My life is a thousand times better when I am not in the schmutz. Since I started recovery a year ago, I am a completely different person: new job,
saying a daf shiur, exercising and lost almost 20 pounds, and my debt has gone down consecutively for the past 7-8 months. When we made the siyum on
eruvin and I started saying the hadran, I had to hold myself back from crying, mostly because I probably would not have ever accomplished anything had I
not started with GYE.
I would cry, and beat myself up to no end. I would apologize to Hashem, I would fast, try not to be alone with the computer. Nothing worked. One day I was desperate, hiding out in the library, afraid of my own self. I entered a prayer to Hashem into the Google search bar. And then I saw GYE come up on the search list. It was nothing short of a miracle. I see miracles all the time now. Since then Hashem has entered my life in a way more real than I could have ever hoped for. This addiction, for me, is the definition of a blessing in disguise. Thank you Hashem, and thank you GYE. You are my lifeline, the ground under my feet. I love you all so much.— “syataDshmaya”
I was a guy who used to fall multiple times a day. Recently I’ve been working really hard on myself and with the help of GYE I was able to stay clean for 6 months straight! I’m in a much better place than I was a short 6 months ago. Our first 6-7 years of marriage were VERY rocky. Boruch Hashem since I began working on myself with the help of this site, my relationship with my wife has improved immeasurably. She noticed the change in me before I even let her know that I was working on things, and she said so. That alone has been very encouraging to me. Just to give you a picture of where I’m coming from, a few nights ago my wife told me that this past anniversary was the first time that she didn’t wonder if it would be our last.— “Skeptical”
I am a Rebbe in a small Yeshivah where I deal with regular frum middle-school age boys who have not had much success in the regular school systems for various reasons. It was recently brought to my attention that many of these boys, ages 11- 14 are addicted to pornography and hotzoas zera livatala. They view this as if it were normal and not even something to work on. Many of them do not even know that this is assur, and they couldn’t believe me when I said looking and thinking about these things is not allowed from the Torah. One boy did ask me how he would be able to sustain from this when he feels very bored and doesn’t have enough to do to fill his free time, and pornography is an easy time consumer. Another boy said he used it as a way to fall asleep at night. An additional problem is, that most of these boys have iPod touches or other devices with Wifi, so that having blockers on their computer wouldn’t really solve their problem. Others are very savvy and can break - in their own words - “any block” on a computer.”— A Rebbe in a vibrant Jewish community
I am a Rov, Posek, Magid Shiur and Mechaber Sfarim. I have many talmidim. I have been unsuccessfully battling this problem for at least 40 years. I read thoroughly the GYE handbook and would like to make the author my Rebbe. “K’mayim karim al nefesh ayefoh”, this masterpiece has re-instilled a hope within me that maybe I can really be what my talmidim think I am. I pour out my heart to the Aibishter that one day I’ll be able to help you rather than enlisting your help. I wish there were words to convey the magnitude of my bracha to you, for your hatzlacha is the hatzlocha of Klal Yisrael.— An anonymous Rabbi
I was addicted for twelve years, always looking out and wondering who can help me. A few months ago I came across your site. When I started to see all this great information, I became glued for hours. I must say, that since then I have not fallen B”H. I now feel greater then ever. You are far more than an organization; to me you are like a Hashem’s hospital.”— Chanoch
I am a prestigious mechanech and respected marriage counselor. I helped a lot of Bachurim and couples in their own sexual problems. But as chazal say “ain chovish matir atzmoh”, I can’t be in command of myself at all. If you would know who the writer is you would weep for weeks. I can’t tolerate it any longer. Do you think I can be helped without blowing my secret? [4 months later he writes:] You can not visualize the effect that GYE has had on my life. Since I joined the forum my life has simply changed for the better like a turtle slowly (actually rapidly) emerging from his shell. Starting to live a lively life, a life of control and reason. To understand myself, and the others around me. I opened my eyes, grasped my deterring situation, and made a swift U-turn. WOW!! One hundred twenty five days since I joined the forum. 125 days ago I was reborn. Right, I consider myself an infant of 4 months old. I watch my soul growing daily, as a kid would regularly appraise his height. My Davening has not been with such devotion for a very long time. The learning has become superior, since the tranquility of my conscious. My kith and kin have never been closer to me, than the last few months. And the list goes on and on.— Anonymous Mechanech
“I remember that when I was a child I had a very close relationship with Hashem. But in my twenties I needed proof. So I told Him, “I’m not going to believe in ANYthing. If you’re for real, show me.” Looking back, I can see so many ways He showed me - but I missed them all. Then I became a lust freak. I ended up in jail as a result, multiple failed marriages, and alienated from my daughter. So I slowly started doing T’shuvah. But my lust addiction never gave me rest... I’d still have marathon sessions of self-destructive, lust related behaviors. Then, purely by accident (read hashgacha pratis) I found this site. I just did 120 days clean B”H. But what’s most important here, is that my skepticism was finally laid to rest through this clean streak. With the help of the guys here on the site and the very real experience of Hashem’s hand holding me safe, I have the real, palpable, experience, in a most personal way, of His presence and reality. Not all the time, of course, but proof that I can no more deny than the fact that I’m typing this to you. I hit bottom from bottom, and I would probably be dead by now if it hadn’t been for Guard Your Eyes. Thank you again and again.— An Anonymous Therapist
Looking back to where I was 3 yrs ago, I can’t believe what I’ve achieved in terms of my thoughts and where I used to go late at night on the internet. I am unrecognizable now, B”H, and can almost say I’ve conquered this problem. The fact I’ve come this far is complete testimony to what you have done for me alone - let alone the thousands of other people whom you have helped.” — Ahron
I have benefited professionally and personally from your network, for over 17 months. Almost as soon as I started receiving the daily e-mails, I stopped looking at porn sites and the like.— A Neuroscientist in Israel
I’ve been struggling with shmutz since I was about thirteen.I found gye when I was nineteen and became an active member until I left to start learning in Israel. I have now been clean for over a year and would like to try to help others.— “In A Struggle”
I want to thank you; this website is a lifesaver for my husband. And with the new support for spouses, I think it will be a life-saver for me also.— A Wife
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