Welcome, Guest

Lost a Great Streak
(0 viewing) 
A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.
  • Page:
  • 1

TOPIC: Lost a Great Streak 373 Views

Lost a Great Streak 03 Feb 2021 16:15 #362627

  • tg
  • OFFLINE
  • Junior Boarder
  • Posts: 37
  • Karma: 3
So I was having a great streak of almost 90 days, when it happened, crashed down all the way twice in one night. Was doing so well for those days feeling like a great husband and dad, but now feeling terrible about myself and that it was all for naught. Any advice or chizuk?

Thanks,

TG

Feel free to email me at my address as well

Re: Lost a Great Streak 03 Feb 2021 18:08 #362637

  • gevura shebyesod
  • Current streak: 1248 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 4178
  • Karma: 505
Absolutely not all for naught. At worst you've gone from however often you used to do it, to falling once every 2-3 months. That's not bad progress. An occasional fall does not take away from the change you have made in yourself. 
Now put the truck in 4WD, scramble out of the snowdrift, and continue your journey!
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: Lost a Great Streak 03 Feb 2021 18:52 #362638

  • withgdthereshope
  • Current streak: 13 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Expert Boarder
  • Posts: 124
  • Karma: 13

Imagine you were climbing the most difficult mountain in the world. Imagine that you have done better than anything imaginable without ever having any setbacks. Now imagine that one day you trip and fall and then say, "Hey, what's the point? See I trip anyway?" Does that make any sense at all? Of course not!

But that's how the Yetzer Harah gets us. He plays this all or nothing game that never made sense and something we would never agree with if not for the fact that we are the ones telling it to ourselves!

You're a hero that has done heroic deeds. Please don't let yourself fall for such garbage that's being used solely to take you down the mountain you have heroically climbed!

Re: Lost a Great Streak 03 Feb 2021 22:18 #362651

  • Striving Avreich
  • Current streak: 2 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 216
  • Karma: 13
I'm sorry about that. I hope you don't feel too bad about yourself. I'm honestly jealous of you. Almost 90 days!!!! I'm only on 12 days. Please share your wisdom and experience. We'd all benefit from your major accomplishment! 
How are you celebrating your large number of days?
Last Edit: 03 Feb 2021 23:24 by Striving Avreich.

Re: Lost a Great Streak 03 Feb 2021 22:40 #362656

  • lou
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 430
  • Karma: 30
R' TG
I am not experienced enough on here to offer my own advice. However, I can share that those that know a thing or two will definitely tell you that you did not waste your past 90 days. This is a bump in the road. The trick is to figure out what caused the fall,brush yourself off and move on stronger than before!
Perhaps you can share some tips regarding how you did so many days clean.
Hatzlocha!

Re: Lost a Great Streak 04 Feb 2021 00:23 #362668

  • Hashem Help Me
  • Current streak: 2888 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 4042
First thing is celebrate your accomplishment. Look how far you got nad how re-educated you have become. You didn't hide and binge. So let us know how you celebrated.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: Lost a Great Streak 04 Feb 2021 02:20 #362683

  • Gme
  • Current streak: 3 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Posts: 10
  • Karma: 0
I have never gotten past much more than a month so take what I have to say with a grain of salt.

But for starters take a step back forget about what was or will be and just be proud of the fact that you were able to get as far as you did! After you've done that my advice is one thing I have learnt, which is that while the streak may be important it's just a number the most important part is the recovery mindset. Regarding addiction they say that relapses cannot be a part of recovery because it means you're going back to an unhealthy lifestyle. However a lapse, a slip is ok and is normal as long you're still in the recovery mindset and get back up, brush yourself off and use it as a lesson moving forward to learn where you have to be more careful and what you can do if you're in a situation like that again. 

Kol hakavod that you were able to get so far and it definitely wasn't for nothing, like Gevurah Shebeyesod said worst case scenario you're at least doing it way less now. The most important thing is to get back up and keep on moving don't let it drag you down! 

Re: Lost a Great Streak 04 Feb 2021 14:29 #362727

  • Captain
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 800
  • Karma: 41
@TG

You absolutely must read this book: The Battle of the Generation https://guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation

It speaks exactly to the feelings you're talking about now.
In the place where ba’alei teshuva stand, even pure tzaddikim who never sinned cannot stand. (Rabbi Avohu, Brachos 34b)

Great free resources:
My favorite book for breaking free: The Battle of the Generation 
https://guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation. Change your attitude and change your life!

Rabbi Shafier's incredible lectures on breaking free: The Fight. Download here: 
https://theshmuz.com/series/the-fight/

If you're only ready to try something small, check out an easier way to do self-talk here:
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/378128-Captain—Shtarkemotionals-Secret90Day-Challenge

Re: Lost a Great Streak 05 Feb 2021 13:58 #362804

  • tg
  • OFFLINE
  • Junior Boarder
  • Posts: 37
  • Karma: 3
If anyone would be interested in continuing the conversation via email, please let me know at TGrehab@gmail.com (for different reasons, it's harder to keep track through GYE and phone not as much an option for me), Thanks!
  • Page:
  • 1
Time to create page: 0.44 seconds

Are you sure?

Yes