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My Yetzer Hara's Hesped

obormottel Thursday, 26 October 2017

The only way to describe our great friend Jack* is that his accomplishments in the realm of Gilui Arayos were of a scale never before seen by humanity. With technology at his hand and his unprecedented use of media, he did for Arayos what Hitler, Mao Zedong, and Stalin did for Retzicha combined. In fact, I don't believe they ever personally murdered anyone. He was a נאה דורש ונאה מקים, an achievement that his counterparts in Retzicha cannot be credited for. And while Hitler failed at world domination and destruction of the Holy People (despite his best efforts), Jack succeeded in conquering the world. Which teenage boy was not inspired by his hard work? Which marriage was not affected by his work that set the standard of what a woman must look like? Now he resides with his colleagues in Retzicha.

I would be remiss if I didn't mention the hard work done by the many masters of Avodah Zara whom I don't want to mention by name. החוט המשולש לא במהרה ינתק. With the trifecta complete, Gehinnom is truly a more completed place.

*Editor's note: the name of the infamous, recently deceased pornographer under discussion has been changed.