Gray Monday mood… woke up late, found my phone in the Nagel Vaser (BH it’s already working), didn’t have time to shower, and let’s not even talk about shachris. Got to work late and ate BBQ chips for breakfast. I immediately knew today was going to be tough.

To make things worse, my mentor is on vacation. He responds, but I feel terrible bothering him. Here I am, sitting at work, opening and closing tasks… it’s 2:30, 5 hours gone, and nothing done.

Till 26 days ago, a day like this would have ended with me acting out—watching a movie, playing a video game, or mindlessly browsing and acting out again until the day was over. Today? I’m trembling on straight walls… just trying to survive this Monday.

Could someone please bring a smile to this sour face?

If your mentor is okay with you bothering him while he is on vacation then reach out to him and if not then reach out to someone else. There are many people who are willing to help you.

"veTov La'Eynayim Lir'os Es HaShemesh" maybe go for a walk on this grey gray day

hollyari wrote on 18 Aug 2025 18:43:

Nothing done? Sure? Think about it again. You've maybe not made any money today or not done the tasks that you had planned. But you've done precisely what Hashem planned for you today: To become a Tzaddik, a Gibbor who is in control of his actions. You're great! Keep that sour face and move on... The smiles might come at the end of the day when you feel good with your accomplishments.

Last night was war.

A real head-to-head bloodbath with the Yetzer Hara. Hours in a row. After a 2 hours nap, I was too tired to get out of bed, but too rested to fall back asleep. My mind was racing, my heart pounding, my hands restless. I tried music, I tried podcasts, I tried distractions — nothing worked. The clock ticked past midnight, and I felt myself breaking.

And then came the lifeline. My mentor, R’ Akiva. He was on vacation with his family — I so badly didn’t want to disturb him. But when I texted “I can’t anymore,” he answered right away: “Don’t do anything stupid without asking me first.”

He started sending me a story, piece by piece, message by message, keeping me engaged minute after minute. Until I suddenly realized — the Yetzer Hara was gone. By the time we finished, it was after 1:30 AM. I was safe. Calm. Alive.

And this morning, I said Modeh Ani with more joy than any person on earth.

A HUGE shout out to R’ Akiva — my life saver, my mentor, my angel in the middle of the night. On vacation, yet still holding my hand through fire. You gave me a future.

Friends, be a R’ Akiva in someone’s life — you never know who’s waiting for your message at 12:45 AM.

And please, give R’ Akiva a like in the comments — I want to see at least 25 likes for the man who saved my night!