Hey respect! I think your courage and honesty will help you overcome any obstacle and will help even your parents to become even greater human beings. You did something man that shook the universe, that only few can. I wish Hashem will bless you with a wife that will make you smile every day. You have what it takes to be a good father.

So glad it all worked out CA!

Your parents have a son they can feel very proud of,
and this son should feel proud of himself!

Your courage and willingness to do whatever is necessary to  heal, and keep the door of communication open with your folks is truly inspiring.

Hatzlacha with everything

Wow. Gibbur = You. You're gonna be fine. Both you and your parents are amazing. I am kvelling right now.

KUTGW, with or without us.

Thank you everyone, my dad is going to shut off connection, pretty much my mom thinks that I am being WAY to hard on myself and being on this website is  making matters worse because i am constantly thinking about it an talking about it which keeps reminding me, and that if i take a break from it for a while things will get better, she thinks that mostly my por* issues are curiosity, i might have to tell her it is a bit more than that, she also doesn't think i have chronic procrastination, even if i do procrastinate, she says so does everyone else and that i will have to work at it and i shouldn't be a perfectionist because that makes matters worse, we talked about other stuff but this is what i feel i am going to say. But i am going to see how this all goes maybe i will be able to stay clean if i don't have access to the internet, and i won't procrastinate either! Thank you again everyone!

Your mom is probably right and Shlomo mentioned that to you a while back (that you may be too hard on yourself). Now that you have your parents on board, I'm sure that you will be able to have a better sense of reality (and you'll be less hard on yourself). You'll have a good balance!


Just curios, do you think that homeschooling is a good thing? I have Christian coworkers that constantly tell me how it is the best option but I always assumed (and argued) that one would be isolated because of it. You mentioned that you don't have many friends, do you think that it has anything to do with it? Also, do you think that part of the reason that you are so close to your parents is because of it. You really have a special relationship with them. I get along well with my parents but I would never have the guts to do what you did.


Anyway, better get out of here...


Have a great day and enjoy the new chapter in your life!   

Are we axperst? Heck we can't even spellexperts!

Look, your parents know you far better than you are aware, AND you know yourself better than theythink you do - both at the same time. You are both right about some things and wrong about others. Hashem will help you both out.

I have children all over adolescent and early adult ages and let me tell you: I wish that I could get them to realize that while they were busy in there own little (very very urgent) worlds, their mother and I were watching them grow up from vomiting babies, through first grade and eventually high school; saw how they were picking their friends (or not) - and all that from the outside as adults having been there ourselves. Our children typically peg us as much bigger idiots than we really are. And no one loves you as much as your parents do, unless they are psychotic evil-people...and that's pretty rare, b"H.

Love,

Dov

well miss you mate,

but everyone is so proud and you turly are an inspirsation...

well done!

just think in a couple of years time youll look back, and be freeee

Good Shabbos Everyone. Here's an update from CA that he asked me to post:

Hello, There have been a lot of changes in my life now (good ones mostly!)...as you have noticed I have not been on gmail or GYE much. A few things that i feel you should know are, that i now have K9 so that is very good, but for me it blocks GYE but they don't want me on it any way because they feel it makes me even harder on myself than i am already, they don't really want me to chat with my contacts so much for the same reason but i am telling them that mostly i talk with my contacts like i would with friends and that i am friends with them and that ver seldom do i talk about the other "stuff". OK here is the big stuff! I have also realized i was being WAY WAY WAY to hard on myself and that i am certainly not as bad as a procrastinator as i thought! and that i am certainly not addicted to por*! i am a normal teen who has hormones and the rest, I feel really great now i have been talking with my parents a lot about everything. some of the things i thought i was procrastinating i really wasn't for example when i would not drum i wasn't procrastinating it i was really just getting bored of it and i felt it was heading no where as well as having no one to share it with, but now i got hooked up with a kid my age who plays the guitar and we are going to make a band so
now my excitement has been rekindled! Also my parents turn off the connection during the day and that has helped my procrastination a ton! It is almost impossible not to one to do stuff on the computer when it is right next to you and the other option is to school work and i also i realize that i don't procrastinates THAT badly anyway and even though i have been crediting my falling behind in mathy to me working for half the summer i also always forget that i began a different online school at the beggining of the year which took a few weeks of the school year but we stopped it because we realized that we would have to work through all the holidays including Pesach! and my mom reassured me that 9th grade is very tough and that she also faltered a bit it too! lol! and that i can get back on track pretty well! There is obviously a lot to say but this is kind of the general idea. So no one should be worried about me i am doing GREAT! Thanks!

Thanks, Shlomo. Tell him we all appreciate the update and are rooting him on. Truly.

And frankly, I think this tells a good message to all teens, that these habits are a little less engraved in stone than for the guys who've got a few years post-puberty under their belts. I have no clue about definitions of when "habitual" behavior becomes "addictive" behavior, but I'm convinced that it's entirely "normal" for teens to struggle with managing their se*uality. And that it can be done.

In other words, no guilt trips needed, just get to work, and build yourself a good direction for your life. CA is a gibbur, and he'll do just fine, BE'H.

Hey,

I'm glad to hear that he is doing well.  ;D Please wish him good luck with his band. We can use some good Jewish music!

I have not been on this website for months and i dont really plan on continuing to post here but i figured it has been more than a year since i posted so i should update what has been going on.
Even though my parents dont really "want" me on this i do feel from a point of what i think i need to do this is important. over this past year i have had many ups and downs in terms of streaks my longest only being 36 days, there have been threads of 2 weeks or so but also consecutive days i have fallen. B'H i have not seen alot of porn but that does not mean i have not seen it at all and i have found one website that does not block it but i am really making a concerted effort not to be on the internet too much. emotionally i have been much more stable and realize that was a minore bump in the road and that this is normal and that it will certainly not ruin my life. In terms of school this past year was much more successful and hopefully next year (junior year) will be even more so. I scored high on my ppsat and have been studying already for my next psat and the actual sat. I have already been looking into yeshivas to attend which hopefully i can do in my senior year if all works out but that is REALLY jumping the gun. I really feel like GYE has helped to become a better person when i look back at my experience. If i think of anything more i forgot to say i will try and get on this K9 free computer again even though i try my best to stay away from it because it normally leads to my porn related falls. if anyone wants to reply they need to do it by PM so ocan see the message in my email. Thank You.

I wanted to chck in again and i plan on doing so every so often to get on track, i really think even if i only updat every few weeks (with out parental concent) that its best for me. i have been falling alot recently but am really trying to refocus and am on a 6 day streak currenty i always pring out the 90 day chart and it is helpful so i hope u guys give feedback cuz i really appreciate it! school just began its really going great so i hope to keep it up! alot of tests to prepare for college this year!

I have been browsing your thread.  It is very inspiring!

I wish you all the best!

Hey Chazak,

keep up the good work! It seems like you are progressing well. Focus on the progress and learn from your falls (talking to myself as well). Good luck with your studies!!!

Thank you, so i have not fallen since and i am really trying to do it one day at a time. i also think its important to keep prioritize in sight life has a way of getting chaotic so i read a great book called tuesdays with morrie by mitch albom which is a great book and it kind of helped me to think deeper and really focus. i had a hard time the other night focusing on keepingmyself from looking stuff on the internet but thankfully i did not look at any porn or fall so i made a not to refocus and it has been working. any time my thoguts stray i shake my i head literally and give my self a quick pep talk. listening to calssical music is also great music tends to block out bad thoughts if it meaningful. i hope to write again soon. have a good shabbos!