I'm back to the forum. Do you know if there is any 12 steps phone sessions which are going on at the moment ?

Hi Thump, welcome back!

PM me if you want to and I'll tell you about one of GYEs that is going on right now and up to step 2.

Hello Gvura, thank you.

Hello Dov, I've just sent you a message. I'm not sure it worked properly though. Are you the Dov I exchanged a few mail with a couple of days ago ?

Oh I'm back from my SA meeting and a lot of people there were talking about their romantic and sexual experiences. So much that I don't even know now if I'm normal to shun a new encounter. Being single, there's a voice in my head that says that it would be better to have someone to be with, even if it is just not to be alone. But...I cannot both do Techouva and do any old thing.

It is a most hard period.

Did you say that at the meeting?

Thump wrote on 08 Nov 2012 22:00:


I'd like to ask you just to be sure: are these SA meetings, or SAA (sexual addicts anonymous), or SLA (sex and love anonymous) meetings? Are you certain? Do they use SA's "White Book" and/or SA's "Stepping Into Action"?

And yes, I am the Dov who was emailing w/you of late. And I'll answer your question about 12 step phone groups here:

I am part of a group of GYE guys who are going through the steps al derech avodah rather than just theory, step by step with exercizes and sharing and plenty of time for questions and discussion about how it fits into living as a (hopefully) good Jew. We are up to the second step, be"H, and we meet for about an hour every Sunday and Wednesday noon to 1pm on a private number. Real names only, no silly usernames. We have a rather fun time, with good ruach some good laughter and people reminding me to shut up, occasionally.

PM me if you want to talk about it.

Nederman : No I didn't. It would be most useless I guess. I don't mean to change the atmosphere of these meetings. I just want to get down to my own issues.

Dov 》actually it's none of it as it is not an American organization. Its nearest American counterpart seems to be SLAA, however.

Thump wrote on 13 Nov 2012 19:25:


Did you discuss it with your SA sponsor then?

If I can expand on nederman's point: sharing what is in your heart with your meeting - even if it is about the meeting - is exactly what sharing is all about. Open honesty is the foundation of all 12 step recovery. If they can't take it, that's their problem, not yours. The purpose of sharing your feelings would not be to ask the group to change at all, just to be honest with them. Do you have a sponsor, if I may ask?

But I can appreciate what you may mean here. If you are really uncomfortable with the group and what it seems to be all about, then why open to them in the first place? But then, the answer to that is to find a new group, perhaps.

You and I have been communicating a bit, and you have mentioned the meetings you went to calling them "SA" meetings. Yet now you clarify it is not SA, but another fellowship entirely. I feel compelled to let you know that referring to it as "SA" in your posts or emails sends an erroneous message to people about what SA is doing and about. There is enough misunderstanding already. So please understand why I asked you whether what you mean by SA is really SAA, SLAA, etc - and thanks so much for clarifying what's really going on, chaver.

Here is where to find SA meetings where you live, if there are any:

Sexaholics Anonymous International Central Office
PO Box 3565
Brentwood, TN 37024

E-mail: saico@sa.org
Phone: (615) 370-6062
Toll-free: (866) 424-8777
Fax: (615) 370-0882

And my offer for participation in our twice weekly phone group stands - though you will not find the actual contact info on the GYE website, it is listed on GYE as "Dov's Desperados".

how are things thump?

..think he's gone for a long while, now, ToControlMySelf...