Couldn't Sleep

by RATM (See all authors)

With happiness and joy, I am grateful to Hashem for a blissfully sober day... I hit an SA meeting yesterday which was good... Last night I did something that was kinda weird for me... I baked a chocolate cake with my wife. After everyone went to sleep, I joined her in the kitchen and we baked... Now, I've baked before, but usually I'm not thinking about baking or her, really... I'm lusting... I'm waiting for baking to end and something better to begin... But lo and behold, we baked, we laughed, we talked and I had no thoughts or expectations of anything else, and we had a great time baking... a cake.

I also had an A&W moment (Awe and Wonder i.e. Hashgacha u'pratis). This morning I woke up at around 3:45 AM... I couldn't go back to sleep... I do have an issue with sleeping, but this time it was even worse... A month ago I would have tried numbing myself to sleep using my drug... But this time I looked at what was bothering me... I'm a layer and there is a trial I was scheduled to start today... I did not feel my client was prepared enough and wanted to meet with them more.... So I said to Hashem, "Hey There. So it turns out I'm getting worked up over work. I try to control everything and its nisht good (since we all know G-d loves Yiddish, I try to throw in what I know). I'm going to accept whatever you give me... Whatever happens at this trial, I say thank you... If I win, I win, if I lose, I lose... No worries... I accept what you have in mind... And should you do something sensational in court tomorrow, well then I'll go to the forum and post and 'A&W' moment"...

Well, I walked into court this morning and the judge got sick or something and postponed the whole thing until after Pesach! Plenty of time to get the client ready... It's gonna be a great day!