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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!
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TOPIC: Subconscious falls 107 Views

Subconscious falls 15 Jul 2025 23:25 #438977

  • empoweredhippo46
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Hi,
I'm bh holding by 60 days and  bh keeping it up very nicely, the only issue I have is Shabbos (usually in the afternoon,) any ideas how to deal with it? 

Re: Subconscious falls 16 Jul 2025 01:11 #438982

  • justwannabefree
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Maybe get a chavrusa or set up something kevua that you do at that time? Kudos on the sixty days your an inspiration ... 



                                                                             yours truly jwbf...
"Damn the torpedoes full speed ahead!"- David Farragut, admiral, United states navy (during  the civil war)
Last Edit: 16 Jul 2025 01:12 by justwannabefree.

Re: Subconscious falls 16 Jul 2025 03:45 #438988

  • ches1
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Good job with the 60 days.
Ideally get a chavrusa and learn. 
Or learn by yourself. You can learn anything but hilchos shabbos is especially nice.
You could also go out for a walk.
Or do some reading; get yourself some good books to look at.
You can play games with family members, or even single player games (like thinkfun games) if you don't have anyone to play with.
You could also take a nap, and catch up on missing sleep from the week.
I also find shabbos to be hard, and not claiming to have an easy solution, but just wanted to offer some ideas.
All the best.

Re: Subconscious falls 16 Jul 2025 11:46 #438994

  • captain
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IIf it interests you, you can learn some agadta with Ein Yaakov.
In the place where ba’alei teshuva stand, even pure tzaddikim who never sinned cannot stand. (Rabbi Avohu, Brachos 34b)

Great free resources:
My favorite book for breaking free: The Battle of the Generation 
https://guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation. Change your attitude and change your life!

Rabbi Shafier's incredible lectures on breaking free: The Fight. Download here: 
https://theshmuz.com/series/the-fight/

If you're only ready to try something very small (recently updated and PDF available):
https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/378128-Captain—Shtarkemotionals-Secret90Day-Challenge

Re: Subconscious falls 16 Jul 2025 13:24 #438998

  • upanddown
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empoweredhippo46 wrote on 15 Jul 2025 23:25:
Hi,
I'm bh holding by 60 days and  bh keeping it up very nicely, the only issue I have is Shabbos (usually in the afternoon,) any ideas how to deal with it? 

I believe there are 2 reasons that Shabbos is more difficult.
1 - Boredom. For that there are some excellent ideas in the previous posts, like learning light stuff, going on a proper walk (I'm a big believer in exercise as a first aid tool for urges), etc.
2 - Stronger urges. I find that the natural urges are way stronger on Shabbos, especially on Shabbos afternoon after getting up from that Cholent-Shluff. It very likely has to do with the food we eat on Shabbos, which is often more fatty and heavy. And we eat until our stomach is popping full. What's the solution? I don't know. Just be aware of it. Maybe eat less cholent. Maybe drink more water. Not sure... 

Keep up your great work!
Much Hatzlacha!!
Feel free to share a bit about your journey when you feel ready... We're very interested to hear!!
My favourite resources:
1. "זאת בריתי". hebrewbooks.org/56572 (PM me for a sharper version)
2. "שערי גדולה". hebrewbooks.org/48344
3.  guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation

My journey: Emunah struggles, Celebrating a fall, I'm fed up(main thread), I'm drowning, Tips for Shmiras Einayim.

Re: Subconscious falls 16 Jul 2025 15:31 #439012

  • goldwings
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Thank you for asking the question many of us have [ at least I do].
I usually don't fall on Shabbos but I had many on Sunday, because Shabbos set the tone.

I think it's the boredom, mixed with streets full of attractive women and some other things (maybe chulent).

About exercise I was thinking of asking if your allowed to do it on Shabbos, I would be glad to hear if anyone knows (although for me it would be quite hard, as my wife doesn't know about my struggle, so I can only do it when she's not around)    
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