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Am I really an addict?
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A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.
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TOPIC: Am I really an addict? 996 Views

Am I really an addict? 29 Aug 2019 00:36 #343214

  • dying4freedom
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How do I know if I am really an addict?

Re: Am I really an addict? 29 Aug 2019 00:43 #343216

  • dying4freedom
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I have periods where I can jerk it every other day and watch some really twisted stuff and then sometimes I can go a couple of weeks without watching. The issue is that when I get the urge I am completely powerless... Even if I subdue it for a day or two, it keeps coming back and impossible to fight. I know addicts generally do it more often than every few weeks but I was wondering if that part doesn't matter and if it's just the fact that I am completely powerless.

Re: Am I really an addict? 29 Aug 2019 02:21 #343217

  • Tzvi5
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ad·dict/ˈadikt/noun
  1. a person who is addicted to a particular substance, typically an illegal drug."a former heroin addict"

ad·dict·ed/əˈdiktəd/adjective
  1. physically and mentally dependent on a particular substance, and unable to stop taking it without incurring adverse effects."she became addicted to alcohol and diet pills"
    from the Oxford English dictionary 
Last Edit: 29 Aug 2019 02:29 by Tzvi5.

Re: Am I really an addict? 29 Aug 2019 08:19 #343221

  • jack123
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what difference does it really make if you fit the dictionary description of 'addict', if you are not in control of yourself than you need to regain yourself again. labeling doesn't change the facts

Re: Am I really an addict? 29 Aug 2019 13:05 #343226

  • Dave M
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Agree.  Maybe now, you can go a couple of weeks, but if there is no changes in this behavior, it can potentially lead to a more frequent and dangerous path.  

Re: Am I really an addict? 29 Aug 2019 21:42 #343246

  • ColinColin
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every so often on here, the subject "am I an addict?" comes up for discussion.

I agree with the other posters...it is not very relevant.

The key is to know that you can fall any day for the rest of your life, or stay clean any day for the rest of your life.
You do have control.

So learn what triggers your falls, and learn ways to cope when you feel the urge.

And better still, learn how to pre empt the urge, learn the situations that put you in trouble, and take evasive pre emptive action.

Re: Am I really an addict? 30 Aug 2019 14:49 #343256

  • stillgoing
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Some addicts binge in streaks, while some lust everyday.

Some tools work better for addicts, while some aren't necessary for a non-addict. To me it's pretty simple. Try to stop. Really try. Use the tools here on gye. Learn extra musser. Engage with others here about ideas and try them. Really really try. If you've done all that and still can't stop, you're probably an addict. 

Just a side point, being an addict does not mean that one is doomed to a life of misery. It does mean however that one has to be honest about who he is, take the appropriate steps, and not fool himself about half efforts.

Best of luck.
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Last Edit: 30 Aug 2019 14:53 by stillgoing.

Re: Am I really an addict? 19 Sep 2019 00:23 #343645

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In response to people saying "it doesn't matter whether you fit the criteria of addict":

Sure it does! Addiction must be tackled very differently than a classical nisayon.

(I believe the basic defining factor of whether or not you should consider yourself an "addict" is this: do you have control over your lust? Or are you powerless)

Re: Am I really an addict? 19 Sep 2019 03:38 #343652

  • sleepy
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very well put, the question is whats control , i stayed clean today , so im not a addict?
For an explanation on my choice of username and avatar see my first post

Re: Am I really an addict? 19 Sep 2019 05:21 #343653

  • GrowStrong
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Quotes from the Big Book:
"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when lusting, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably addict. If that be the case, you may be suffering from an illness which only a spiritual experience will conquer."
"The tragic truth is that if the man be a real addict, the happy day may not arrive. He has lost control. At a certain point in the actions of every addict, he passes into a state where the most powerful desire to stop drinking is of absolutely no avail."

No one can tell you if you are an addict or not, only you can tell yourself.

Re: Am I really an addict? 19 Sep 2019 10:12 #343655

  • Hashem Help Me
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In the beginning it is very difficult to measure if one is an addict or if one just has a very ingrained bad habit (which is most common). Although there are good therapists that can help make that determination, it is probably best to just avail yourself of all that the GYE site has to offer, see what resonates with you, stay in touch with some of the guys here who "speak your language", and get to work. As time goes on, you will iyh get to know yourself and understand your challenges better. Hatzlocha.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE
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