Grant400 wrote on 27 Oct 2020 23:21:
We all have many different tricks and methods how to deal with lust in general. Ways to prevent issues or change our mindset etc.
My question is: What in particular do you do when already under a lust attack? What method works for you the most and is your go to?
Grant
Can you clarify what a "lust attack" is? Do you mean when I have the urge to seek, or when my eyes or mind stumbled onto something, or both?
When I am in the street and I see something, I know that I need to find something else to look at immediately, no questions asked. Then when the urge comes to have a second look I try to take a few deep breaths and think about what will happen if I don't look again. It's sometimes hard to look away but I won't have to look at the sidewalk forever, as with most things,
gam zeh ya'avor.
This is not very difficult when I am strong, but when I am in a lustful state or feeling down emotionally it's very difficult to put up the fight. When I am seeking, and then I see something, it's like "
mazal tov I can now feed this monster..." obviously makes it that much harder to look away. For this the only thing that works for me is to decide before I go out that even though I am not feeling my best, this is yehorah v'al ya'avor, this takes priority. It doesn't always work but nothing else has worked better.
As far as urges are concerned, in my case, I usually will get the urge to seek when I am stressed or feeling low emotionally.
I don't think the urge is necessarily to seek, rather it's to satisfy my craving for feeling good about myself or feeling good and productive in general.
For this we tend to turn to our tried and true method, not because it's the answer but because it's what we've always done. In reality we have to just get up and do something productive, until then, no matter how hard we try to fight, the urge will just grow and grow.
I have many project for when opening the gemara just wont cut it. Working out, reading, learning something lighter or a topic that interests me, spending time with a friend, spending time with family, and so on.
When I am triggered by something and I do dwell on it then it's like digging a pit and trying to climb out. once I am in lust mode, it's an uphill battle. It's just not worth it, it makes everything that much harder, makes the next little while torturous. I remember reading somewhere here something that describes this so perfectly. Someone wrote "it feels like I am turning in the whirlpool of a toilet being flushed, you know where you are going to end up and there is little to do to stop it."
When this happens, I need to grab onto something before it's too late. The hard part is that when we are turning in the toilet it's very hard to stop and think.
I don't really have a good strategy for this and in the passed when I ended up this far I haven't been able to climb out. I guess the trick is not to end up here. The main idea here is to nip it as early as you can. We all fall into the trap of "if I give in a little, it will leave me alone for a while". I don't really know why after all this time we still fall for it...
I don't know anyone who fell who didn't first give in a little. On the other hand, anyone who succeeds does so by saying no.
Wilnevergiveup
