tell him i saw his name on the milk bottle this morning, although they spelled it pasteur

ZemirosShabbos wrote on 11 Jan 2012 18:05:

he doesn't speak french only greek, remember.

OFFICIAL POST:
Although I have phone numbers of several chaveirim, both ba'aretz uva'olam.
I find it very difficult to make a phone call when I'm afraid I'll fall. I think this kind of defeats the whole purpose of me having their numbers.
Any advice?

Don't think, just dial.

I made 8 phonecalls one day, and was SO relieved when no one answered each time. Untill one guy answered and it was SO nice to talk to him. SO that's how we operate, the disease wants you to think you're the only one in the world who can relate to you, but the truth is we all can.
Love and hatzlocho.
And since there isn't much cooking going on in the kitchen, would you turn down the light and lock the freezer?

OFFICIAL POST:
My name is TZ and I'm addicted to sex/lust.
Yes.
I am not TZ who likes to RAT, I am not a chassidish "top bachur"
I am an addict
Yes.
To sex.
Yes. And I'm only two days clean on the chart. Yes.
And I'm finally ready to come around and be honest with myself:
Do you hear TZ, no matter how smart, good, fine, and talented you are- in so many different ways.
You are trapped.
By an Illness.
The only way for you to recover is by starting to take this illness seriously, and by running to a doctor the minute you begin having symptoms, or perhaps even earlier.
GOT THAT?

Another Official Post:
i fell again
today
:-[
:'(


earlier today i quoted the captain kirk story
and i believe i have to internalize it.
this could be pshat of what we say in tachanun
she'ein anu azei panim ukeshei oref lomar lefanecha tzaddikim anachnu velo chatanu...