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Bump in the road
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TOPIC: Bump in the road 168 Views

Bump in the road 20 Mar 2023 13:59 #393565

  • mr.123
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Hi. I’ve been streaking at 22 days then I fell, then 7 days and now a wet dream.
my question is: 
a) technically speaking, does this make my streak go down (because it’s not explicitly porn or masterbation) especially from my understanding there was no negative thoughts that I can remember, defiantly not so that I can remember during the day, or even in the dream Besides for waking up to the feel? 
b) any divrei chizuk one can share privately. Thanks. 

Re: Bump in the road 20 Mar 2023 14:45 #393566

  • davidt
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Mr.123 wrote on 20 Mar 2023 13:59:
Hi. I’ve been streaking at 22 days then I fell, then 7 days and now a wet dream.
my question is: 
a) technically speaking, does this make my streak go down (because it’s not explicitly porn or masterbation) especially from my understanding there was no negative thoughts that I can remember, defiantly not so that I can remember during the day, or even in the dream Besides for waking up to the feel? 
b) any divrei chizuk one can share privately. Thanks. 

First of all congratulations on your amazing clean streaks! Keep it up and keep on sharing such great news.

A wet dream is NOT considered a fall, it's to be expected and normal, due to the subconscious mind's "thirst" for this pleasure that one has B"H stopped providing it with. If one is not lusting during the day, and doing what it takes to stay clean, and even so has a wet dream, he should not worry one bit. In fact he can congratulate himself that his subconscious has "realized" that he stopped these bad behaviors. The good news is that eventually, the wet dreams subside.

Sometimes an unprovoked wet dream is a good sign. Your subconscious mind is getting the message that consciously you are not doing this stuff any more. Yes, it may be unpleasant, but the good news is that eventually they recede too as you rewire your brain.  
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com

Re: Bump in the road 20 Mar 2023 14:59 #393567

  • monseyyid41
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Everything DavidT said is correct. I just want to add one point. Rashi in Chumash (on the Passuk כחי וראשית אוני) says that Reuven (Yaakov's Bechor) came from the first seed of Yaakov. This is because - שלא ראה קרי מימיו - Yaakov never saw anything come out of his body until then. It seems like this is something so unusual that it is described as a praise for someone on the level of Yaakov Avinu. This means that for everyone else (even big Tzaddikim) it is to be expected to sometimes have a "wet dream". This is especially true if you can't remember having bad thoughts prior to the incident. So, please don't let this throw you off at all. Keep going and stay strong! We're all here for you.
My thread: Forum (guardyoureyes.com)
We are not all in the same boat, but we are all in the same lake. And when one boat is in trouble, the other boats in the lake can quickly come to his aid. Feel free to reach out to me to give some chizuk or to receive some. monseyyid41@gmail.com

Re: Bump in the road 20 Mar 2023 16:19 #393571

  • chancy
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Good point Monsey yid, 
Ill add another point, Yakov Avinu is not named Yakov Hatzaddik, you know who is? Yosef Hatzaddik! Yosef who struggled like heck alone in Mitzrayim! Yosef who almost gave in according to the g'mara, he was ready to do what Potifor's wife wanted finally!  but he caught himself in the last second but it was too late and he let out 10 drops of zera but he didnt fall with a goyta!!! Im not saying that we understand exactly what this means, but thats what the g'mara says and therefore we allowed to repeat it and learn a lesson from this.
And he is named Yosef Hatzaddik!!! He is the looked upon as the symbol of wining this battle, with his kedusha he caused that yiden for the next 210 years stayed away from the goyta's! Can we understand and appreciate this? 
A tzaddik is not someone who is completely  clean since birth, those are only a few people in the world that come down here to help the rest of us. For the rest of us the job is to stay above the waters and not give in and let ourselves be drowned. Just keep on coming up again and again for air and keep swimming until we reach that safe shore.

ps. im afraid to write this lest someone either think they really understand Yosef Hatzaddik or think that i am degrading him cv! 
And im also afraid that someone will think that its not to bad as long as you dont sin with a goyta, CV!! 
I just hope that someone will learn the lesson that im trying to give here.

Re: Bump in the road 20 Mar 2023 16:28 #393572

  • grant400
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Definitely not a fall! To the contrary, it shows that your body isn't getting the releases you were giving it till now.

Re: Bump in the road 20 Mar 2023 17:10 #393575

  • monseyyid41
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chancy wrote on 20 Mar 2023 16:19:
Good point Monsey yid, 
Ill add another point, Yakov Avinu is not named Yakov Hatzaddik, you know who is? Yosef Hatzaddik! Yosef who struggled like heck alone in Mitzrayim! Yosef who almost gave in according to the g'mara, he was ready to do what Potifor's wife wanted finally!  but he caught himself in the last second but it was too late and he let out 10 drops of zera but he didnt fall with a goyta!!! Im not saying that we understand exactly what this means, but thats what the g'mara says and therefore we allowed to repeat it and learn a lesson from this.
And he is named Yosef Hatzaddik!!! He is the looked upon as the symbol of wining this battle, with his kedusha he caused that yiden for the next 210 years stayed away from the goyta's! Can we understand and appreciate this? 
A tzaddik is not someone who is completely  clean since birth, those are only a few people in the world that come down here to help the rest of us. For the rest of us the job is to stay above the waters and not give in and let ourselves be drowned. Just keep on coming up again and again for air and keep swimming until we reach that safe shore.

ps. im afraid to write this lest someone either think they really understand Yosef Hatzaddik or think that i am degrading him cv! 
And im also afraid that someone will think that its not to bad as long as you dont sin with a goyta, CV!! 
I just hope that someone will learn the lesson that im trying to give here.

Chancy, no need to be afraid. Your point was clear and well-made. I think we all understood your intention.
My thread: Forum (guardyoureyes.com)
We are not all in the same boat, but we are all in the same lake. And when one boat is in trouble, the other boats in the lake can quickly come to his aid. Feel free to reach out to me to give some chizuk or to receive some. monseyyid41@gmail.com
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