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The mouse being honest

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A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.

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TOPIC: The mouse being honest 72959 Views

Re: The mouse being honest 22 Dec 2011 16:57 #129057

Dov OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 1960 Karma: 383	Me too, I hope.
	"Off the 18-wheeler and fine on this tricycle!", "I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons...and you are probably the same." Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 22 Dec 2011 17:04 #129060

gibbor120
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NEVER EVER GIVE UP!
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Hashem Yaasfeni wrote on 22 Dec 2011 16:49:

i think an issue with all of us is knowing ourselves and I have and still do try to figure out on what level addiction I am.

I'm not sure that it will help you that much to keep pondering it, but here is a recent post of mine.

www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=4821.msg128991#msg128991

The GYE Program in a Nutshell may also help: www.guardureyes.com/GUE/PDFs/ebooks/Nutshell%20July2011.pdf

Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 22 Dec 2011 18:31 #129070

ZemirosShabbos
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pass the compote
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an honest mouse wrote on 22 Dec 2011 14:32:

My chat with my partner reminded me that I have stopped doing that, so as soon as I got off the phone and I had a real personal chat with Hashem about this and the real issues in my life. My neshomah, lit up again and I felt connected and secure bH. It even lead me to dust off the cobwebs in my Bais Hamedrash thread and put in a thought I had about Chanuka. (Feel free to take a look).

I must never forget that I can always turn to Hashem...

thanks for sharing the good stuff!
a freilichen chanuka

Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise
~Inna beshem ZS

Give, Forgive
~Cordnoy

The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting.
~TZ

Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 23 Dec 2011 13:22 #129123

an honest mouse
Current streak: 13 days
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Karma: 6

It's been a tough week for me, after 7 great weeks of recovery i have not been properly utilising my tools this week.

Every day (with the exception of Wednesday) I have taken a step closer and closer to acting out. I am now going to be out of the office for a week and that will give me some space away from my mode of slipping this past week but obviously the work is inside myself.

Why is that I have started sliding that way again, what has changed this past week, what am I doing/or not doing that is different from the past 7 weeks?

I hope that in my week off I will be able to rediscover the connection that I had before and get back into recovery.

bH I still have 52 days clean from m*** which for me is an amazing achievement, but I have been sliding closer and closer.

I pray that Hashem will take me the way I need to go to get back on track.

Have a good Shabbos.

Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 25 Dec 2011 06:45 #129166

Dov OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 1960 Karma: 383	If i want to live clean today, then the battle lines need to be drawn back, not forward. Obviously you are not trying to get into trouble, but is there some way that you can live in recovery a bit more, rather than just worry about lust a little bit less?
	"Off the 18-wheeler and fine on this tricycle!", "I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons...and you are probably the same." Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 10 Jan 2012 10:41 #130439

Blind Beggar
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Not a sexaholic, just trying to be good.
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an honest mouse wrote on 10 Nov 2010 14:24:

Most of this week ive been feeling nostalgic and down, maybe thats what contributed to my fall on monday, anyhow, ive been feeling the need to escape to my old tv programmes and non-jewish music. I have not done it so much but i really want to escape into it and just have a day off life really...prob not coming from a good place...dont really know how to get out of it.

Anyways, on my lunch break today, i felt tempted to to go to the internet cafe round the corner to watch one of my old programs....nuh uh - red alert! thats way too dangerous, clearly a ploy of the addiction/yetser horah, so instead, i went and sat by a beautiful lake with ducks and colourful trees and had a nice a&w instead.

I saw an interesting sign: 'please dont feed the ducks! they have all they need in the water and bread makes them sick' - i thought - we're the ducks, Hashem gives us all we need and searching for extras that we want makes us sick. Please dont feed the ducks!

This was today's email. What a great idea. Thank You.

The Blind Beggar is a character in Rebbe Nachman's story of the Seven Beggars.
If I view a woman as an object, I am powerless over lust, but I don't have to look.
I can guard my eyes.
I want to guard my eyes.
I do guard my eyes.
Why do I say these four lines?

Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 10 Jan 2012 16:06 #130450

Hashem Yaasfeni	Right, the mouse telling us not to feed the Ducks, feels like its a mickey mouse/ donald duck : game here, but maybe the Donald Trumps the mouse.....(sorry ;D i couldnt help it...) So...if you dont feed the ducks (yetzer Horahs) then we become the Mighty Ducks.... :o ....Hey...whos that groaning...?...Wheres my chinese Gong......
	Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 10 Jan 2012 17:33 #130466

Dov OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 1960 Karma: 383	That wasn't so bad. We've seen worse. OK, a little gong, if u insist: gong
	"Off the 18-wheeler and fine on this tricycle!", "I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons...and you are probably the same." Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 10 Jan 2012 18:42 #130471

Hashem Yaasfeni	if it made you smile on a sour day > ......or on any day its worth it.... :D
	Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 27 Jan 2012 05:36 #131876

Yosef Hatzadik OFFLINE Platinum Boarder A GYE'er since 2010 Posts: 2986 Karma: 10
	*Yosef Hatzadik's Ha'oros* *Tov veyoshor Hashem al kein yoreh chata'im baderech!* Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 01 Feb 2012 13:40 #132139

Hashem Yaasfeni	I have just crossed the 100 day threshold. Baruch Hashem with thanks and love to the Almig-ty !! I have just prepared a check of $100 to GYE in thanks as well, in the mail today !
	Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 01 Feb 2012 16:58 #132158

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	HY: Gevaldigggggg!! KUTGW and dear AHM, how are things?
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 01 Feb 2012 17:53 #132172

Dov OFFLINE Administrator Posts: 1960 Karma: 383	Hashem Yaasfeni wrote on 01 Feb 2012 13:40: I have just crossed the 100 day threshold. Baruch Hashem with thanks and love to the Almig-ty !! I have just prepared a check of $100 to GYE in thanks as well, in the mail today ! Why punish yourself like that? ( :-[ just kidding, Guard!! :-X)
	"Off the 18-wheeler and fine on this tricycle!", "I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons...and you are probably the same." Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 06 Feb 2012 14:18 #132442

an honest mouse
Current streak: 13 days
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Posts: 600
Karma: 6

Dear ZS, thank you for enquiring! I haven't posted for waaaay too long. I'm just getting less and less time to spend on GYE, which is not great but bH, GYE isn't the entirety of my recovery tools (it was of course a MAJOR catalyst though!)!

BH today I am good, happy relaxed and content.

Unfortunately, my long streak ended about a month ago, I made it to 63 days (I think) but it wasn't the length of time, it was the quality, I had 6/7 weeks of real good quality recovery, with a few subtle differences in behaviour.

The last month hasn't been as good, but it has been better than before the long streak. There are a couple of fences that I need to sure up, but I'm not getting around to it. Therein lies the problem, I have to realise that suring up those fences is a priority.

Last Edit: by .

Re: The mouse being honest 14 Feb 2012 04:52 #132918

Yosef Hatzadik OFFLINE Platinum Boarder A GYE'er since 2010 Posts: 2986 Karma: 10	!הגבל את ההר - וקדשתו !כל מקום שאתה מוצה גדר ערוה, שם את מוצה קדושה
	*Yosef Hatzadik's Ha'oros* *Tov veyoshor Hashem al kein yoreh chata'im baderech!* Last Edit: by .