Its Shushan Purim and I am reading all your Purim thoughts. I just want to add a realization of my own. You write about Esther's predicament. I just thought how as children we didn't understand that Esther was not "lucky" to become Queen. Now that we know the facts we see how she was being violated for five years without knowing why. In fact when Mordechai heard the plot to kill Achashverosh , he could've thought that this is her chance to get out of this mess, by letting him get killed. Instead, he had faith that she's there for a reason and he went and saved the King's life. Amazing.
me wrote on 25 Feb 2010 19:13:
Yes. these words are a great chizuk for us. We don't know what Hashem's plan is for us but we must have faith.

Post. I am waiting for any one's thoughts. I have been thinking that just like the chofets Chaim has a vort on shmiras haloshon  on every parsha of the week. We should compile a vort on shmiras einayim on every Parsha. that way one would have a chizzuk every time he hears Krias hatorah

May we live at least a bit for Hashem today! Then we'll see how beautiful our eyes will be!!

me wrote on 26 Feb 2010 09:18:


Yeshhh.....ooooo yeeessshhhhhhhhh!

here's my vort for this week. it says after the eigel they rose לצחק and Rashi says it means גילוי עריות. Where do we see they did that aveira? we only know that they did שפיכת דמים ? Answ. its brought down that one of the motives for idolatry was to commit adultery since that became a form of worship. So, since the Yidden were trying to veer towards a type of idolatry that itself is considered adultery. The lesson from here is how much we must distance ourselves from this sin.
i had another fall. Very frustrating, > it took me 3 days to admit it :-[. I have 70 days clean and thought i was done. Oh well. What could you do? i am starting again and wish so much this would be behind me. i have been reading the attitude Handbook. Its very good and is helping me pick myself up again. :)

don't get bogged down I've been through similar situation's i had 2 stretches of 120 days and fell and i am still struggling. if you add up the days that you fell and the days that you were strong it will give you tremendous chizuk. it isn't fair to let the bad days have bigger influence on you then the good days, which are 70 to 1.

now that pesach is coming you could make yourself a goal sitting down to the seder with 3 weeks clean, what a feeling !, from there it's just a short flight to shavues with the yemei hasfirah and you have another 7 weeks in the bag.

thanks, but I always find that after a fall, i am so dismayed that I keep clean for a while because i know how bad it is to sin. But then, when I am clean for a while the YH starts to creep up on me saying, its not so bad to "slip" just a little, and before you know it I get seized by an enormous urge to check things out. Your Idea of setting goals that have some stretch to them sounds good. I'll go to Pesach, then shvuos, then tisha bav and finally the High Holy Days

It's not that it's bad to sin, it that it's so stupid!

Right on, Dov! Like they say, "here comes Dov and he's no dummy". i guess I am a bit of a dummy. And I always thought i was a smart one

It seems it's OK not to be so smart, as long as we are also not so stupid. Whatever we are, it's nice to be in the same mechitza as you, Rashky.

thank you, Dov. I'll need a strong mechitza from my YH.

Wow...sorry I didn't post here sooner. It becomes hard to admit that we've fallen when we have a chance to distance oruselves from this disease a bit 9and it sounds like you have), and in retrospect, we're able to see a lot more clearly just how crazy it is. So we're more embarrassed about our fall then when we were totally involved in it.

Glad to hear that you're picking yourself up and moving forward, it's the only way to do it! You're right about the yetzer hora creeping up on us - and you're making goals to fight back against that!

Try to figure out what you'll do when that yetzer hora comes creeping back, in advance. For me, if i know that the yetzer hora will come with a certain approach, I try to figure out what I'll respond before he shows up.

thanks for everyone's chizuk, yes it is embarrassing to admit a fall but i see its the only way to get up afterward. if one denies it then he stays down and can't hold back. Admitting the fall  is the 1st step. Now we understand why vidui is such an important part of the tshuva process. Boruch Hashem I  am doing fine now but i still feel a pull and I post here and there to stay away from any temptation. Its amazing how strong an addiction could be and before i found this site I didn't know that it was an addiction, I thought it was a regular habit to to this specific aveira. there is so much suffering, guilt, lack of control, and hence, lack of living when one is under the addiction.

FELL SHMELL

Get up!!

KOT!!!