Forum

Welcome, Guest

Holy In Jerusalem

(0 viewing)

Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

Reply Topic

New Topic

Page:
1
...
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28

TOPIC: Holy In Jerusalem 14615 Views

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 06 Feb 2025 09:28 #430861

Muttel
Current streak: 290 days
OFFLINE
Gold Boarder
Posts: 593
Karma: 26

stopsurvivingstartliving wrote on 04 Feb 2025 23:26:

13 days to masturbation Clean!

2 days to porn Clean!

I got myself erect (is that a word?) in the shower but with Gods help I was able to stop there.

Just wanted to share a conversation I had with a fellow GYE'er:
GYE'er: So what do you like to do for hobbies?
SSSL: sexual pleasure
SSSL: i kind of had points chol hamoed that i wanted to do nothing other than delve into sexual pleasure

Oh so painful!

SSSL,
276 days ago I would’ve answered precisely how you did, if I was being honest. I’ve come to peace with the fact that I was in that mode of existence, and know that it’s possible to get out. Making peace with ourselves, our frailties, our urges, our desires, and our falls, is key to getting clean….

We're in this struggle together; feel free to reach out!
Muttel15@gmail.com

Feel free to call/text! (908) 251-9590 (google)

Check out my thread here: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/413043-My-ENTIRE-story#413043

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 07 Feb 2025 01:42 #430929

stopsurvivingstartliving OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 429 Karma: 28	15 days to masturbation Clean! 4 days to porn Clean!
	SSSL's Story (Google Doc) [You will need to request permission, which I'm happy to give.] Holy In Jerusalem (My Thread) Feel free to say hi or send some chizuk over @ stopsurvivingstartliving2024@gmail.com. My google voice number got shut down, so I won't be able to receive or send messages from there.

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 09 Feb 2025 00:20 #430992

stopsurvivingstartliving OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 429 Karma: 28	17 Days clean to masturbation! 6 days Clean to porn! #TYH
	SSSL's Story (Google Doc) [You will need to request permission, which I'm happy to give.] Holy In Jerusalem (My Thread) Feel free to say hi or send some chizuk over @ stopsurvivingstartliving2024@gmail.com. My google voice number got shut down, so I won't be able to receive or send messages from there.

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 09 Feb 2025 18:39 #431024

simchastorah
Current streak: 112 days
NOW ONLINE
Gold Boarder
Posts: 458
Karma: 18

That's freakin heroic frankly

To explain what I see as the heroism - when you fall to p* you lose your 'streak', and you don't feel clean. So if your staying clean is about a streak or a clean feeling, you throw up your hands and say 'oh what the heck.' To stay clean even when you have 'lost your streak' etc and say 'hey maybe i fell in this one thing but that doesn't mean i have to fall in the other' means you are sechel motivated, and that is the bottom line of everything good.

Last Edit: 09 Feb 2025 18:52 by simchastorah.

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 11 Feb 2025 01:12 #431106

stopsurvivingstartliving
OFFLINE
Gold Boarder
Posts: 429
Karma: 28

19 days Clean to masturbation!

8 days Clean to porn!

TBH I am watching this series on youtube that is totally "kosher" the problem is they have to stick in some romantic scenes in there, which I can't say it doesn't turn me on. So besides the hours spent on it which doesn't come with a good feeling I have this problem as well. I am not ready to stop watching these but I wanted to put it out there.

Something I am discovering lately is, at the moment my goal when I wake up is to survive the day. Anything I can do to avoid facing real life and it's challenges I pursue. Something that can take my mind away from thinking. Hence my hours of screentime.

What's the eitza, you ask? I am working to get there, but at the moment these are how my days play out. So if you ask how's life, there is two honest answers. Day to day, amazing, who doesn't enjoy hours of youtube. Overall, looking at the big picture, life sucks.

Sorry for the rant guys I just wanted to put this out there,
stopSURVIVINGstartliving

SSSL's Story (Google Doc) [You will need to request permission, which I'm happy to give.]
Holy In Jerusalem (My Thread)

Feel free to say hi or send some chizuk over @ stopsurvivingstartliving2024@gmail.com.
My google voice number got shut down, so I won't be able to receive or send messages from there.

Last Edit: 12 Feb 2025 01:07 by stopsurvivingstartliving.

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 11 Feb 2025 05:25 #431125

lamaazavtuni Current streak: 2 days OFFLINE Expert Boarder Posts: 147 Karma: 4	I reiterate my old offer....
	Feel free to call me 7325230152[google voice]

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 11 Feb 2025 06:51 #431138

azivashacheit101
Current streak: 24 days
OFFLINE
Junior Boarder
Posts: 32
Karma: 2

Hi I'm a bocher in a Yeshiva in Yerushalaim, I recently met with a Rebbi from an American Yeshivah here. He was extreamly helpful, proffesional and non-judgemental. He really knows what he is doing and fully assesed my situationand gave me much needed hadrachah. I suggest that you meet with him or at least speak to him on the phone. Feel free to email me baalteshuvawithazivashacheit@gmail.com and I will send you his name and phone number. Keep up the great and difficult work an keep in mind that you are a good and special person!

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 11 Feb 2025 16:55 #431172

amevakesh
Current streak: 578 days
OFFLINE
Gold Boarder
Posts: 315
Karma: 31

simchastorah wrote on 09 Feb 2025 18:39:

Compound this, by the fact that you're not in a situation that you're happy with. SSSL you are מחייב all of us that find ourselves in challenging life circumstances to keep on fighting no matter what. לפום צערה אגרא! Hashem sees the struggle.

Feel free to email me at amevakesh23@gmail.com

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 12 Feb 2025 01:03 #431204

stopsurvivingstartliving
OFFLINE
Gold Boarder
Posts: 429
Karma: 28

20 days Clean to masturbation!

9 days Clean to porn!

Anyone out there who hasn't have the courage (which is totally understandable) to make a phone call yet I highly recommend you join a vaad. You do not have to talk at all besides announcing your username or any name you use every week. It might be a good way to hear other real people out there struggle and may make it easier for you to open up to other people (whether on the vaad or in private).

Good Night,
SURVIVING

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 12 Feb 2025 23:16 #431271

stopsurvivingstartliving
OFFLINE
Gold Boarder
Posts: 429
Karma: 28

10 days Clean to porn!

Unfortunately I masturbated in the shower. Facts are I should not let it pull me down. Besides that it does no gain, I think the amount of "wins" I had since my last fall I should throw a party. Today I had a really stressful thing that I had to deal with. I tried staying come. Then I numbed with some youtube. I thought I got rid of the "feeling". I go into the shower get an urge and a few minutes later...

It's really amazing that most times I fall it was a split second decision after getting the urge that makes me fall. Once I give in and "start" it really is murderous to get out and it's a usually a lost case by then.

I am not sure my fall was a direct hit from the stress today. When I got into the shower I felt calmed down. So either I justified it by blaming it on my stress or it was still in my subconscious. Either one I did the wrong thing. Either one I am still a good person.

Good Night Guys!

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 13 Feb 2025 15:36 #431314

jollylemur95
Current streak: 122 days
OFFLINE
Expert Boarder
Posts: 123

stopsurvivingstartliving wrote on 12 Feb 2025 23:16:

10 days Clean to porn!

Unfortunately I masturbated in the shower. Facts are I should not let it pull me down. Besides that it does no gain, I think the amount of "wins" I had since my last fall I should throw a party. Today I had a really stressful thing that I had to deal with. I tried staying come. Then I numbed with some youtube. I thought I got rid of the "feeling". I go into the shower get an urge and a few minutes later...

It's really amazing that most times I fall it was a split second decision after getting the urge that makes me fall. Once I give in and "start" it really is murderous to get out and it's a usually a lost case by then.

I am not sure my fall was a direct hit from the stress today. When I got into the shower I felt calmed down. So either I justified it by blaming it on my stress or it was still in my subconscious. Either one I did the wrong thing. Either one I am still a good person.

Good Night Guys!

I love the attitude! Realizing that something was wrong and taking responsibility for it. But Just as much not letting it define you. I can only say that my impression of you that is that your are not just a good person but an elevated one and a true mevakesh!.

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 14 Feb 2025 01:31 #431342

stopsurvivingstartliving OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 429 Karma: 28	11 days Clean to porn! Day one Clean to masturbation! Thank you @jollylemur95 for the positive feedback, it means a lot to me.
	SSSL's Story (Google Doc) [You will need to request permission, which I'm happy to give.] Holy In Jerusalem (My Thread) Feel free to say hi or send some chizuk over @ stopsurvivingstartliving2024@gmail.com. My google voice number got shut down, so I won't be able to receive or send messages from there.

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 14 Feb 2025 13:31 #431355

stopsurvivingstartliving OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 429 Karma: 28	Heading into Shabbos with 2 Clean days to masturbation and 12 Clean days to porn!
	SSSL's Story (Google Doc) [You will need to request permission, which I'm happy to give.] Holy In Jerusalem (My Thread) Feel free to say hi or send some chizuk over @ stopsurvivingstartliving2024@gmail.com. My google voice number got shut down, so I won't be able to receive or send messages from there.

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 16 Feb 2025 01:08 #431394

stopsurvivingstartliving OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 429 Karma: 28	13 days Clean to porn! 3 days Clean to masturbation!
	SSSL's Story (Google Doc) [You will need to request permission, which I'm happy to give.] Holy In Jerusalem (My Thread) Feel free to say hi or send some chizuk over @ stopsurvivingstartliving2024@gmail.com. My google voice number got shut down, so I won't be able to receive or send messages from there.

Re: Holy In Jerusalem 17 Feb 2025 00:50 #431453

stopsurvivingstartliving OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 429 Karma: 28	Thank God another day clean under my belt. 2 weeks to porn! 4 days to masturbation!
	SSSL's Story (Google Doc) [You will need to request permission, which I'm happy to give.] Holy In Jerusalem (My Thread) Feel free to say hi or send some chizuk over @ stopsurvivingstartliving2024@gmail.com. My google voice number got shut down, so I won't be able to receive or send messages from there.