Have you ever said something that you later regretted?
Were you angry or jealous and felt like to had to yell or scream? It's like we just can't help ourselves. And so we open our Big Mouth and we let it all out. Never mind how the other person is going to feel after you unload on them. Never mind if you tell them what you "really think about them" - and it's every little detail that upset you from the day you met them. So what!!
The sad part of all this is that we felt justified - and we believe in the popular opinion that you have to SPEAK YOUR TRUTH.
With your Words, you can create your own Heaven...or create your own HELL!!
Check out Bamidbar Chapter 16 Verse 32 – shortly after Korach rebelled and opened his own MOUTH and expressed his resentments and jealousies towards Aaron and Moshe:
ותפתח הארץ את-פיה ותבל
"The Earth opened its MOUTH and swallowed them.."
Korach had prestige, popularity, wealth, respect and most everything any man could ask for. EXCEPT, there was only one thing that he didn't have...Kehuna. With everything he had, he still couldn't be happy if someone had something that he didn't have! And he rebelled. He just couldn't ACCEPT or be content with what he did have.
So Korach opened up his big mouth...and guess what?! "The Earth opened its MOUTH and swallowed them..."
Measure for measure!
Let’s consider how this message speaks to us...
Not only do we use our words to put down those around us, but we also use our words to express our negative and pathetic view of the world around us - our Spouse ("she's fat”)…, our Family ("they're losers”)..., our Home ("what a dump”)..., our Community ("everyone is out for themselves”)..., our Job ("my boss and my co-workers suck”)..., our Leaders ("a bunch of crooks”)…, our Life ("it's not fair-no one loves me") and most of all...OURSELVES ("I'll never amount to anything - I can’t stop Acting Out!!")
We must admit that it's not just the words that come our of our MOUTH that hurt others. And don't forget...words are like bees - once they're out of the hive, they sting others - and you can't take them back. Sometimes the greatest damage our words can do is the WORDS WE SAY TO OURSELVES! Just like a paint brush, we paint our world with our Words - either we paint a Sober Heaven or a Living Hell. It's totally up to you!
In Step One of our 12 Step Program - “We admitted we were Powerless over lust - that our lives had become unmanageable.” Veterans in the Program all know that it’s not lust that is our problem…Bill Wilson is teaching us that our real problem is our Unmanageable Life! We should all see the simple connection between the unmanageable life and our Words. After all, by definition, an unmanageable life happens when things don’t go our way…the way we want them…and so we end up feeling Resentment, jealousies, rejection, neglect and more. And all of these feelings are the direct result of our WORDS that come out of our MOUTH or the ones banging around in our head!!
If you're like most of us, and we just can't say or think anything good about others or our life, it may be just because you're not practicing the Art of Acceptance - the most powerful Tool to Live in Recover...so let me share a little gift with you, and I promise it will bring you sobriety, serenity and forever change your life:
is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation - some fact of my life unacceptable to me, and I can find no Serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in G-d’s world by mistake; and unless I accept life completely on life’s terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my ATTITUDES.