I’ve been struggling for so long. I just keep on coming back to this garbage, like a dog. I know it’s difficult, but I just can’t take it anymore! I wish I could go back to when I was young before all this started. I feel like I’m not in control of my own life. Please help me! How can I finally break free?!

sigh*.... welcome to the club kid, it takes a lot of work not gonna lie and if you look around the forums there's lots of good advice to break free. the main thing is not to give up and keep on trying.  Albert Einstein  says "the definition of insanity is to try the same thing over again expecting different results." well, you gotta be crazy to overcome your "natural" urges especially when the whole world seems ok with porn and masterbating.
my heart goes out to you...
good luck, keep us posted!

Oish I seriously feel your pain in your post. 
Theres amazing mentors on here that hopefully could help you.
Youll get past all of this together with us.
Reach out.

I feel your pain only too well!

Trust me you in the right place, lots of people with great ideas who have changed their lives around. Some have even gone further down the darker deeper rabbit holes and come out the other side completely new improved people.  You can too trust me!

Welcome to the warmest family in the world!

Here you will find true care, concern, and warmth.
Here you will learn that you CAN break free!
There are many tools here to help you in this fight.
There is the F2F Program, the Vaad Program (click here for an explanation of what the vaad is), and the book The Battle of the Generation - many have found this very helpful in reframin' the struggle.


There is also an extremely powerful tool of accountability, friends, and mentors, as has been mentioned, that has helped hundreds - myself included.
HHM - Hashem Help Me - is the mentor-in-chief around here. He's reachable at michelgelner@gmail.com.
Some of the other great guys here are Eerie - 1gimpelovitz@gmail.com, Muttel - muttel15@gmail.com,   Reb Akiva - mevakesh247@gmail.com iwantlife - iwantlifegye@proton.me minhamayim - minhamayim1@gmail.com

Keep postin', you'll see, the oilam is here for you.

Lookin' forward to seeing great things from you!
And don't forget, as always, KOMT!!

Hi everyone, I had a fall last night and feel terrible today. I feel like I can’t interact with anyone and I feel like I’m not really alive and just living in my head separated from everyone else. I’ve felt like this a lot recently. I’ve been pretty depressed and been struggling with social anxiety and loneliness. I hope I can get better. Do you think I will get better if I can quit pmo?

hashemlovesyou123 wrote on 10 Feb 2025 18:56:

hey, whatever it is just don't give up! what you described aligns with the way I feel when I fall too. sometimes though I choose to stay down once I'm knocked over-don't be like me. dust yourself off, you got this!

Welcome!

To echo proud yungerman and others, many have been down the troubled road, falling oh too many times.... The good news is that GYE represents hope. Hope to break free, hope to live a life of קדושה וטהרה, and hope to regain control.....

With wishes for your success in breaking free of our damned foe,
Muttel

My dear friend exactly 40 days ago I felt like you.  Now I no that it's not true and I won't be struggling with this my whole life    I might be battling it but it's not going to be my daily YH .   What was the game changer for me was calling someone and for the first time of my 28 years on this earth opening up and talking about it to someone that struggle d with the same thing as me.       Be a man make the call it will make all the difference .     Btw in shamayim after 120 they might not be toivayah you for all the p***you watched or all the mzl  cause maybe you didn't have the know or the told to fight it ,but they definitely will mon you y you didn't call someone to get help when ppl that care about you were willing to help you.            Much hatslcha my friend keep posting we wanna hear how your doing

Hi everyone,
BH I’m now 2 days clean! I’m feeling great and very confident I can do it this time, with your help. Please continue sharing chizzuk- it really helps. 

Hi everyone,
BH I’m now 2 days clean! I’m feeling great and very confident I can do it this time, with your help. Please continue sharing chizzuk- it really helps. 

HLY,
Welcome to our family. 

You the best choice of your life. This is the first step in getting your life in order. This is where you will learn how to live and how to grow. 
Its not easy, but nothing good comes easy. 
Trust me, i know exactly what you mean when you talk about Social anxiety and the sort. Lots of people who struggle with these issues also struggle with the other,. 
Its either the anxiety and other related issues cause somoene to avoid people and therefore they lust because that makes them feel good. 
Or the porn and masturbation makes them feel disconnected and therefore afraid to talk to people. 
In any case, i know what you feel for the most part. There is hope! I promise you. 
I was in the same place for decades!  I dont know how old you are, but you sound young..... You have a full life ahead of you, start living it. 

Read posts, write posts, work thru the tools on GYE. Reach out to others in real life or on the phone. YOU WILL GET BETTER. 

Hugs
ChancyHK

Shalom Aleichem chevra,
BH this has been one of the best weeks I’ve had in a while. It may have started out rough, but BH I’ve been able to control myself and get stronger. Thank you for all the chizzuk. Knowing I’ll always have a chevra here who cares keeps me strong. I just experienced a strong taava and BH I was able to stay strong. I’m going into shabbos with kedusha! IyH next week will be good. Have a good Shabbos everyone!!

hashemlovesyou123 wrote on 06 Feb 2025 20:23:

Welcome to the club of fighters! As far as how you can break free, willpower alone won’t cut it. We need to apply strategies if we want to change. As the saying goes “change nothing and nothing will change.”

Stupid question - do you have filters on your devices? Have you met with a therapist? Do you have an accountability buddy? What are your rewards for reaching clean milestones and negative consequences for messing up? Why exactly do you want to quit?

Hatzlacha!

hashemlovesyou123 wrote on 14 Feb 2025 21:10:

To quote r' eerie this best week should also be the worse one going forward! wishing you success from the mir!