Everyone has got to do what works best for them. Hatzlacha!

Where on the site can I find the recovery guide by Hashem Help Me?

Where on the site can I find the recovery guide by Hashem Help Me?It's under the category "Announcements". But I would recommend that you rather reach out to the man himself at michelgelner@gmail.com. Stuff on the internet isn't a substitute for a real relationship

I agree. I reached out to him already.

I will be going to Israel when the weather is nice. I am attracted to chassidishe women because of their dignity and beautiful clothing, and to all Israeli women because I feel like they are my friends. Of course this is a fallacy. Many Israeli non-religious women aren't even Jewish. If I were to tell Israeli women that they were my friends they would probably give me a very cross look. 

​I am looking for safeguards so that my thoughts and actions remain pure. I read the book of Rabbi Ezriel Tauber years ago and it helped me a lot in the past. When going in the streets, I went around with the thought that my neshama is a chelek eloka mima'al and it is beyond my dignity to lust. I also went around with the thought that I am the son of Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov, whereas lust comes from the decadence of a corrupt culture that is way below me. I walked with pride that I am not eating in the same trough as the non-Jewish sub-humans. I still had feelings of lust in the past, I was prone to M and these positive thoughts weren't as powerful as now after being on GYE for over half-a-year. Hopefully now I will be more successful.

I also have to put safeguards in place regarding behavior. I shouldn't be talking to any women other than immediate family unless there is a real reason. If I do have to talk to a woman I can be polite but I don't have to talk more than is necessary. I should also treat her as a person, understand that she has a life of her own and avoid objectifying her.

If anyone has additional thoughts to share I would be glad to listen.

yitzchokm wrote on 17 Jan 2024 00:01:

"Non-Jewish sub-humans"!? You're a sick fellow; go get some real help. Explains why you're eatin' from a trough!

cordnoy wrote on 17 Jan 2024 01:22:

I should have written as those with non-Jewish sub-human behavior. What I meant was non-Jews with sub-human behavior. There are non-Jews who keep the seven Noahide Laws and they are moral. Unfortunately, although I am Jewish, I was immoral. The reason I used the term non-Jewish is because of the words in the Torah כמעשה ארץ מצרים אשר יצאתם משם לא תעשו וכמעשה ארץ כנען אשר אני מביא אתכם שמה לא תעשו. And yes, immoral behavior is sub-human. And yes, the Torah calls Yishmael and Eliezer עם הדומה לחמור. And yes, gazing at women is like eating from a trough; a borrowed metaphor from chazal's statement אני וחמורי ניכול באבוס אחד. I also wasn't referring to human in the general term but to chazal's words אתם קרויים אדם, the perfected human being, a term which has no English equivalent in this context. And true, some of what is dealt with on GYE is permitted for non-Jews.

Someone who refers to a non-Jew as sub-human won't hear from me again; I'm done with you.

#עם ישראל חי

I made a big mistake in my first post. I am sorry, I beg forgiveness and I will try not to do it again. I am also sure that I offended people with that term and I ask forgiveness. I checked the Webster dictionary and this was their explanation of subhuman: failing to attain the level (as of morality or intelligence) associated with normal human beings. This was not what I meant. I realize that non-Jews and people like myself and others who have struggles are normal human beings. What I meant was that this behavior is immoral for the perfected human being. I also realize that there are Jews who are immoral. Please help me find the right wording. 

I think my second post matches the words of Rabbi Ezriel Tauber in his printed book but perhaps I am mistaken. Do you disagree with my second post? If yes, please specify so that everyone can gain clarity.

cordnoy wrote on 17 Jan 2024 03:07:

thats a punishment?

cande wrote on 17 Jan 2024 04:37:

Yes. Without his criticism that set things straight the last time I made a serious mistake, and a kind email that he sent me asking how I was doing after I left the forum because I was addicted to it at the time and then had 3 setbacks, I would not be here today with a long streak. The last thing I want is for Cordnoy to be done with me.

Rabbi Ezriel Tauber's usage of חמור for non-Jews was regarding western society's cultural liberalism regarding sex. I have geirim in my family and I know what it feels like to read my original posts. I have no way of asking forgiveness from real people on an anonymous forum. I also have no way of erasing my words once they were read. If you can forgive me please do so. What I can say is that geirim changed their whole life to become Jewish and the only thing I might have changed in my whole life is my struggle for which I joined GYE.

A quote from Rav Avigdor Miller z"l:
Always we remember that every human being has on his face the image of Hashem. And so when you look at any person you must have respect. When I was in Slabodka, they refused to call a goy a sheigetz; a sheigetz means an abomination – they refused to say that. We never called a goy a sheigetz because it is a contradiction to the doctrine of the glory of Mankind’s greatness. And that is what the Mishnah says, חביב אדם שנברא בצלם – Mankind is cherished by Hashem that He created them in His image. And if we can spread the news to the world, we are doing them a great favor; we are letting them know the message from Hashem, that He looks upon you with a very great affection because you are the image of Hashem. 

The fact that a person can ruin that image by wrong emotions; that he can twist his face in wicked grimaces and make his face the opposite of noble, nevertheless if he would learn, if he would be trained, you can take that savage and you can make out of him a noble personality. And he can become a Jew too. But even if he doesn’t become a Jew, he could be become a chassid umos haolam and he will become worthy of chayei Olam Haboh – and that is saying a lot. 

Alright, Cords, he did teshuva - now you could be חותר חתירה תחת כסא כבודך and be מקבל the תשובה...

hechochma wrote on 17 Jan 2024 17:01:

Cords carries his cane in the right hand (ימין דוחה) - he might have somethin' in common with Shamai Hazakon
(דְּחָפוֹ בְּאַמַּת הַבִּנְיָן שֶׁבְּיָדוֹ)