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TOPIC: Marriage 16171 Views

Re: Marriage 07 Jan 2015 16:28 #246765

  • newaction
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The Big Book of AA says in page 25 : The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences which have revolutionized (changed) our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward G.od's universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves."


"We were in a position where life was becoming impossible, and if we had passed into the region from which there is no return through human aid, we had but two alternatives: One was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best we could; and the other, to accept spiritual help. This we did because we honestly wanted to, and were willing to make the effort." We're given two choices: Keep drinking or accept spiritual help.

So, will meetings everyday suffice? Therapy? Calling a sponsor everyday? Daily exercise? Yoga? All this things are excellent help tools . But the main thing is our change . Inner spiritual change that connects us to Hashem and He will take care of our problem . There is a solution and this is it .

Re: Marriage 08 Jan 2015 04:53 #246807

  • Shmeichel
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very well said
thanks
it helped me
i had similar story last night
i thought my wife would like, and she didnt, and i had a heavy chass mat situation to battle
then i prayed behind my quilt to hashem
thats its beyond my power, and b"h he helped me
when going forward gets tough, its merely a sign that you are going uphill, just give more gas
put your sobriety first; before your wife, before your kids, before your avodas HaTorah (except for the 3 that are יעבור ואל יהרג) Without sobriety you won't have any of those things!

Re: Marriage 08 Jan 2015 13:14 #246824

  • newaction
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I am very glad to hear that Schmeichel . Lust is like big waves in the sea , they look tall and horrifying ... but after they pass things look just serene and quiet as before and you wonder wow i was going to fall for that ? KUMT !! Behatzlacha !

Re: Marriage 01 Feb 2015 15:25 #247998

  • newaction
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.הודו לה' כי טוב כי לעולם חסדו Today i have reached 180 days up the ladder . It wasnt easy at the beginning and it is not easy now but B'H something is working and i am full of gratitude first to Hashem Yisbarach that through His Mercy i am where i am today . Secondly to this wonderful site GYE , they are doing avodas hakodesh and a tremendous service to klal Yisrael.And of course to all the forums of the chevra and Divrei Chizuk. In my journey to 180 i had two crises , a smaller one and a gigantic one which i was walking at the very edge of a big fall but B"H came out of it safe and sound Bechasdei shamayim. In any way you choose to look at it whether its two times 90 or 10 times chai it all boils to the same : "one day at a time". I wish everybody hatzlacha in their journey each one in their own conditions and circumstances. My love to all !

Re: Marriage 01 Feb 2015 16:38 #248003

  • unanumun
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Gevaldig. Keep up the good work.
And thanks for your chizzuk and inspiration as well.

Re: Marriage 01 Feb 2015 17:38 #248008

  • Shmeichel
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newaction wrote:
I am very glad to hear that Schmeichel . Lust is like big waves in the sea , they look tall and horrifying ... but after they pass things look just serene and quiet as before and you wonder wow i was going to fall for that ? KUMT !! Behatzlacha !

talking about big waves
i went swimming once in the open sea, all of sudden the sea became spontaneously wild
with huge waves, i remembered the gemoro with the story of reb akive
where he said that at each wave he bent down his head until it passed
and thats what i did, it took me about 15 minutes to get beck to shore
i thought i will not make it ch"v
but b"h here i am, hashem spared my life, chasdei hashem
maybe that should work as a lesson for my life struggles, to wait until the heavy urge passes, then raise me head back up
when going forward gets tough, its merely a sign that you are going uphill, just give more gas
put your sobriety first; before your wife, before your kids, before your avodas HaTorah (except for the 3 that are יעבור ואל יהרג) Without sobriety you won't have any of those things!

Re: Marriage 01 Feb 2015 18:53 #248011

  • newaction
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wow ! what a story ! You are right in your lesson , in addition you get to appreciate every minute of your life that Hashem spared you for a reason . I see that as sign of gratitude you will soon be offering one thousand clean days ! How do you plan to celebrate it ?

Re: Marriage 01 Feb 2015 18:59 #248012

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Unanumun thank you for your warm words they are very much appreciated ! hatzlacha to you too.

Re: Marriage 01 Feb 2015 19:09 #248014

  • cordnoy
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Keep it up!
B"H!
A tremendous accomplishment!
Keep on bein' mechuzak, and keep on bein' mechazek others.....at bias go'el b'meheirah!
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: Marriage 01 Feb 2015 19:12 #248016

  • newaction
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Amen ! thanks a lot Cordnoy וכן למר

Re: Marriage 03 Feb 2015 14:56 #248132

  • newaction
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Tonight is TU BISHVAT ! A time for renewal . according to the Chidushei Hari"m (Gur) There is a hichadshus in the learning of the Tora and just like Tu Beav is 40 days before 25 of Elul , so too Tu Bishvat is 40 days before 25 of Adar which is the creation of the world according to Rabi Yehoshua. BE"H This Holy Day of Tu Bishvat should bring a new beginning to the GYE Chevra and Klall Yisrael And it should be a new time of chizuk and reinforcement of our relationship with Hashem and in learning His Torah and it should be in the benefit of Am Yisrael and our own. Hatzlacha to all !!

Re: Marriage 03 Feb 2015 17:41 #248143

  • belmont4175
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As we know the Gemoroh of "Shoalin Ve'Dorshin Kodem Hachag Shloshim Yom" we start learning the laws of the festivals 30 days before its arrival, as Tu Bishvat is 30 days before Purim some had a custom of learning the Megillah or the Gemoroh Megillah, also the Simche starts already now, the Rebbes quoted Mi'Shenichnas Adar Marbin from when? from now (Tu Bi'Shvat) to be Be'Simche.

If we accept our challenges and work with them being Be'Simche, we can manage to get through more easily, Tzadikim say "Ki Be'Simche Teitzeiu" כי בשמחה תצאו with Simche a person can go out of all troubles.
הסיבה שיש דברים קשים העוברים עליך היא בגלל שהאדם חושב כי "אני עומד" שהוא מנהל הכל,
ברגע שיתן הכנעה כי השי"ת מנהיג הכל אז כבר אפשר להתמודד עם הקשיים. שמעתי מאדם גדול

If life is a LEMON make LEMONADE

Thank You Hashem for every moment of Sobriety!

Re: Marriage 04 Feb 2015 07:42 #248165

  • newaction
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Wow Belmont ! thank you for that . You just added TWO FULL WEEKS to "mishenichnas adar".
Hashem should add to you כהנה וכהנה lots of simcha and yeshuos to you and yours . And all the chevrah . Amen !

Re: Marriage 04 Feb 2015 08:38 #248166

  • Shmeichel
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!אמן
when going forward gets tough, its merely a sign that you are going uphill, just give more gas
put your sobriety first; before your wife, before your kids, before your avodas HaTorah (except for the 3 that are יעבור ואל יהרג) Without sobriety you won't have any of those things!
Last Edit: 04 Feb 2015 08:41 by Shmeichel.

Re: Marriage 04 Feb 2015 20:15 #248192

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newaction wrote:

even if she doesnt exactly know my addictions , she has lost all respect


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