Hashem Paid me in Cash
I'm very excited!! What I'm gonna write here could be a tremendous chizuk for all of us.
Two months ago, I mentioned in my thread that my daughter did a blood test and was diagnosed as probably having a "celiac". The reliability of that test is very high; over 90 percent. But to strengthen the diagnosis to 100%, she must do one more invasive test where the pediatrician takes a biopsy from her duodenum. The results of that test are given after two weeks.
"Celiac" is a disease where the patient must avoid of eating everything made of gluten for the rest of their life... no bread, pasta, waffles, etc. almost everything is made of this material. It's very difficult, all the more so when dealing with children. So we did the second test and awaited the results.
During the waiting period, I prayed with a lot of kavana time after time in Shemonah Esrei, I spoke with G-d and told him: "G-d, I'm almost 100 days clean, I'll put all my 100 clean days on the one side of the balance, and you will put on the second side what you want. But I think that my 100 clean days are very heavy, heavier than the second side of the balance. Please G-d, give us a negative answer. You can't ignore all my clean days!"
Today I spoke with the doctor and you can guess what the answer was...negative!!!
(It doesn't mean that my daughter is absolutely healthy, but it means that she can eat everything for the moment, and that's the important point for now.)
My holy friends, I don't know what I would have told G-d if I wasn't clean for this streak. I probably would have had nothing to tell him, and Chas Veshalom the test answer would have been positive.
In my case, G-d "paid" me in "cash".