From Darkness Back to Light
Yesterday I was on the verge of acting-out. Everything was going wrong at once. I posted my frustration on the forum and I decided to check my E-mail one last time before shutting down.
And there was the Chizuk e-mail with the article, "How to do a real fall".
I read it. I thought it was very funny. It was great to put a humorous perspective on acting out.
It made me feel how absurd it would be to act out.
This morning during Hallel I stopped to think, "Hey, what's the big deal about a new month? What are we singing praises about?"
After a few moments, I came up with a couple of answers.
1. The moon was just gone, and now it came back. We celebrate the idea that even from total darkness, we can come back into the light.
2. Renewal. Each month is a chance to start over. Really, each day is a chance to start over. "One day at a time," everyone knows means don't think too much about the future. Looking ahead at a seemingly overwhelming task can make you give up hope. BUT ALSO, it means TODAY IS A NEW DAY. You don't have to carry your baggage and ill-feelings over from yesterday. You can clear the emotional slate and have a fresh, calm start.
3. Also, we can to Teshuva and have a fresh start, all our sins forgiven. Lots of people even daven special "Yom Kippur Katan" services the day before Rosh Chodesh.
I'm starting to see, over and over again, that after these really hard days, the Tomorrow can turn out much different. Even better.