Hi. lifes rough,, especially with all these tempting pictures on the internet, how do i overcome the desire when i have anxiety and worries which make it so hard to succeed in life?

Welcome to the forum! There is so much truth in your question that proves you are already ahead of the game! From your questions it seems that you understand it isn't the pictures that are your problem, it is the anxiety and worries that are. The pictures and acting out are your solution to your problems or so it seems from what your saying. That is the case for many of us here and the fact the you have come to that realization is a big step. You can put together the necessary tools to face life on its terms without the need to escape into pictures and acting out.

GYE suggests that you begin by following the links for new comers as found in my signature below.

Hatzlacha!!!

Welcome Joefrezman

I just joined two weeks ago.
Follow what Serenity suggests - go to your own homepage and work through it. Set up filters, join the 90 day challenge when you're ready. Sign up for chizuk emails. I know it will feel a bit overwhelming, however once you work through the step suggested in the homepage, before you know it you will be A for Away on your journey.

Try hang around the forums and meet the guys who post a lot. Look out for Serenity, Big Moish, Dov, and Skeptical, and Fulfilling lie 613 - they made contact with me and are great to talk to, gain insight as well as just to have on email should you need to talk. I'm sure there are other guys here too but the above mentioned are just the ones I chat to on a more regular basis.

The guys at GYE are really great and I hope you use them/us to your advantage.
Just remember - one day at a time, and if that's not good enough for you, one moment at a time.

Hatzlocha Rabo and please don't hesitate to make contact.

embarrassedhusband@gmail.com

Welcome!

A lot of guys here have anxiety; it's pretty common it seems. Just try your best not to overthink the process in the beginning here. Hang out and learn as much as you could; the answers will come on their own.

thanks a lot for your support guys

Welcome,

Let's put the desires on the side for a moment; how do you overcome anxiety and worries period?

b'hatzlachah

I really appreciate your post. For me it embodies the innocence in all of us. It was straight forward and perfect. " I want to stop looking at things i shouldn't. period." One thing though that i did feel from your post, and i could be wrong, i felt a touch of reassurance on your part. Meaning, you said its especially difficult when your anxious or worried etc. I felt, and again could be wrong, as most of us on this site do, that we come to realize how dishonest we are with ourselves. Granted, you are anxious, and that sucks, but be very careful never to have it in your head that that makes it "ok" to mess up. "well im feeling ------(fill in the blank) so i [i]need[i]to mess up and then afterward we justify it by saying that our feelings made us get to that point. like Cordnoy said the anxiety needs to be dealt with, but try not to mix it with the messing ups, its a slippery slope once we find "reasons" that justify messing up. It could be i was really unclear here, lemme know and i could explain myself better.

mr.clean wrote:


Extremely clear!

Great post, Mr. Clean. Yeah, the addict mind is an expert at finding excuses to do what it desires.

mr.clean wrote:


thanks for writing that, mr. clean, i thought that was a very important point. I did some soul searching and i agree with your point immensely, A MAJOR reason why i go after my lust is because :
i AM ANGRY AT LIFE AND JEALOUS OF HOW OTHER PEOPLE ARE ABLE TO DO WHAT THEY WANT, AND I FEEL I HAVE THE TALENT BUT AM HELD BACK FROM PREFORMING AS WELL BECAUSE I FEEL SHACKLED TO MY ANXIETY AND STAY STUCK IN MY SHELL,AND THEREFORE, SOMETIMES I FEEL JUSTIFIED TO SIN AND SAY DEEP IN MY HEAD, THAT G-D UNDERSTANDS AND THIS IS THE ONLY AVENUE FOR ME TO RELAX. OF COURSE, I KNOW ITS NOT TRUE AND GOD ONLY GIVES SOMEONE A CHALLENGE HE CAN HANDLE, AND ITS FOR A REASON AND I HAVE TO WORK THRU IT, AND I INTELLECTUALLY KNOW THAT NO GOOD WILL COMES FROM LUST ANYWAYS, BUT STILL IT IS A MAJOR IF NOT THE MAJOR RATIONALIZATION WORKING IN THE DEEP RECESSES OF MY MIND WHICH WEAKENS MY RESISTANCE AND ALLOWS ME TO ACT OUT.
I AM WONDERING HOW MANY PEOPLE WHO STRUGGLE WITH LUST HAVE THAT SAME MAJOR RATIONALIZATION?
also to CORDNOY- how am i dealing with that: well i have been in therapy trying to help that but it is sooooooooooooooo depressing and painful to have emotional pain that any avenue seemed like a breath of fresh air, especially if it was pleasure. but masterbations on reg clothes magazines which came in the mail morphed into internet stuff and the frequency that i got into those things got closer and closer. I have a job and cant afford to take off from work and the internet makes me irresponsible.

my heart goes out to you.
it is extremely tough.
May God be with you.

I was askin' that you seemingly need to tackle the anxiety issue and the worries independently of the lust issue.

Thanks for your honesty.