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TOPIC: hello my friends.... 101496 Views

Re: hello my friends.... 17 Aug 2011 21:15 #115141

  • gevura shebyesod
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ZemirosShabbos wrote on 17 Aug 2011 20:12:

thanks Gevura for sharing that, it is beautiful and powerful

maybe i can add a thought to your idea
the Mesilas Yesharim says that the only real pleasure is enjoying the Presence of HKBH, everything else is 'hevel veshav niseh', emptiness and vanity. So in a way all the earthly pleasures are similar to the shops on Canal Street in Lower Manhattan where they sell Rolex, Hello Kitty, Gucci etc. but NONE OF IT IS REAL.
In our physical existence we have a 'menu' of pleasures. money food sex etc. but in truth there is a whole new menu we never saw yet. and they are incomparable.
so while some things have no counterpart in heter, this is all one big knock-off shop



(there is a concept of 'olamcha tireh bechayaecha', and shabbos being 'mayain olam haba', but that's a separate shmooze)


I actually left off the very end of the story, the Gemara says "This was his reward in this world, we cannot imagine what will be in the next world". Pretty much the same idea.

Gevura!
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends
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Re: hello my friends.... 17 Aug 2011 21:41 #115153

  • gevura shebyesod
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Tech support, a couple of questions about the forum:

What do the little yellow boxes under a person's name represent?

There does not seem to be a way to upload an avatar, how do I do it?
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends
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Re: hello my friends.... 17 Aug 2011 22:15 #115156

  • AlexEliezer
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Roll your mouse over profile, then click forum profile.  You will be able to select your avatar there.

I have a hypothesis about the boxes but I'll let someone who knows explain.
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Re: hello my friends.... 17 Aug 2011 22:18 #115157

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I do that and I get a choice to specify an URL or upload but there's no place to actually select the file/URL.
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends
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Re: hello my friends.... 17 Aug 2011 22:49 #115161

  • AlexEliezer
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If you're not getting the box (I get one) click upload an avatar, then click on browse and choose one from your mypictures file. If it's a pic from the net, you may need to first download it to mypictures.

Last Edit: 17 Aug 2011 22:53 by .

Re: hello my friends.... 17 Aug 2011 23:00 #115163

  • gevura shebyesod
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THat's the problem, there's no Browse button or anything.....
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends
Last Edit: by .

Re: hello my friends.... 18 Aug 2011 14:45 #115230

  • AlexEliezer
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Gevura ShebYesod wrote on 17 Aug 2011 23:00:

THat's the problem, there's no Browse button or anything.....

I get fill-in boxes that pop up for each of the three buttons. Maybe try restarting your computer, or logging in from a different one.
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Re: hello my friends.... 18 Aug 2011 15:14 #115242

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Gevura ShebYesod wrote on 17 Aug 2011 04:02:

. . . .I read that and I was hurt to the core. He did teshuva, and in the end he got the girl of his dreams and a fairytale ending. And I, no matter how hard I work, will never have what I desire b'heter. IT"S NOT FAIR!!!!
I was almost ready to give it all up. :'( :'( :'(

But then I thought about it, and I realized that i have the potential to reach a much higher madreiga. My teshuva can be completely lishmoh, with no thought of any earthly benefit. From that I found the strength to go forward.


Someone correct me if I'm off here, but it seems to me that maybe you need to work on letting go of lust.  You don't want these lustful feelings toward men.  It shouldn't be that you accept them and just deal with them, resist them, fight them.

Rather, give up your lust.  Give up THE LUST as a korban to Hashem.  It's not you.  Scream out to Him when the thoughts come, "I turn my lust over to You. I don't want to lust! Take my lust!  I just want You and a relationship with You.  And appropriate sexual attraction to my wife."

Letting go of lust is a huge step and takes work, and a lot of syata dishmaya.

Are you ready?  Take a deep breath.  You can do it.

Have a great day.
Alex
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Re: hello my friends.... 18 Aug 2011 18:48 #115307

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Yeah I agree and I'm working on it. This incident happened a while ago, when I had just committed to stopping and before I had even discovered GYE. I really didn't know that how I was going to be able to do it, I was suffering alone. But Hashem helped me and I found this place the very next day!

And when I say that I thank Hashem for leading me here just when I needed it most, I also am thankful that I did not find it earlier. I am sure that if I had come here when I was still mired in the shmutz, I would have used the site inappropriately, and then I would have never had a chance to make it right.

Gevura!
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends
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Re: hello my friends.... 18 Aug 2011 19:42 #115327

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alexeliezer wrote on 18 Aug 2011 14:45:

Gevura ShebYesod wrote on 17 Aug 2011 23:00:

THat's the problem, there's no Browse button or anything.....

I get fill-in boxes that pop up for each of the three buttons. Maybe try restarting your computer, or logging in from a different one.


Three buttons? I only get 2...

Ive tried it in IE8, IE9 and Firefox. Below is what I see.
Attachments:
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends
Last Edit: 18 Aug 2011 19:45 by .

Re: hello my friends.... 18 Aug 2011 21:18 #115357

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OK so I just ran a quick errand, and as I'm walking down the street I see ahead of me someone really enjoyable to look at. I caught myself after a couple of seconds and made myself looked down at the sidewalk, and slowed down so I wouldn't catch up.

I started thinking "It's not fair, everyone else gets to look and I cant...."

Then I realized:

1- "Everyone else" isn't even interested...

2- Imagine I was allergic to peanuts, would I say "its not fair everyone can eat peanuts and I can't"?
I have a special allergy that causes my body to react to stimuli that do not affect "normal" people. So yeah I can't do certain things because it will trigger my allergy, then I will get an itch that I must not scratch....

Just an example of my thought process, this happens 20 times a day.

Gevura!
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends
Last Edit: by .

Re: hello my friends.... 18 Aug 2011 21:30 #115360

  • gibbor120
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Gevura ShebYesod wrote on 18 Aug 2011 21:18:

I have a special allergy that causes my body to react to stimuli that do not affect "normal" people.


It does affect "normal" people. It's just not lethal.
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Re: hello my friends.... 18 Aug 2011 21:44 #115362

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My "allergy" is differnt than most people's....
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends
Last Edit: by .

Re: hello my friends.... 19 Aug 2011 13:22 #115417

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Gevurah i dont mean to minimize your pain.I think there is no difference in the street between what you call normal people or you after all my efforts I stiil somedays finding myself lusting like crazy.I dont think there are more men then woman walking the streets.
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Re: hello my friends.... 19 Aug 2011 17:04 #115464

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I hear what you're saying, Gevura.
I can look at a good-looking, well built man and say, "what a pleasant sight."  Like looking at a colorful tree in autumn.  I certainly can't do this with a woman, though I wish I could.
You can't do either.  That's more than double the nisyonos.
(The tree's ok though.)
Have a wonderful Shabbos!
Alex
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