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A platform of recovery for Jews who find themselves struggling with addictions to pornography, masturbation or other sexual problems. Post anonymously about your struggles without fear of anyone finding out who you are. Ask questions, post answers and be inspired! Get tips and guidance from the experts who moderate this forum, as well as from fellow strugglers.

TOPIC: Tryin' 154608 Views

Re: tryin 03 Jun 2018 07:03 #331656

  • cordnoy
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"The semi atheist" post=93725 date=1295453242 catid=21
achi, i like what you write....

i hear what youre saying about not having a personal relationship with the Holy, Righteous, Mighty, Powerful, and Pure Lord God Almighty. The earth is filled with His Glory, Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah...i definitely hear ya on that...The Wizard, dov, hes been sober forever and a day..he swears that talking to god, like out loud and as if hes sitting next to you, actually helps in this addiction...part of developing a relationship with him that actually works...so i too am scheduling in a chat with god every day...like what the aitch, im already talking to myself...so i talk to hashem...lets get crazy with the cheese-wizz, as they say...trying to make him my private god, i guess...

and maybe "everyone can write his own torah"...in the sense that we addicts need to learn new rules on how to live life...we need to create our own torah in a sense...but at the end, youll find that the torah you write for yourself...its been right there all along...been right there in the torah of moshe...only we didnt see it...

i am not secular...not the way israelis use that word...israelis are major believers...even one who calls himself "secular" believes in all kinds of stuff...i guess you can say i have atheistic tendencies even though i absolutely believe in hashem the creator, in his torah, written and oral...but i always find it is funny how people look for meaning and religion in the silliest nonsense...take aborigines, for example...if it wasnt so serious, it would be stupid funny...or kabbalists...or l ron hubbard...humans are funny that way...

but god is there and he can help and he does help.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.
Last Edit: 03 Jun 2018 07:04 by cordnoy.

Re: tryin 03 Jun 2018 07:07 #331657

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cordnoy wrote on 03 Jun 2018 06:51:

kosher wrote on 18 Aug 2011 15:12:
I was actually working on a kuntres on this subject. I was going to post it in "my" thread and hopefully build up my post count, but you were zocheh to get it first.

I see GYE (and to an even greater extent the whole 12 step business) as the equivalent of methadone to a heroin addict. It is not nearly as bad as the other option and it opens up a space of sanity and functioning to allow an addict to really break free. On the other hand it is itself addictive and to some extent even reinforces the addiction. To the extent that you need it, it is an excellent thing and is certainly better than the alternative, on the other hand, people should be cautious not to jump into more than they need and perhaps even reduce the amount of it (if they can) over time.

In other words, talking about lust issues (especially as explicit as SA) does not reduce a person's lust, it just channels it in an appropriate manner. [Perhaps I shouldn't use the word "just" - this is an incredible accomplishment.] This leaves the person as addicted to lust as ever, and while as long as he sticks to the program he is fine, the path down to failure is a very short one. It is a much harder task for a person to actually reduce his lust, but if one does so he is better protected over the long run.

it seems possible to use the 12 steps (and GYE) to break out of the worst problems and then use the sanity and sobriety acheived to totally break free from the lust addiction.

(So it seems to me, but I have not perfected this process, so I shouldn't talk what I can't demonstrate.)


I believe a program can reduce the amount of lust a person possesses, and it certainly can teach him how to react when triggered, or preventin' it in the first place.



Hmm, I'd love to see what else is in that recycle bin section...
I think I see why this one was trashed tho
Last Edit: 03 Jun 2018 07:10 by lifebound.

Re: tryin 03 Jun 2018 07:21 #331658

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lifebound wrote on 03 Jun 2018 07:07:

cordnoy wrote on 03 Jun 2018 06:51:

kosher wrote on 18 Aug 2011 15:12:
I was actually working on a kuntres on this subject. I was going to post it in "my" thread and hopefully build up my post count, but you were zocheh to get it first.

I see GYE (and to an even greater extent the whole 12 step business) as the equivalent of methadone to a heroin addict. It is not nearly as bad as the other option and it opens up a space of sanity and functioning to allow an addict to really break free. On the other hand it is itself addictive and to some extent even reinforces the addiction. To the extent that you need it, it is an excellent thing and is certainly better than the alternative, on the other hand, people should be cautious not to jump into more than they need and perhaps even reduce the amount of it (if they can) over time.

In other words, talking about lust issues (especially as explicit as SA) does not reduce a person's lust, it just channels it in an appropriate manner. [Perhaps I shouldn't use the word "just" - this is an incredible accomplishment.] This leaves the person as addicted to lust as ever, and while as long as he sticks to the program he is fine, the path down to failure is a very short one. It is a much harder task for a person to actually reduce his lust, but if one does so he is better protected over the long run.

it seems possible to use the 12 steps (and GYE) to break out of the worst problems and then use the sanity and sobriety acheived to totally break free from the lust addiction.

(So it seems to me, but I have not perfected this process, so I shouldn't talk what I can't demonstrate.)


I believe a program can reduce the amount of lust a person possesses, and it certainly can teach him how to react when triggered, or preventin' it in the first place.



Hmm, I'd love to see what else is in that recycle bin section...
I think I see why this one was trashed tho

Please remind me.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: tryin 03 Jun 2018 07:29 #331659

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cordnoy wrote on 03 Jun 2018 07:21:

lifebound wrote on 03 Jun 2018 07:07:

cordnoy wrote on 03 Jun 2018 06:51:

kosher wrote on 18 Aug 2011 15:12:
I was actually working on a kuntres on this subject. I was going to post it in "my" thread and hopefully build up my post count, but you were zocheh to get it first.

I see GYE (and to an even greater extent the whole 12 step business) as the equivalent of methadone to a heroin addict. It is not nearly as bad as the other option and it opens up a space of sanity and functioning to allow an addict to really break free. On the other hand it is itself addictive and to some extent even reinforces the addiction. To the extent that you need it, it is an excellent thing and is certainly better than the alternative, on the other hand, people should be cautious not to jump into more than they need and perhaps even reduce the amount of it (if they can) over time.

In other words, talking about lust issues (especially as explicit as SA) does not reduce a person's lust, it just channels it in an appropriate manner. [Perhaps I shouldn't use the word "just" - this is an incredible accomplishment.] This leaves the person as addicted to lust as ever, and while as long as he sticks to the program he is fine, the path down to failure is a very short one. It is a much harder task for a person to actually reduce his lust, but if one does so he is better protected over the long run.

it seems possible to use the 12 steps (and GYE) to break out of the worst problems and then use the sanity and sobriety acheived to totally break free from the lust addiction.

(So it seems to me, but I have not perfected this process, so I shouldn't talk what I can't demonstrate.)


I believe a program can reduce the amount of lust a person possesses, and it certainly can teach him how to react when triggered, or preventin' it in the first place.



Hmm, I'd love to see what else is in that recycle bin section...
I think I see why this one was trashed tho

Please remind me.


I take it back.
I don't think it's correct. But I also don't think that's a reason for it to be trashed. (for all I know it was trashed for an entirely different reason)

Re: tryin 15 Jun 2018 02:47 #332250

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I need to stop judgin' people.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: tryin 15 Jul 2018 17:08 #333437

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cordnoy wrote on 02 May 2014 12:11:
GYE has just obtained an exclusive interview with HaRav Chaim Kanievsky shlit"a:

TZ: How is it that the R"Y shlit"a can add a new miktzoa to his seder halimud every year, and still find the time to complete kal hatorah kulah (bavli, yerushalmi, safra, sifri, tzetel katan, chumash mit da ohr hachaim hakadosh, divrei chaim, etc.)?

HCK"s: Same

TZ: The R"Y shlit"a is answerin' that it is the same way he was able to do it all these years?

HCK"s: Nods his head in agreement.

TZ: So then, perhaps I can ask: How did the R"Y shlit"a accomplish this feat the first year? Did the R"Y shlit"a actually think that he would complete Talmud Bavli in one year (besides all of his other sedorim)?

HCK"s: Humming

TZ: The R"Y shlita is referrin' to my song?

HCK"s: Nods his head in agreement.

TZ: One day?

HCK"s: Nods his head in agreement.

Tz: at a time?

HCK"s: Nods his head in agreement.

And in another exclusive of GYE, our London correspondent recently caught up with Adele, and asked her as follows:

PY: "Rumour has it" that you have been dietin' for the past year, so tell me: Why is that you can't lose weight? You need to "Set fire to the rain!" Don't you realize that this is what's holdin' you back from joinin' stardom like those other brooms? Why can't you "turn the tables"?

Adele: That's exactly the point.

PY: What is?

Adele: I keep thinkin' of becomin' one of those broomsticks and I keep fallin'. I will not be able to completely and forever stop eatin' chocolate cake with icing. It will not happen forever. I find myself "rollin' in the deep." Sometimes it lasts for a week; sometimes for three days, but forever!? I cannot do it. It just won't work. All I will be doin' is "chasin' pavement."

Amazin'!

Edit: chocolate cake with icin'.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: tryin 15 Jul 2018 18:39 #333445

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Share: I did two things in the past 12 hours that I am not pleased with.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: tryin 15 Jul 2018 21:34 #333450

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As long as you are not moonlighting writing twitter posts for Donald Trump I think we can live with it.

What did you do?

Re: tryin 15 Jul 2018 22:48 #333452

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Reb Cordnoy: You know the trick, move on and don't think back.
Al tabet achreyco.

Re: tryin 16 Jul 2018 01:07 #333455

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Eyeglasses wrote on 15 Jul 2018 22:48:
Reb Cordnoy: You know the trick, move on and don't think back.
Al tabet achreyco.

Yep, for the most part.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: tryin 19 Jul 2018 03:29 #333586

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CNQ:

"Women do not 'expose themselves' (in the summer, etc.); it is we who 'expose them'."
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: tryin 19 Jul 2018 13:48 #333602

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cordnoy wrote on 19 Jul 2018 03:29:
CNQ:

"Women do not 'expose themselves' (in the summer, etc.); it is we who 'expose them'."

because I feel this is important (doesn't mean you do, and doesn't mean it's correct), I will explain: People complain that the summer is difficult (which it can be), but in doin' so, they say: with the women exposin' themselves and such....., I believe that it's an incorrect attitude. As long as one is layin' the blame, so to speak, on others, or shiftin' it slightly, he is avoidin' the beast in the room, and that is one's own head, eyes and body - all under your control, together with God's as well. It is up to you to decide where to look, where to look again, what to think about, and what to do afterwards - it is solely on you, nobody else's responsibility, but yours - did I say that enough? So, in conclusion (and this is a mighty long post for me - especially as of late): Women do not expose themselves - it is we/I that are exposin' them!
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: tryin 19 Jul 2018 18:00 #333612

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I agree that one shouldn't use the fact that women take the initiative to get undressed to tell himself that his thoughts are put there by them as well. However that will inevitably happen when someone hasn't done his homework ...

Re: tryin 26 Jul 2018 00:39 #333923

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Switchin' topics:

As my life and marriage is chaotic lately, I even mentioned to a friend or two that divorce, although difficult to live with in the long term, is somewhat of an easy and enticin' decision for the short term.

And immediately after that, the followin' quotation from our greatest president's inaugural address literally fell into my lap:

A husband and wife may be divorced and go out of the presence and beyond the reach of each other, but the different parts of our country can not do this. They can not but remain face to face, and intercourse, either amicable or hostile, must continue between them. Is it possible, then, to make that intercourse more advantageous or more satisfactory after separation than before?

NowI, although it has no direct bearin' on my situation, it does however give food for thought for a sex-addicted mind, like mine.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads:
GYE Handbook | Gibbor's Insights | GYE FAQ - Thanks Skep and DMS123456789 White Book | Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous)

If one gives up at the first sign of a struggle, he is really not ready to be successful."
"Tryin' and doin' are two different thin's - tryin' is hopin'; doin' is succeedin'.
"The right thin' to do and the hard thin' to do are usually the same."


Disclaimer: I am not a cheerleader; B"H, there are many on the site. I am here to change myself, and with God's help, by some mistake, I might even help change others.

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: tryin 26 Jul 2018 02:44 #333928

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Ok. I thought I was the only with a one-track mind.
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