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"Creepy" sexual attractions

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TOPIC: "Creepy" sexual attractions 5261 Views

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 29 Dec 2022 21:44 #390299

human being
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sleepy wrote on 29 Dec 2022 01:47:

in a vidui we say O' Hashem i sinned by hateing what you love, and loveing what you hate (vidui of Rav Nisin Goan ?)
it seems that desireing what Hahem hates is a sin.

Loving doesn't equal desiring. I desire a cheeseburger. I don't love it. 2 different things my friend.

I'm sick of the Un-scientific approach of today's medical and social environment.
we will never heal and become a better society unless we realize that all people are addicts. Any thing we do that we aren't interested in is "addiction" and medicine doesn't fix addictions.

Pain causes addiction and medicine cant fix pain.

Unless we heal our pain, and become truama conscious so as not to cause others pain, we will never be living in a functioning human society.

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 29 Dec 2022 21:47 #390301

human being
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sleepy wrote on 29 Dec 2022 01:57:

if everything is as you said, does the concept of evil desires exist?

Evil as in unhealthy/unwanted/negative? Of course. Evil as in, your bad for having this desire? Not at all. We aren't good or bad based on our desires. We are good or bad based on how we act on/control our desires.

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 29 Dec 2022 21:52 #390302

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Eish Emes wrote on 29 Dec 2022 00:21:

I have not been active on GYE for years, but happened to come across this discussion. I really appreciate Human Being starting this conversation. I wish I saw a post like this 25 years ago… I’m in my 40s married with kids.. Since my teens I’ve been attracted to teen boys… It was not until I was close to 30 and in a deep depression did I seek help and share with anyone my attractions. It’s now over 10 years and I’ve been through several therapist, been in multiple support groups, attend multiple workshops and many other recovery related things. Some of it extremely helpful and some of it not. Even the unhelpful things have been learning experiences. B”H I’ve grown tremendously over the years and in so much better place.

I wanted to make one point… From a Torah perspective a married women is just as assur as any “creepy thing” and lust is lust no matter what one is triggered by. If you replace attracted to a married women with child, teen, ect. many arguments would go away. Let’s use the example of a man who is attracted to his neighbor’s wife… Would anyone argue he’s a danger to her simple because he’s attracted her? Now let’s say he becomes obsessed with her… without getting too detailed… he can’t get her out of his mind… and if Chas v’shalom he would try to do anything to her everyone would agree he has a lust problem and needs professional help. Now let’s take someone who is attracted to his neighbor’s child. He has worked on his lust and guards his eyes eyes and thoughts to a point where he has no impact on his thoughts or actions. Who better the first guy with a “normal” attraction or the second guy with a “creepy” attraction?

Wow, thank you! You are so courageous. That will definitely help others have the vulnerability to share their similar struggles too.

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 29 Dec 2022 21:54 #390303

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Teshuvahguy wrote on 29 Dec 2022 17:09:

Sleepy, how does your karma keep getting lower? I never saw karma move so far so fast in either direction!!

Sleepy is the (self-proclaimed) king of negative karmas, don't strip him of his honorable title.

sleepy wrote on 09 May 2022 14:03:

i dont know what you said but i gave you a karma since youre getting too close to my -13 karmas and i am the king of negative karmas here , so adios my friend and hatzlacha!

We get only one chance at life.
This is not a rehearsal; it's the real thing.

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Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 29 Dec 2022 22:08 #390304

human being
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This is a very very good article to read about pedophilia, which is the most "extreme" of the desires we are discussing on this thread. The entire website can help those that don't understand what "normalizing pedophilia" really means. Hint; it means normalizing and accepting people. To those who would rather not see another post on this topic, I feel you. But I felt I needed to give a resource for those that would like to learn more. Or who need to reach out.

Normalizing Pedophilia is Cool, Trendy... and Prevents Abuse https://aboutpedophilia.com › 2022/06/13 › normalizin...Jun 13, 2022 — The argument for normalizing pedophilia, and why doing so will prevent sexual violence, not endanger people.

Please do not comment on this post unless you have read the article. Thanks!

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 29 Dec 2022 22:48 #390305

eish emes
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sleepy wrote on 29 Dec 2022 01:47:

in a vidui we say O' Hashem i sinned by hateing what you love, and loveing what you hate (vidui of Rav Nisin Goan ?)
it seems that desireing what Hahem hates is a sin.

I’m not sure if I understand your question, but I don’t see any connection to “loving what you hate” to accepting“creepy” attractions and thoughts. Loving what you hate means loving to do averios. That has no connection to attractions and thoughts that pop in peoples head. If the thought to speak loshon horah pops in my head and I stopped myself, it doesn’t mean I love speaking loshon horah. It’s using my bechriah to choose good. I don’t need to do say viduy simply because I had the thought. People are not malkim. Someone with creepy attractions is no different. I mentioned this in my previous post, but replace creepy thought with married women. G-d hates zinus with a married women. If a man finds a married women attractive do you think he should say viduy? He desires what G-d hates.

My story https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/343353-Eish-Emes-intro

Feel free to contact me privately for connection and support forbsw@gmail.com.

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 30 Dec 2022 00:29 #390312

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And I spoke with Eerie this afternoon. It didn't take him more than five minutes to determine that I am definitely not normal. (The fact that he still continued on may be an indicator about him, but who am I to judge?)

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Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 30 Dec 2022 00:46 #390314

teshuvahguy Current streak: 6 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 417 Karma: 24	cordnoy wrote on 30 Dec 2022 00:29: And I spoke with Eerie this afternoon. It didn't take him more than five minutes to determine that I am definitely not normal. (The fact that he still continued on may be an indicator about him, but who am I to judge?) Cords…you gave me my biggest smile of the day with that one!!

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 30 Dec 2022 10:51 #390324

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sleepy wrote on 29 Dec 2022 23:31:

sleepy wrote on 29 Dec 2022 22:56:

Human being wrote on 29 Dec 2022 22:08:

if there is an article that normalizes beastility do i have to read that too?

i really hate to bring this to this holy website,but for the sake of clarity, ...there is a fetish for dead bodies, i personaly dont suscribe to that,,are we going to normalize that? shouldnt we just call a spade a spade ? i really dont mean to hurt anyones feelings if they have desires for things other than an adult ( living)human female, i just think we should normalize the nature of a person to think or desire contraryness thoughts,like to look over the ledge of a skyscraper and desire too jump. but the desire to jump is unfortunately not normal.

After the release of a certain series of books and later movies bent on normalizing certain things, the acceptance and prevalence of certain violent fetishes has boomed in popularity. But anyone who gets sexual satisfaction out of either side of the equation isn't normal either. Although many people now engage in such things (And I say this as someone who still has and definitely has had and indulged in some VERY sick fetishes)

Off the forum for now.
My Thread (Not for inspiration, but for random bits and pieces of my journey, as well as the inspiring responses of others: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/375514-Enough-is-Enough
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Last Edit: 30 Dec 2022 10:52 by jackthejew.

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 30 Dec 2022 19:15 #390347

human being
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"if there is an article that normalizes beastility do i have to read that too?"

"i understand the concept of accepting someone ,why one needs to normalize and accept someone is what i have difficulty with."
"are you saying there is no such thing as sick desires?"

i really hate to bring this to this holy website,but for the sake of clarity, ...there is a fetish for dead bodies, i personaly dont suscribe to that,,are we going to normalize that? shouldnt we just call a spade a spade ? i really dont mean to hurt anyones feelings if they have desires for things other than an adult ( living)human female, i just think we should normalize the nature of a person to think or desire contraryness thoughts,like to look over the ledge of a skyscraper and desire too jump. but the desire to jump is unfortunately not normal.

Human being wrote on 29 Dec 2022 22:08:
Please do not comment on this post unless you have read the article. Thanks!

Last Edit: 30 Dec 2022 19:16 by human being.

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 30 Dec 2022 19:44 #390350

human being
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sleepy wrote on 29 Dec 2022 23:49:

i personaly think that i am not normal for masterbating or viewing porn, and i have no problem with that.

Exactly. Thank you for proving my point. You are normal as it shows clearly below. You just like everyone else i argue with, believ since something is unhealthy or not wanted, we are supposed to not accept that part of ourselves and instead cacgate it as "not normal". For you you call the part of you that wants to watch porn/masturbate "not normal, and others call other unwanted desires the same thing, not normal. Even though what they really mean is "unhealthy. thanks for proving me right. Because on this no-one can argue, watching porn is normal, masturbating is normal. It is unhealthy. It is not wanted. It is negative. But normal it is.

-In 2018, there were 109,012,068,000 videos watched on ___, – more than 14 videos per person on the planet"
-Today, porn sites receive more website traffic in the U.S. than Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Netflix, Pinterest, and Zoom combined.
There are numarous more statistics. Fell free to do your own research. but be careful, it can be triggering.

Let me ask you an interesting question. Do you think Hashem wants you to be "thinking your not normal"?
Is that helping you shtieg?

In other words, its for hashem? or is it for you to feel better about yourself? Why you telling yourself you not normal?

Last Edit: 30 Dec 2022 20:24 by human being.

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 30 Dec 2022 19:45 #390351

human being
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moved

Last Edit: 30 Dec 2022 20:33 by human being.

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 30 Dec 2022 19:50 #390353

human being
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cordnoy wrote on 30 Dec 2022 00:29:

I love you cord. Every part of you. The healthy parts, the unhealthy parts. Your normal my friend. Just a wonderful normal human being with a lot of life experiences.

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 30 Dec 2022 20:06 #390354

human being
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jackthejew wrote on 30 Dec 2022 10:51:

Human being wrote on 29 Dec 2022 22:08:
Please do not comment on this post unless you have read the article. Thanks!

Did you read the article? it seems from this response that you haven't. You are mistaken. Although I don't blame you. Many other people also misunderstand what "normalizing pedophilia" means. I'm not going to get into why so many people make the mistake your making. That's a different conversation. ---You are referring to "normalizing pedophilia" as 'normalizing child sexual abuse' When we say "normalizing pedophilia", it is referring to the person and his desire. Not normalizing child sexual abuse.

Id love for those responding to first read the article. if you have, my apologies.

Last Edit: 30 Dec 2022 20:39 by human being.

Re: "Creepy" sexual attractions 31 Dec 2022 16:37 #390357

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Human being wrote on 30 Dec 2022 20:06:

I haven't because my filter doesn't allow it. However, if you can show me that the overwhelming majority of sexual studies proffesors now will say that one who ENGAGES [yes, engages] in hardcore BDSM is an indicator he should seek help, I'd be surprised. Because it's been so thouroghly normalized that it's now looked at as nothing wrong to act upon either. Just sexual activity (actually violence) between 2 consenting adults. For the same reason (completion of the process of normilization) Trans- questioning youth mostly suffering from the social contagion are referred to psychiatrists not for treatment but to be put on the track of irreversible hormones and mutilation. As society goes through the normalization process, the thought then arises that treatment must be different, open, and accepting as well. From there the short jump is soon made to changing treatment into all-out acceptance of the "fact": he's a she.
Many of these same sex professors, it should be noted, have no problem with 5 year olds decididing they're non-binary. If they can make that dtermination at that age, why can't they consent to sex? So expose them to drag shows as early as possible. Then eliminate statuatory rape. Then eliminate molestation as a special catergory of crime.(These are all steps that have been pushed for by advocates calling for MAPS to replace pedophile designation.) I have also put up a comment on something that's been on my mind on this topic basically since the beginning. It's on my thread: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/375514-Enough-is-Enough?limit=15&start=30#390358