Its not just photos it can be text as well and very easy to get 

Im in a much better place now motzei shabbos than I was on friday and gonna use this clear headedness to make some changes:

- will update the challenge with new terms (see that thread)

yeah thats pretty much it. trying to fill my time with more Torah and other stuff to leave myself less time for shmutz

EvedHashem, did you get lost?

I'm back!

For reasons I won't get into I haven't been on GYE for the last few days but now I'm here again!

Holding at 115 days BH

Update: Been doing exceptionally well and holding at 125 days!

Has been incredible - no major urges at all since my little fiasco right after 90 (so about a month ago). I still get the occasional thought while I'm in bed either going to sleep or waking up but have been pretty good at changing thought topics pretty quickly if that makes sense

If anything have been becoming more vigilant as opposed to more lax. Every night I do a little 10 min "night seder" going through a day of living emunah (rabbi ashear), a day of battle of the generation, and a day of shmiras halashon (newly added yesterday) and this is prob one of the biggest reasons I think I have been really smooth its such constant chizzuk its incredible. I use a hard copy of battle of generation for this easily worth the investment (10 bucks)

My goal was 90 days by elul but bezH I'll have 180 days by then! 

Keeping going strong,

Eved Hashem

You're awesome!
Keep it up!

136! more than halfway from 90 to 180

trucking

Wow way to go bro!
Keep up the good work and being an inspiration

If you asked me in february if I thought I would be where I am today...

Life is so much better this way


I feel kind of guilty because I might be able to help other people more but kind of just don't - part of that is probably due to the weird nature of mentoring 40 year olds as a 18 year old but still feel like I should be doing more.

I think the responsibility would help me too, but don't want anything influencing me to go back to my old ways. Even reading some content here gets me triggered (which is ok, thats the nature of this website), but I wouldn't want that to be something I have the responsibility to deal with.

Thoughts?

EvedHashem1836 wrote on 30 Jun 2021 01:20:

I wouldn't worry about the age gap. If you have something to offer, offer it! In terms of the triggers, if you find yourself in a mentoring role, you can make rules about how many and what kind of details the mentee shares.

Mentoring married guys may be very triggering. There are enough bochurim out there that can use your chizuk and advice.

Hashem Help Me wrote on 30 Jun 2021 20:22:

Probably wouldn't work either, you need to understand someone in order to mentor them and I find it hard to believe that a bachur could understand a married guy.

I think you would probably be the most effective with younger students in your school.

Hey EvedHashem1836, how's it going?

180. Big number.

My goal was to get to 90 by elul and now I got to 180 BH.

Recently I've found it more helpful to not be on GYE personally because I often find myself getting triggered here. Which is ok - GYE is not meant to be a trigger free zone, people post about their problems which inevitably will trigger other people. For me the biggest issue though is when people get too specific. They say, last night I struggled with xxxx or xxxxx and I would think to myself what is that so I would head over to google and boom I'd get triggered. Or it would be something I know but I pushed to the back of my head and I'd be reminded again. So for that reason mostly I'd say I haven't been here for a while and not sure if I'm going to return to my active posting ways.

That being said I owe an incredible debt to GYE for bringing me to where I am today - without GYE and the incredible chevra here I doubt i'd have gotten past 14 days over the entire year.

To clarify - I'm not advising dropping GYE I'm just saying what was helpful for me. Also keep in mind that I am not the traditional addict I always had a lot of motivation and drive and never even saw real hardcore porn (although I've seen plenty of really bad stuff that might qualify) so for most people its probably helpful to talk about these things but for me its almost better if I don't talk about it because talking about it almost gives it validity and at this point the less I think about it the less its an issue.

Shoutout to my buddy HappyYid for being in this journey with me.

My next goal is to work on not touching myself