remember to take down your sukkah before it snows

ZemirosShabbos wrote:


I get the hint. Life has certainly been interesting and busy lately. Boruch Hashem despite a number of different trips to Hospitals and doctors for various reasons these past few months, my family and I are Boruch Hashem alive and healthy. Thank You Hashem for that.
My good friend who shall remain nameless send me a post from MBJ about acceptance and it was a reminder wake-up call. I have been fantasizing a lot lately (about the wife) and its leads to nothing but disappointments and frustration. Whereas acceptance leads to peace and normal living.
Thank You Hashem for all of the brocha in my life and for a wonderful group of friends.
The sukkah is down already, one of the perks of having grown children, although at the same time there is no money left in the bank. So its a tradeoff.

next year your kids should take down the sukkah for free

it's great to hear from you
i identify with a lot of what you wrote. the need for acceptance, the fantasizing, the lack of money. good wonderful nameless friends. (how about ZalmanBoruchItcheChaimYonason?)
keep on trucking.

ZemirosShabbos wrote:

You want another "Male Protagonists" Zems?

just for the record, the nameless friend UAJ meant was me. lest you think he meant any female protagonists. but i do welcome any and all of your literary creations, which are known for their high fiber content and nutritional value. but we better stop hijacking UAJ's thread or he will come after us with a shotgun. maybe

I'll make it real quick then:

Zalman, Boruch, Itche and Chaim Yonason walk into a bar. Zalman orders a beer, Boruch orders a Absolut and Cran, Double-Short, Itche orders a Tanqueray and Tonic Single-Tall, Chaim Yonason looks the bartender in the eye and asks for

Thoughts on Parshas Lech Lecha

I saw the following story this morning and I was wondering what lesson is there in it.




The Torah concludes last week's Parsha by stating that וימת תרח בחרן. Rashi explains that Terach had not really died, he was just legally dead in the eyes of the Torah. לפיכך קראו הכתוב מת שהרשעים אף בחייהם קרויים מתים. Yet, let say this legally dead person wants to come back to life. In the United States it appears he cannot. But the Torah is different. Hashem gave us a gift called Teshuva and it allows us to be Mechaya ourselves. Indeed, the Torah tells us that this is precisely what happened with Terach. The Torah tells us in this week's parsha that Hashem promised Avrohom ואתה תבוא אל אבותיך בשלום, explains Rashi Hashem informed Avrohom that Terach his father did teshuva. He may have been legally dead before but he did Teshuva and now he's alive again.
Most of us came here because we had overdosed ourselves on a drug called lust and we may have killed ourselves from it. But one can come back from the dead. We just can't let the opportunity slip our grasp.
Thank You Hashem for giving me the opportunity to come back, please help me live up to that potential. A wonderful Shabbos to all.

Thoughts on Parshas Lech Lecha and Vayera

After there was a disagreement between the shepards of Avraham and Lot, Avraham informed Lot that they had to part ways. The Torah tells us that וישא לוט את עיניו וירא את כל ככר הירדן. The Midrash explains that the entire פסוק is an allusion to עריות. In other words what לוט saw was the ability to engage his lustful desires. But, what is interesting is that לוט doesn't go straight to סדום. Instead, the Torah tells us ויאהל עד סדום. Many if us know this feeling, we want to fulfill our תאוה but the guilt element kicks in, so we don't go all the way. We just go up to the line ״עד סדום״. Inevitably however there is no going up to the line. Because once you go to test the line, you've already crossed it. So the next thing we find about לוט is והוא ישב בסדום. He was in סדם. Once we've tasted סדם it's now even harder to extract ourselves. As a result, even after Hashem saves לוט from סדום what do we find, not only can לוט no longer extract himself but he׳s even more enmeshed in סדם. Thus, the next time we learn about לוט we find ולוט ישב בשער סדום which Rashi explains אותו היום מנוהו שופט עליהם. Now he was not simply a resident of סדום but a leader. But it gets worse. Hashem saves him again. לוט has thoughts if regrets. He wants to get as far away from סדום as possible. Thus, לוט did not want to stay in צוער because as Rashi explains לפי שהיתה קרובה לסדום. It was too close to the ways of סדום. Unfortunately however we can get סדום so engrained in ourselves that we can bring סדום within us. As the Torah tells us ותשכב את אביה and שבקומה ידע ואף על פי כן לא נשמר ליל שני מלשתות. How does one come to the point that even while attempting to run away from סדום they can knowingly do a מעשה סדום? It starts with ויאהל עד סדום. An "innocent" look is all it takes. Hashem watch over us please from that first "innocent" click.

wow. thats a moiredige shtickel!
thank you

somewhat on a similar line, i saw yesterday in Toras Yashar, Lot was nichshal with his daughters possibly because he was ready to give them away for licentious purposes when the people of Sdom came searching for his guests.

Reb Matisyahu Solomon שליט״א said an important vort at the Agudah Convention last night. He said many of us have a misconception about what בחירה means. Most translate it is a free will the ability to do what I want. He said that is a mistake. The possuk says ומותר האדם מן הבהמה אין If בחירה is what separates a man from an animal then it cannot mean exercising free will and the ability to do what we want since a בהמה in that regard is no different. A בהמה does what he wants when he wants. If man does whatever he wants far from exercising בחירה he is the embodiment of a בהמה. Instead says Reb Matisyahu בחירה is when I do what I don't want to do. It's cold and I'm tired but I get out of bed anyways to go and daven. That is when I am exercising בחירה. I'm walking down the street and there's a racy picture or a beautiful woman. I want to look but instead I do what I don't want to do and I turn away. I am exercising בחירה. For today let's try and be real men and do what we don't want to do. A wonderful Shabbos to all.

Shkoyach for sharing that gevaldigeh raayon.

MT

It's been a long time since I've been on the forum but as the following vort demonstrates the failure to live up to my potential is not a reason to give up.

Thoughts on Parshas Vayikra

I saw a wonderful insight from Rabbi Galinsky Zt"l which is very relevant to our struggles. We all know the Baal Haturim (even if we didn't know that it was the Baal Haturim who says it) why Vayikra is written with a small aleph. Explains the Baal Haturim that when Moshe sat to write the word Vayikra there was a dialogue between HKBH and Moshe. Moshe out of humility wanted to write Vayikar that Hashem happened upon him, Hashem said no you have to write Vayikra a term of endearment. Moshe said at least let me write it with a small aleph. Says Rabbi Galinsky there is a tremendous lesson here: in the quest for perfection, don't give up just because you are not able to reach perfection. Moshe could have said shleimus in humility requires me to write Vayikar the RBSO doesn't want so I'm done. Instead he said let me strive for less than perfect, and he asked Hashem let me write a small aleph and in this he succeeded.
Rav Galinsky reinforced this with an incident involving the Chofetz Chaim. The Chofetz Chaim once met a former prized talmud who was now engaged in business and who the Chofetz Chaim knew was no longer kovaya itim. In response to Chofetz Chaim's inquiry as to why he didn't devote at least a little time to Torah study the person responded that it was the Chofetz Chaim's fault; it was the Chofetz Chaim who had arranged for such a wonderful maggid shuir like Reb Naftoli Trop who taught them to navigate through the Yam Hatulmid delving into every facet and detail. As a result, when he first sat down to the Daf yomi shuir in his local shul he was appalled since they were obviously fooling themselves in thinking they knew the Gemara. How can one breeze through a daf of gemara in a mere hour. And, since he didn't have time to delve into the sugya he devoted no time to learning because he obviously could not devote an hour to something that was not "real" learning.
The Chofetz Chaim smiled and responded with a moshel. There was a man who worked hard all week. Shabbos came he still had no rest since he had to tend to his family responsibilities. The one pleasure in life he had was Erev Shabbos he would go to the bathhouse relax in the shvitz and then go into the cold mikveh to cool down. There came a point where he wasn't feeling well and he went to the doctor who told him he had a heart problem and he would have to make certain changes. The person said whatever it is don't take away from me the shvitz. The doctor said that's the first thing you can't do. You go there you're a dead man (although Reb Galinsky sticks in the doctor offered his patient the consolation that it is a good sign for a person to die on Erev Shabbos). The man was devastated. One week passed, two weeks passed he restrained himself, the third week he couldn't take it and he went into the shvitz. Sure enough as the doctor predicted he immediately started to feel faint. With his last strength he ran to go into the cold mikveh to cool off. But alas the cool mikveh this week was completely empty. Someone seeing this ran and brought him a small bowl of cold water to cool off his face. He looked at the small bowl of water and said a bowl, I go into the an entire mikveh, I don't need a bowl of water. The person responded don't be an idiot, an entire mikveh is the ideal but if you are dying you take what you can get.
Concluded the Chofetz Chaim, the Torah is compared to water. We need to submerge ourselves completely into the waters of Torah but if we don't have a mikveh of water at least take the bowl and revive yourself as best you can.
Often times in our own struggle we cannot reach perfection but a little aleph we all have it in our power to do. You've slipped, maybe you even fell, one time even a hundred times, it's not over. It just means that you won't have achieved 100% even Moshe Rabeinu didn't achieve that, but what he taught us is that you don't give up take at least a little bowl of water and revive yourself.
Thank You Hashem for everything You have given us until now may we continue to merit your protection.

I like that, thanks Chaver. The best part for me is that the CC smiled. He (I believe) knew that this was sweet. The idea that a man walks away from the shiur knowing he did a poor job compared to what is best - that is so precious!! I neither need nor want a cheilek in the nechomah that comes from needing to pretend I ever do a perfect job. Humble, undeserving, honest service of Hashem is so much more fun than the old romantic struggle for madreigos, anyway!

You understand.

Thoughts on Parshas Tazria

There is a unique Rashi in this week's parsha. Rashi on the words ועמק אין מראה says לא ידעתי פרושו. I don't understand how to explain it. I know of Rabbeim who make their class memorize this Rashi. Since there is a fundamental lesson in it. We don't have answers or explanations for everything no matter how great we are. I was thinking that perhaps the Torah taught us this lesson particularly here. One of the root causes of lashon hora is a lack of הכרת הטוב. The person whose נגע requires הסגיר is one who has a בהרת לבנה but the מראה is not עמוק from the white which Rashi says is unexplainable since it flies against the laws of nature. Perhaps the Torah is sending a message to this person on what to contemplate during his seven days of הסגיר: not everything is for us to understand. Sometimes we need to just be thankful for what we have and not try to understand what we don't have.
Thank you Hashem for all the goodness you've given me. Please help me appreciate it all.

Wow, that was gorgeous, chaver. Thanks. I am proud to consider you a friend and remember our times working together 'back in the day'.

The thought I keep coming back to in this parsha is that when the tzora'as covers the entire body, the yid is tahor - but "on the day that an area of flesh develops (an area w/o tzora'as on it), he is tomei" and sent out of the camp.

Why? Isn't a little flesh progress towards teshuvah/cleaning up of the tzora'as? Why punish progress? And why is complete tzara'as tahor at all?!

OK, so Dovid Hamelech says a funny thing to Hashem in Tehilim. He seeks to get close to Him so he says, "From my head to my foot I am full of blemishes (literally, 'there is no unblemished area')". That's a way to ask for His pity? Very strange sounding.

But the idea is the same as right here, and exactly parallel to the program's 1st step:

Yes, the normal derech of living is certainly the one personified in Mesilas Yeshorim that so many newbies here harp on over and over: We are in a battle - the great battle - and stand in the middle of a great question. Sin and lose and draw the world down with you, or overcome and win the reward while uplifting the world...etc.

But there comes a time (or times) in even a normal person's life (certainly in an addict's life!) when that is not the derech. What is required is surrender. That time is when we see we are completely undeserving, that whatever we do is imperfect, that we cannot be zocheh baDin at all. It is time to surrender and say to Him the truth: "From my head to my toes I am a mess, and You know this so well, dear G-d! You are my only hope and I throw myself onto You in complete expectation of Your mercy. I love You, Tatty."

In other words, there is a type of metzorah who is covered from head to toe with tzora'as. As long as he is recognized to be hopelessly covered - he is tahor.

"But on the day that an area of un-tzora'as flesh appears" - that is, as soon as he starts to see himself as making it on his own just a little and 'fighting the good fight'...he is tomei. And tum'ah is complete, there is no 'partial tumah'.

I am a sexaholic, powerless over all the outcomes in my life and certainly powerless to control and use lust. As soon as I start to see myself as 'making it out of this mess', I am a loser. I will step right back into His way and foul things up. As long as I I stay out of G-d's way because it is OK to admit that I am the loser that I really am - then I remain a winner.

Funny, but true. I love that thought on those p'sukim. And they have worked for me one day at a time so far, b"H.

Finally (sorry it's a 'langeh arichus' again), the psukim in today's Halel point this derech to me, as well:

"Pischu li sha'arei tzedek...zeh hasha'ar laShem..." means to me that the sha'ar laShem is sincerely asking Him to "pischu li" - open the gates for me. Who needs the gates opened? The one who is still standing outside! As long as I see myself as still starting, as still outside in some respect, trying to come into Avodas Hashem, I will be on the path of tzaddikim ("zeh hasha'ar laShem tzaddikim yavo'u bo"). As soon as I consider myself deserving of respect and madreigos or deveikus, i am suddenly nowhere again.

The good news is that this realization itself, that my natural gayvoh pushes me away from Him and that I so far...returns me to the humility needed to get back to reality and the sha'ar laShem!

Enjoy!