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TOPIC: I need help! Please! 979 Views

I need help! Please! 12 Mar 2015 17:21 #250393

  • LevTahor13
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Hi everyone,
My name is Moshe and I'm twenty years old. I've been struggling with this issue since a very young age (first stubled upon pornography at the age of 5) and have quit numerous times in the past year to no avail. I've put in the hishtadlus too: filters, shiurim, and I even see a weekly psychologist, but nothing so far has been greatly succesful. I recently joined GYE about 19 days and started the 90 days chart. I was clean for the first 19 days until today. It's always right when I start to feel like I'm finally beating this thing that it strikes. It's really frustrating. Really, really frustrating. Sometimes after falls I feel like it's unbeatable, that the yetzer hara has already won and that I'm doomed to a double-life of disgust and despair. Just picturing that moment when my future wife and kids(B"H) discover my secret makes me want to cry every time. I just thought it would help if I involved myself a little more in the GYE community.

Re: I need help! Please! 12 Mar 2015 17:32 #250394

  • gibbor120
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WELCOME! I lived the nightmare of my wife finding out after over a decade of marriage and 2 decades of acting out. I also quit many times, made charts, counted days, tried mussar and chizzuk... Nothing helped. Then my wife caught me. Our Rav helped us at first, but GYE helped much more. B"H, I'm 5 1/2 years sober now.

How is therapy going? Why did you start therapy? Who knows about your "problem"? How much have you told them?

Read the handbook, Post on the forum. We're here to listen. We know what you are going through. NEVER EVER GIVE UP!
Last Edit: 12 Mar 2015 17:33 by gibbor120.

Re: I need help! Please! 12 Mar 2015 18:19 #250397

  • doingtshuva
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welcome
start reading the handbook, and we all wish you Hatzluche.
 *  NO, It's not all or nothing, just every bit counts!
 *  I failed yesterday, and I might fail tomorrow. But just for today I'm going to give it a try.
 *  Being curios made me lust and get into trouble.
אָמַר רבי יוחנן: אֵבֶר קָטָן יֵשׁ לוֹ לָאָדָם, מַרְעִיבוֹ = שָׂבֵעַ, מַשְׂבִּיעוֹ = רָעֵב

Gye program + Handbook  -  Taphsik method  -  90 day chart  -  Ebooks  -  Shiurim  -  Rabbi Dr. Avraham Twerski  -  Recent topics on the Forum

Re: I need help! Please! 12 Mar 2015 18:37 #250399

  • Hashivalisesonyishecho
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LevTahor13 wrote:
I just thought it would help if I involved myself a little more in the GYE community.


That's exactly right. This is an entire community of serious people who are dealing with these issues. Being a part of this community is being connected to the most appropriate and helpful ideas and receiving and giving chizuk. Everything and anything that bothers us or that works for us, we deal with and discuss here to everyone's benefit. Here is a place where we are understood and we feel understood and not judged, so this allows for working through the issues without inhibition. And most importantly we are among wonderful caring friends.

So if everything else you tried didn't work for you, those things are nowhere near as helpful and effective as being connected here.

People, including myself, really get helped here. I think that you will too.

Re: I need help! Please! 12 Mar 2015 23:18 #250424

  • LevTahor13
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Thanks for all the chizuk! This has never really been a comtorable topic for me and I've had a hard time speaking about it with others. I guess the more I speak about it with others who are struggling with the same thing the better I actually started seeing a psychologist for other reasons and this problem surfaced. The only person that knows of my problem is my psychologist.

Re: I need help! Please! 12 Mar 2015 23:39 #250425

Welcome! I wish I were twenty when I found this site! Explore gye well there is tons to learn. Hatzlacha!

Re: I need help! Please! 13 Mar 2015 16:31 #250462

  • cordnoy
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Welcome,

there is a wealth of info on this site.
click links in people's signatures for good material.
some of it can be found on the home page.

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: I need help! Please! 13 Mar 2015 16:32 #250463

  • cordnoy
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Hashivalisesonyishecho wrote:
This is an entire community of serious people who are dealing with these issues.


And then we have some non-serious one's as well.
I'm in the latter group.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: I need help! Please! 13 Mar 2015 17:34 #250470

  • Hashivalisesonyishecho
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cordnoy wrote:
Hashivalisesonyishecho wrote:
This is an entire community of serious people who are dealing with these issues.


And then we have some non-serious one's as well.
I'm in the latter group.


You're not serious!

Re: I need help! Please! 13 Mar 2015 17:56 #250471

  • cordnoy
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Isn't that what I wrote?
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: I need help! Please! 13 Mar 2015 18:04 #250472

  • Hashivalisesonyishecho
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Yes, but you didn't mean it seriously.

Re: I need help! Please! 13 Mar 2015 18:17 #250473

  • cordnoy
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Hashivalisesonyishecho wrote:
Yes, but you didn't mean it seriously.


I wanted to tell you how serious I was that I am not a serious kinda guy, but there are fellows here who don't like when I use such words, and there are other fellows who don't like the symbols, so I was stuck....what was I to do?
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: I need help! Please! 13 Mar 2015 18:22 #250474

  • Hashivalisesonyishecho
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You are to lighten up and not take everything so seriously.
Last Edit: 13 Mar 2015 18:24 by Hashivalisesonyishecho.
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