בס"ד
Boruch Hashem I started the 90 day journey a week before my 34th birthday, my goal was a clean week, my next goal is another clean day.......
I am married a father of 3 wonderful kids.
About a half a year ago, i got pulled in to working in Chinuch Meyuchad (special education) of course i try to do my best, that all the kids should do their best.
then it hit me , I am not working on my self, how can I start working with others on themselves?
so i started thinking about working on my self, of course there is a lot to change. but to do one step at a time, and to focus on one thing at a time, I chose the Posuk "Sur Me'Ra , Va'Ase Tov..." to get rid of the bad stuff comes before doing the good things. so here I am!
Oy!!! I almost forgot! I have to tell you why here ?
it started many years ago,as a kid I was learning Halachot (I think it was Netilat Yadayim) there was a few words which i had no idea the meaning. Tashmish hamita, I asked first my friend he was also not sure, but he had a clue. then i asked my rebbe, and I KNEW he wasn't telling me the true answer, I can't remember what his answer was but it was a lie. it was bothering me. since that time, all the Gemaroth or the Pesukim that my Rebbe was telling us not to learn. I was learning it with as many Mefarshim I could lay hands on.
forward a few years....
I started learning computers, I got my own computer I connected it to the Internet... and start searching... i remember the first few searches was, to find out what is so bad about the internet, that so many rabbanim banned it completely and others only allow it with safe guards...
since then i searched all the keywords of all the Lo Ta'Ase, we are not allowed to do, and with time the answers i got were so graphic , that the learning ended and the lust started...
I started to become obsessed with it, I had to know where in the world people still live the way the Torah prohibits us. some answers are very scary... but the further I went, it kind of pulled me in, it was very difficult for me to turn around...
and I was still the perfect Ehrliche Yid from the outside (kind of)...

so now I am here, using the same tool to get lust. to find my self back on track...
Thank you all
good luck to you all

Welcome tcrvu (is that an acynom of something?)!!!!

You're in the right place, with people who understand you, who are going through the same thing as you!!

It basicaly started the same way with me, the curiosity burned, I needed to know what it meant, what they were doing.....and then I found myself unable to let go.

Stick around!! Post away!!

KUTGW!!

Hi, my name is Michael and I am a porn addict.

P.S. Never introduced myself like that. :-) But it is who I am.

Welcome! Though the details vary, your story is quite common. Keep on posting.