just fell to watching some stuff, was clean for a little bit and able to not watch but i had a slip up, i feel like there is no true way out and that even if i dont fall for a while eventually the thought will come and ill fall

what do you base that feelin' on?
what have you tried?
have you spoken to people on this site?

Hi friend, cordnoy is so right and I totally recognized myself in your post. Before coming here in GYE I felt exactly like you, didn't succeed in staying clean for long period and when I was good for a longer period than usual I felt to much confident and after falling I was telling to myself "is it even possible to stop ?"
We think we are making real efforts in this struggle but let me tell you that since I'm here on GYE I made (little) things I didn't imagine I would do and I hope to continue in this way ! I've already been clean for a longer period than today but it was not the same that my current strike, totally different mindset and approach !

As cordnoy asked, try to ask yourself what have you tried ? Especially here on GYE ? I also advice you to keep contact here, to begin to read the strories on forum, and to begin to write and share your story here, I can tell you it helps a lot !!

Hoping to hear good news from you soon, with good resolutions !

I can say that I also thought there was no way out.
I wonder if there is anyone who joined GYE with great self-esteem and confidence that he will certainly succeed - and then just did svoila
you are in great company. KOT

I thought like you for over 20 years, now I'm sober B"H for close to 6. NEVER EVER GIVE UP!