morning' BOT, here's my opening volley in the GYE Funny Face Smackdown

and they say that there is no situation which lust cannot make worse
and a GYE person texted me this morning the three rules of staying clean
rule #1: REACH OUT
rule #2: REACH OUT
rule #3: REACH OUT

sort of like real estate if you think of it

A VERY  good analogy zemmy. thanks  . Yes here i am now probabl about an hour since my last post. I did a bunch of work and then finished what i was dong and wham- got teh itch to search something not good. Instead Hshem gave me teh ability to turn to Him and post on the forum instead. BH. I cant afford to waste time on p*. I need rachmei shamayim. and there is only one way that p* viewing will tke me

backwards

Gonna have to shift this here MONSTUH truck into high gear and keep in touch with me buddies....

what wisdom have your buddies imparted?
the secret of Bermuda Triangle? Fountain of Youth? Gordian Knot? Atlantis?
please share the goodies

ZemirosShabbos wrote on 23 Aug 2011 17:09:


It is called caring.

very well said

Yeah its amazing how this culture of caring developed and grew into s/t that really provides real world help to ppl. It grew from some ppl who joined a forum looking for help and caring. And today gye is fast becoming one of the most effective tools for the tzibbur to address issues that have perplexed madrichei hatzibur for a decade. I think that the secret ingredient is that mutual caring that has developed. While we are all here for our own sibrty, part of that is clearly to share w/ those that are suffering in addiction and help them suffer a little less by showng that care.

I felt my thread needed a brilliantly insightful post this morning.... But that earlier one was what came out.... Oh well...

i think that post qualifies

and besides, if you want to make brilliantly insightful posts you need a tweed jacket, pipe, cap and a couch. oh, and you need to know how to blow smoke rings in the air. so unless you convert the cab of yo' monstuh' truck you will need to pull over into the rest area for a quick thinking session.

nichamtani.

ok here is a tough one. I don know exactly how to figure this out. Basically, I find that during the assur days, or during days when we are not together, I can look forward to being together with my wife in an emotional and healthy way. Once the permitted time comes, I have challenges with my own desires cropppingup... but I am working on it and improving. BUT here is a problem that i really dont know how to dal with..... Instead of being in a good mood like on an erev leil tevilla, or on som other night when we are planning to be together, I fnd that i can get more irritable. Its not to say that there are not some pressures associated with leil tevila. there are. i have to be aroud usualy to spend the time taking care of teh kids etc... while she is getting ready (a blessing that i have kids right?) and there are some other challenges. But- i dont think it is an external thing. I sense in myself some weakness.. or some issue to put it more clearly, that is setting me on edge about being together. Ifi dont control it and work erally hard, i can lose my temper and it can turn an entire 'magic' evening, into an emotional disaster.

this happened to me pretty recently, where we were planning on being together, and through acombination of things (which had been present for the last 4 weeks, i just lost myself and got upset. I told my wife i couldnt do it in that frame of mind and we held off. but it is chaval as we are on the end of the cycle and everyday is counting down to yemei issur. ....

I guess apart from kvetching i a wondeirng if anyone else finds tehmselves MORE prone to anger, anxiety, negativeness (or any of those yumy topics) DAVKA in the day or hours prior to being together.


thanks.

IIRC, there was a thread about this very subject, i will go see if i can find it

in the meantime, is it possible that their is some subconscious expectation for the way the evening should go and there is also a certainty that it won't be as great as wished and that sets off the negativity? just wondering

www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=1801.0

Yeah, this discussion should probably move to the balei batim's section.

yeah, how do i get a pass to the married folks forum.....