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Yechezkel's Story

GYE Corp. Thursday, 15 December 2011
Part 5/5 (to see other parts of the article, click on the pages at the bottom)

An inspiring continuation/elaboration on Yechezkel's Story:

As I said in my first post, my life had degenerated into that of someone with a split personality. On one side I was able to present myself to the outside world as a frum, honest, geshmak, father/askan/community guy - especially where I live in Jerusalem where I was involved in so many communal matters, but on the flip side I lived a sinister life of 100% total internet pornography addiction where I needed a daily (sometimes quadruple daily) fix.

Again, as I mentioned in my story - the terrible accident that I witnessed that fateful day made a huge impression on me. I just felt compelled to react in a positive way. I had seen him sucking a candy and holding his schoolbag singing to himself and then - poof! He was dead in an instant r"l - the whole circumstances that dictated that I would be there at that very time were too freaky for me to ignore.

That very morning I made that life changing decision to set myself accountability partners! Less than an hour after the accident. I was unsure who to set as my accountability partners as I wanted the system to be foolproof. I didn't want even a tiny opening for a way back in to what once was.

My wife works for one of the mosdot here in Jerusalem and had access 24/7 to email, as did my father. I concocted in my usual style a very credible reason why I had decided to set them up as my accountability partners. I said something like 'I went to this shiur where the Rav suggested that everyone do this thing for the safety of your families etc etc'. Funnily enough - it made them more proud of me! They were happy to be part of their 'shteiging' son/husband's actions in ensuring that he listens to his Rabbanim. I told them that everyone was doing it now (if only that was the case....) and they should think nothing of it.

So, that was it - they would be aware of all my web activity - updated on a weekly basis. Very often they asked me, "What's this website guardyoureyes' that you seem to be spending so much time on?!!" Of course - I was able to play this to perfection into their hands by saying that I am helping people who have internet addictions lo aleinu! They were amazed by my work :-)

I'm fully aware of the fact that although I have internet protection, I still need to double up in other areas, as I know the Y"H will seek other weak spots to target and plan his attacks. Subsequently, I have taken on small added measures and restraints - nothing too difficult to maintain - that will assist me in being able to operate my life on a level of maintained kedusha and tahara.

It's a shame that this subject matter - and this website - are not discussed openly in conventions etc, to raise awareness that there IS a way back into the fold - a way back into normal frum lifestyle.

Everyone agrees that we cant stop the onward march of technology and the way in which the web has become a prerequisite for almost everything that we do, but what we can and should do, is dull its impact and tie its tentacles, so that when it has to be in the Jewish household, it's limited in its capabilities. A bit like a disabled person in a wheelchair - he can get from point A to point B, but he cant exactly jump on a trampoline and slide down the banister!

Just as it would be unthinkable to buy a house and not affix mezzuzah throughout the property, it ought to be unthinkable not to install good filters and webchaver/covenant eyes on a computer. This message should be broadcast in every single Jewish community, regardless of type or background.

See this related article that appeared in

"We Blew it On the Internet"

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