Hi  A Gutten Erev Shabbos. 
I imagine that a lot of you are not online but that's ok
68 FFB married with lots of children and grandchildren.
I've been watching and practicing P&M since I was a kid early teens. 
I've gone to strip clubs and had lap dances and with the internet I've been in Chat rooms sharing pics n watching other people on cams. 
Pretty scary how it became such a normal part of my life. 
I don't think I've ever gone more than 30-35 days clean my entire life. 
I'm a fine upstanding active board member in my Yeshivishe Minyan Shul, I've been honored at dinners more than once and B"H I've been very smart, in protecting and hiding this part of my life. 
My wife is oblivious to anything. We have filters on our phones, Ipads etc but of course I have my own laptop which is not filtered and I can surf as I please. My children all see that my laptop and devices are filtered and we've talked about the dangers of unfiltered computers for both adults and children.  

I've sworn off P&M plenty of times, especially in the past 4 years but I keep on falling back, getting up n falling back down, but hey I'm back up today and for the last 6 days as well B"H.

I have a Frum therapist who knows everything and he has been a big help. My decision to join GYE is a big step for me and I hope to get the support I am looking for. 

Clearly I need to take my other laptop to TAG so that's the next step, and I think I'm a good candidate for having my own mentor as well. 

I just wanted to say hi and thank all of you for making this possible and if there is any way that any of you feel that you could benefit from chatting with me I'm here for you too. 

Have a good Shabbos and keep up the good fight.

Welcome to the most amazing family!
Here we care about you, and we want to hear from you, so please keep sharing!
I'm happy to hear you have a therapist helping you with this. And we are here to be your friends and brothers, to keep you motivated to keep trucking!
Since you seem to already be open to talking to guys here, I'll tell you that that is the one greatest gift you can give yourself. Reach out and make some friends. Together, we can reach the top!
Stick around, there's much to learn. Get to know the chevrah, and beH you'll be on your way soon!

Shalom, and welcome to the beginning of the end of your problem. It is good to see another "old" guy. I am 59, and I sometimes get concerned that I am too old for this site, but don't worry, the people here do not judge you by age, your level of observance, or what type of problem brought you here; they are just glad that you are here!!! 

adam2014 wrote on 06 Jul 2024 10:25:

This is a road well traveled with the directions clear and the road bright. Hop in the monster truck and bust all obstacles outta the way. 
You can do this . TODAYis always the best time to start

baalteshuvawannabee wrote on 05 Jul 2024 21:58:

Wow.  Welcome and wishing you tremendous hatzlocha.  The enjoyment of being free of the activities you describe is beyond what I could have imagined.   I am in my mid fifties. Please stay active here and get to know the chevra.  

beat wishes
vehkam

Hi
thanks for your encouragement
I'd be interested in getting a copy of battle of the generation
my email is baalteshuvawannabee@gmail.com
thanks so much

baalteshuvawannabee wrote on 07 Jul 2024 10:36:

Hi and welcome to this fantastic website!!
Very inspiring to hear about your journey and your courage to start fresh!
I have sent the book to your email.
Keep us posted!!

Welcome!

I can't imagine the courage it took for you to seek support in this field. It's truly inspiring!

I don't think this site has an age limit. It's full of warmth and hope for anyone struggling. That's one of the tools this site has to offer: friends who truly care, kicking away the loneliness that so many of us have felt for the longest time.

Hatzlacha on ur journey!

Welcome to the GYE Family!
Here you will find (and have found already...) warmth, care and acceptance.
Read around (some of the great threads are here), post, and when you are ready getting in touch with some of the great people on this site can be a tremendous help.

Hatzlacha and KOMT!

P.S. If you are daring and ready for that step, reach out to Hashem Help Me - michelgelner@gmail.com - one of main mentors on this site. He has helped hundreds, present company included.

got it thank you
i ordered a hard copy as well from amazon

i am looking forward to participating and contributing

thanks so much

baalteshuvawannabee wrote on 07 Jul 2024 14:37:

Just one small point. A crucial part of recovery is being here consistently, sharing and discussing.
You can do this - We're here for you

baalteshuvawannabee wrote on 05 Jul 2024 21:58:

Welcome! It is a chizuk that you are here. No matter when, where, what, or for how long, we can always fight to change.

If you are serious about TAGing your other laptop, perhaps it would behoove you to pick someone you connect with here (your mentor) for accountability, and you can follow up with them on this and any future goals you are working towards?

Much hatzlacha!

Welcome to the forum! It's great to have a Zeidy on board. Although there are many people here that have been cleaner for longer, I'm sure we can all benefit from your life's experience. I have found that the friends that you make on this forum are like no others. The weirdest thing is, that I've found myself opening up to people, getting guidance from them, and being inspired by people 20 years younger than I am. For some reason, the age gap seems to melt away when it comes to matters of קדושה. I guess if the YH attacks all ages, then all ages can stand together against him in this fight. Looking forward to hearing from you, and to gain from you. We're in this together.

Thank you all for your very warm welcome and words of encouragement.
Today is the beginning of day #9 and things are going well.
My plan to TAG my laptop was pushed off a day because my wife had plans that kept me busy but today should work.
I agree with the idea of having it not only TAGed but also have it report to a mentor for accountability, so I'll have my therapist be that person.

I've been here, Day #9,  so many times and very often in the past it felt like "this times going to be different" and maybe it was different but not different enough to prevent me from acting out so I need to be optimistic but cautious as well to be aware of my actions and motivations to make this the last day #9

hope that makes sense

Thank you again for being here

Just so you know, you don't need to go down to TAG to get you computer filtered. They can email you a link where you download the filter and then they set it up for you remotely from you account. Even if you end up needing to go to TAG later to adjust some settings I highly recommend first getting the filter installed.
Hatzocha