בענין פילטערס

מדרש רבה נח

כל פרצה שאינה מן הגדולים אינה פרצה.

עי' עץ יוסף

שכשהגדולים עצמם פרצו בעבירה אין להם תקנה.

Watson wrote on 09 Nov 2016 08:13:

Yes. That I need my Higher Power more than I think. That I should listen to myself and how I'm feeling (not going into what that means). I'm sure there's more.

thanks for worrying about me loosing my thread. but i was actually happy about where it went. as i wrote filters don`t help me much, and was curios what others like myself do about it. i understand shlomo (the filter part, not the destiny part. which i believe is a lot deeper than what this forum allows for, and needs big people to clarify. as that point of coexistence of emunah and bechirah is a very delicate subject.) as the filter is  not really a deterrent. however i still have them on my devices as i use it  like a 3 second rule. which although the trigger was seen you  have the extra second try to reprogram. Granted it doesn't work all the time but it sure helps me  which for even it only stopped me once its worth the expense of the better filter.

Shlomo24 wrote on 09 Nov 2016 05:12:

As Cordnoy wrote above, "to each there own"
There have been many many times - in fact almost Everytime that i was online i said "Thank G-d there was a filter because I would have acted out otherwise." If i didn't say it, it was probably because there was no filter and i did act out (or come close)

stillgoing wrote on 09 Nov 2016 23:34:

I feel like people on this forum don't understand that. I have repeatedly said that my experience isn't others. I respect your experiences SG, and you keep on doing what works for you. And I will keep on doing what my sponsor suggests and what has worked for me. 

Right on Shlomo24. The road to sobriety need not necessarily be the same for one as for another. But one thing is the same. We all have to be focused what works for us, be honest if we need to tweak, and brave enough to make the necessary changes. "cause change cab hit psychological buttons thqat are not always so easy to handle.

Do not misunderstand  - I am not saying YOU should change one iota from what you are doing - follow the sponsor that knows you best and you feel comfortable with - just saying in General guys need to be ready to change course if that's what's needed.



Hatzlocho!

yiraishamaim wrote on 10 Nov 2016 02:51:

Shlomo,
I definitely respect your choice to figure out your own plan and how a filter affects you. I know that when he filter is too tight it's like a game to try to crack it and when it's too loose it will eventually be a problem for me and there's a happy medium somewhere.

I know that when I write in suggesting a filter to you it's because you've been sharing your story and from my perspective of hearing your story it sounds like it might be worth trying. So I wouldn't try to convince you but maybe suggest a reevaluation. But of course if you're confident in following your sponsor and don't think the filter is what's missing, then power on in the way you see fit. 

Shlomo24 wrote on 08 Nov 2016 14:53:

The porn industry is not this passive force sitting there hidden away somewhere in a remote corner of the internet waiting for people who are interested in it to go hunting it down and seeking it out.  It's a malicious industry, probably the wealthiest as well, that is actively trying to trap as many people as they can.

We start off with a handicap, and filters help us maybe have an even chance not to get sucked in.

Just another way to look at it.

Newleaf354 wrote on 17 Nov 2016 13:29:

I second that, the porn industry is also the most advanced in technology and in offering newer, faster, and better ways (technological speaking) to get sucked in.....

New and Yid: Have you worked in the porn industry before? You seem to know all about the business side of things.

Shlomo24 wrote on 17 Nov 2016 19:02:

No need to, was on the consumer end and anyone can see how advanced they are technological.... simple as that!

But how do you know they're malicious? All successful companies try to increase revenue and utilize advertising.

Shlomo24, I was referring to the "probably the wealthiest as well" comment, but to your point; the porn industry is making money by enticing people to the pleasures that they offer, tempting people to this stuff is not exactly just another business trying to increase revenue, there are many more factors coming to play here, I doubt you would say the same about drug dealing..... my opinion, you have every right to disagree

Here's my point: I don't watch porn because of what it does to me. The business side doesn't matter in the slightest. Whether someone is trying to stop because of Torah or whether they're like me, the industry doesn't matter. If every porn star donated all their money to starving children in Africa I still wouldn't watch porn. So the fact that it might not be the most moral industry is not relevant. Furthermore, I respect that you have an opinion, but you aren't basing it on facts and/or experience. I actually have some insight into this topic and nowadays many porn actors and actresses view their occupation as a job like everyone else. But do I care? No! It's completely irrelevant.