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TOPIC: Homosexuality 1906 Views

Homosexuality 09 Jan 2024 21:24 #406731

  • sbg
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How do I deal with homosexual feelings at the mikvah?

Re: Homosexuality 09 Jan 2024 21:31 #406733

  • gevura shebyesod
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Try to avoid looking at other people.
Personally I don't go very often, and when I do the rules are:
Glasses first off and last on
face the wall as much as possible
Otherwise keep eyes on the floor
get in and out as fast as possible.
Hatzlacha!
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


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Re: Homosexuality 09 Jan 2024 21:39 #406738

  • cordnoy
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Gevura Shebyesod wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:31:
Try to avoid looking at other people.
Personally I don't go very often, and when I do the rules are:
Glasses first off and last on
face the wall as much as possible
Otherwise keep eyes on the floor
get in and out as fast as possible.
Hatzlacha!

Thank you.
Godspeed.

My wife tells me 4 outta those 5 thin's you mentioned above.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1Page 2Page 3Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
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Re: Homosexuality 09 Jan 2024 21:46 #406739

  • redfaced
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cordnoy wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:39:

Gevura Shebyesod wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:31:
Try to avoid looking at other people.
Personally I don't go very often, and when I do the rules are:
Glasses first off and last on
face the wall as much as possible
Otherwise keep eyes on the floor
get in and out as fast as possible.
Hatzlacha!

Thank you.
Godspeed.

My wife tells me 4 outta those 5 thin's you mentioned above.

Now you sound like Trouble !
May you slide down the banister of happiness and get many splinters of success up your career

Feel free to send me an owl, a howler, or even a Crumple-Horned Snorkack to Iamredfaced@gmail.com


The Red Face

Re: Homosexuality 09 Jan 2024 21:58 #406744

  • cordnoy
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cordnoy wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:39:

Gevura Shebyesod wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:31:
Try to avoid looking at other people.
Personally I don't go very often, and when I do the rules are:
Glasses first off and last on
face the wall as much as possible
Otherwise keep eyes on the floor
get in and out as fast as possible.
Hatzlacha!

Thank you.
Godspeed.

My wife tells me 4 outta those 5 thin's you mentioned above.

She doesn't wish me hatzlachah.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1Page 2Page 3Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: Homosexuality 09 Jan 2024 22:05 #406746

  • willdoit
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cordnoy wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:58:

cordnoy wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:39:

Gevura Shebyesod wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:31:
Try to avoid looking at other people.
Personally I don't go very often, and when I do the rules are:
Glasses first off and last on
face the wall as much as possible
Otherwise keep eyes on the floor
get in and out as fast as possible.
Hatzlacha!

Thank you.
Godspeed.

My wife tells me 4 outta those 5 thin's you mentioned above.

She doesn't wish me hatzlachah.

Guess she is doubtful of u following those rules

Re: Homosexuality 09 Jan 2024 22:18 #406747

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sbg wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:24:
How do I deal with homosexual feelings at the mikvah?

How strong are those feelings?
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

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Re: Homosexuality 10 Jan 2024 17:34 #406785

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"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
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Re: Homosexuality 10 Jan 2024 18:01 #406790

  • chancy
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sbg wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:24:
How do I deal with homosexual feelings at the mikvah?

Hello SBG,

As i see you wrote about this issue a few years ago and it seems that you are still stuck in the similer place. Im not sure if its the same or better. 
All I know is that ive learned thru my own experience. 
1. A mikva is no place for someone with SSA. Period. End of story. You can fool yourself for 100 years. Its still true, 
2. Yes, going into a mikva and toiveling is a very holiness and cleansing thing to do. However, it wasnt meant to be like this! When our grandfathers went it was either in a freezing lake or cold well. Not in a naked spa.... where everyone sits around without any decency or eidelkiet. 
3. When you Must go (I only go Friday, Shabbos) do the folllwing. 1. Stop before entering and ask Hashem to help you keep clean. 2. Take off your glasses, (I got glasses for this reason, I had contacts for 20+ years). 3. run in and out. 

Im sorry for being so brosque and those of us on here without SSA will think im being overdramatic. But im not, even if you dont find men attractive, it still makes no sense to go purify yourself and while there  behave completely against eh basic 'tsinius'. I know for a fact that a lot of issues with innocent little bucherim start in the mikva. 
First of all, there are a lot of pervert in the mikva, which has gotten better in the mikva that have cameras, but still these perverts sit for hours and star at these holy bucherim like its a live chat site...... its really disturbing. 
Secondly, a boy gets born with a certain eidelkiet and 'busha' that keeps him from exposing too much of himself on front of others. once thats taken away by making it normal to prance around naked for half an hour in front of tens or hundreds of people, he looses that innocence forever!

Im yelling because it hurts me. 
Sorry about that.

Re: Homosexuality 10 Jan 2024 18:30 #406794

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sbg wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:24:
How do I deal with homosexual feelings at the mikvah?

Can't you go in the 'tunnel' Mikvah?
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1Page 2Page 3Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: Homosexuality 10 Jan 2024 19:24 #406799

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sbg wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:24:
How do I deal with homosexual feelings at the mikvah?

you olney have these feelings in the mikva??
then your creating your own issue,( you obviously dont even have the courage to take off your glasses. why do you think hashem created glasses for?)
who asked you to go to a mikva??
stay home, and if you want to feel holy pour ט' קבין on your self in your non homosexual bathroom.
Last Edit: 10 Jan 2024 19:31 by cande.

Re: Homosexuality 10 Jan 2024 19:41 #406802

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cande wrote on 10 Jan 2024 19:24:



you olney have these feelings in the mikva??
then your creating your own issue,( you obviously dont even have the courage to take off your glasses. why do you think hashem created glasses for?)
who asked you to go to a mikva??
stay home, and if you want to feel holy pour ט' קבין on your self in your non homosexual bathroom.

No offense - but, dude relax.
May you slide down the banister of happiness and get many splinters of success up your career

Feel free to send me an owl, a howler, or even a Crumple-Horned Snorkack to Iamredfaced@gmail.com


The Red Face
Last Edit: 10 Jan 2024 19:42 by redfaced.

Re: Homosexuality 10 Jan 2024 20:06 #406805

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redfaced wrote on 10 Jan 2024 19:41:
No offense - but, dude relax.

@ refaced
how do i deal with sexual feelings in a strip club? 

Re: Homosexuality 10 Jan 2024 20:17 #406808

  • ainshumyeiush
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cande wrote on 10 Jan 2024 19:24:

sbg wrote on 09 Jan 2024 21:24:
How do I deal with homosexual feelings at the mikvah?

you olney have these feelings in the mikva??
then your creating your own issue,( you obviously dont even have the courage to take off your glasses. why do you think hashem created glasses for?)
who asked you to go to a mikva??
stay home, and if you want to feel holy pour ט' קבין on your self in your non homosexual bathroom.

i dont like getting into arguments, but seriously?!?
"you dont have the courage to take off your glasses"!?! Because you know the poor guy has glasses? Or that if he does he doesn't take them off??
and no he didn't create the problem for himself. I cant imagine anyone wakes up in the morning like "you know what, let me be ssa today. Why not throw on another nisayon". Hashem created some people with different attractions, if you cant accept that, take it up with Him. 
"wanting to feel holy" is not the reason most people go to the mikva, some communitys expect everyone to go every day. If the poster is in a yeshiva where everyone goes, he may not have a choice.
if you aren't ssa, or you dont have anything practical or helpful to share, then feel free to not share.
im sorry if i offended you, but  attacking the poster is really not the right thing to do. At least try to understand that you dont understand.
"Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm" - Winston Churchill

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guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/401159-This-time-for-real?limit=15&start=15#401727


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Re: Homosexuality 10 Jan 2024 20:25 #406810

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Sorry if I came across too harshly.
​I understand that everyone is wired differently.
And I certainly respect the unique challenge of every tzadik on this forum.
Shteig away!
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