i currently have an 11 day streak and i wanted some advice/chizuk for 11 days...i dont wanna lose this streak!

Don't obsess so much about the number of days or worrying about how long it will last. Just take it one day at a time. The only day that matters right now is TODAY!

KUTGW & KOMT!!!

Gevura!

What did you do differently to stay sober for 11 days?

what do you mean what did i do differently?

Do you have someone to call? Get into one of the phone call groups!
It's really hard to fight this thing on your own, it's so much easier if you have support...

Daven that Hashem help you through today.

But I wish you weren't viewing this as a clean streak.
It should be the new you.
Does it feel that way, or are you just fighting really hard?

hey 5shekvow you were off a long time. nice to see you back!

Paint your knuckles red, because right now you are white-knuckling.  ;-)

then get to a meeting.

5shekvow wrote on 09 Feb 2012 14:48:

I mean that many of us have had "streaks".  I once had a "streak" for over a year.  It ultimately didn't help.  Once the streak ended, I was right back in the same place as before,  getting worse and worse.... until the next streak....  then getting worse... until the next streak (you get the point).  If the streak is just based on staying busy, or using raw willopower - it is just a ticking time bomb waiting to explode.

Recovery requires doing something.  I am not qualified to say what that something is.  For some it is 12 steps, live meetings.  For others it may be calling friends or something else. But, "hoping" that a streak will continue is not usually enough to keep it going.  It usually requires actively "doing" something.

What is that something for you?

5shekvow,

Just keep on guarding your eyes, reading Chizuk, keeping busy with whatever you need to do and forge on ahead. I found that constantly stressing about falling and thinking about it didn't help me. The key thing is to work hard not to take the 'first drink', because once we've done that and are in 'a situation', we're like blind men who can't see they're walking over the edge of a cliff.

And the other guys are right - it's a constant battle that's renewed everyday. So instead of thinking OMG I have to fight this for the rest of my life, the other way I like to look at it is OK I just need to get through today which is completely doable, and then repeat that.

Hope that helps!

BW,

DL 

 

5Shek,

Just want to share something I posted on another thread for someone in a similar situation as yours:

You're heading in the right direction.  Clearly you need to redefine your goals here.  A streak during which you haven't masturbated is not a streak of sobriety.  If you're still looking at women in any setting you're still taking doses of the drug, and are still drunk with lust.

True change, true sobriety means much more than just abstinence.  It means not wanting to lust.  Because you know it destroys you, kills your happiness.  Sobriety means that any time you are tempted to begin lusting, in any form, you immediately surrender that taiva, that will, your will, to Hashem.  You give up your will to Hashem.  You do what He wills you to do.

That's real recovery.  Real change.  Real growth.

It's just real.

Take a deep breath and try it.  You'll like it.  You'll be truly happy.

Good Shabbos,

Alex

ive gotten the impression the after 90 days it gets alot easier to deal with. And everytime i have a streak i feel like this is the new me and i feel like im fighting. Also, the more days i get clean the more i dont want to fall because of the previous days work and it helps me alot. i know the fight doesnt end but unfortunately it doesnt. but i can still have today...he isnt gonna win today...no he wont...

Here's something I posted on a thread "Additional Tools for recovery", which explains a little bit about the deeper dimensions of a lust addiction.  You might find it helpful--let me know if it resonates with you at all (actually you might gain from reading over that whole thread):

www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=4870.msg130839#msg130839

Good luck, and keep posting!

--Elyah

5shekvow wrote on 10 Feb 2012 21:15:






Lewis Carrol- Alice in Wonderland

Every Chassidic Bachur in Yeshiva Ketana has acted on the following piece from rebbi Elimelech of Lizhensk [in tzettel koton]



But it never seems to work... do you know why? Because the whole work of forty days isn't being done in order to work, it's being done so that after forty days they should no longer have to work, life is about work. There's no escape, no magic formula...
There was a guy that came to the ropshiyzer rebbe for a derech in teshuva, the ropshitzer outlined a plan for him for the next two years [fasts, sigufim etc.]. The guy asked, "and after the two years"? "After the two years", the ropshitzer replied, "vesti kennen alein", You'll do it on your own. What all thes bachurim seem to miss is the words the rebbe reb Elimelech writes at the end:


It doesn't end, never ends...

P.S. if tiferes shlomo and winnie the pooh short circuited the universe, I wonder what I just accomplished....  ;D

Eye.nonymous wrote on 20 Jan 2012 07:48:

ZemirosShabbos wrote on 20 Jan 2012 15:49:

thanks for the help e1...i havent really been thinknig about it so much and up until now it has been relatively smooth. and does the k9 filter block all websites? cause i have my own computer now which means i can put up a filter :D i want some basic websites...but yeah i rlly gotta put up a filter