Hug Him a trillion times

by Chasdei Avos (See all authors)

A beautiful post from "Chasdei Avos" on the forum (after not hearing from him for a few months):

I am indebted to everyone here for all eternity, because bli ayin hora with ezras Hashem always, I have been clean almost as a whistle, since rosh chodesh Elul. Hashem should continue to give us all the strength we need.

Around Elul time I lost my job, and although I was not unhappy because I really didn't enjoy it that much, I got down and frustrated a lot. However, I spent a few hours each day writing and reading on this web site. Since then, I feel like I have broke free (hopefully from the menuval). I now see that I must kiss Hashem and hug Him a trillion times for giving me the opportunity to be unemployed so that I could spend time on this website. I davened for many years that I should overcome this particular Y"H, and now, (as Hashem always does, we just don't always see it), Hashem answered my tefillos by taking away my job, so I could focus on this addiction (which I never ever thought was an addiction until I came to this website) and now I see the Yad Hashem.

Part of what has been working for me is a complete ban on TV, no matter how clean the show or movie is. For me, just getting near a TV (with cable) is dangerous. So I have not even watched 2 mins of TV Bezras Hashem since then. The hardest is on vacation, where I always used to kick back and watch a movie. But I realized that would be too dangerous. Not to mention that the hotel TV's are X rated even if you don't officially watch anything X rated, because just scrolling is terrible.

Thank you all and thank You Hashem, and please let our struggles (not just our victories) be a zchus for all sick and jobless in the world.