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OivedElokim-I’ll never give up
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 6088 Views

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 28 Jul 2021 12:17 #371267

  • DavidT
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OivedElokim wrote on 28 Jul 2021 04:48:
Been falling a lot over the last two days. 

I don’t have a concrete staying clean plan for staying clean. Nonetheless I am determined to remain clean for the next 24 hours. I cannot say no today for tomorrow, but I can say no today for today. ODAAT. I don’t know if I’ll see success long term, but that’s not my concern right now.

You don't need to worry about a plan that will keep you clean next year. If you'll say NO today, then afterwards stop thinking about it... you've won!
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 28 Jul 2021 13:12 #371269

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DavidT wrote on 28 Jul 2021 12:17:

OivedElokim wrote on 28 Jul 2021 04:48:
Been falling a lot over the last two days. 

I don’t have a concrete staying clean plan for staying clean. Nonetheless I am determined to remain clean for the next 24 hours. I cannot say no today for tomorrow, but I can say no today for today. ODAAT. I don’t know if I’ll see success long term, but that’s not my concern right now.

You don't need to worry about a plan that will keep you clean next year. If you'll say NO today, then afterwards stop thinking about it... you've won!

Sometimes it's hard to make a concrete plan. To know exactly how and what to change can be difficult, and to accurately predict what will be in the future is even harder. And regarding effort, surely it's best to focus just on today, instead of trying to do the impossible task of "being clean 90 days all today," which just overwhelmes us.

But at the same time it's important to do things that will put us in a better position in the future.

To use an example I learned from chess: I read a book that explained that a lot of the moves we do in the beginning of the game are not done with a calculation of exactly what moves will happen afterward and the exact position we will be in later on. They are made because we know the general idea that it's good to have this piece in this spot. That it probably will be beneficial later on in the game even though we don't know exactly how.

I think it's the same thing here. Our efforts are limited to today, and our immediate goals and objectives our focus on today. But even though we are not planning exactly what to do down the road, it's important to do things that seem that will probably somehow be beneficial later on. We didn't make a direct action, and perhaps our plan does not focus at all on what we will do tomorrow. Our efforts and thoughts are all about today. But we do also need to add things that we might not know how exactly but it makes sense that they would strengthen us at some point down the road.

That's why it's good to add something like reading a book or listening to something motivational every day. We're not trying to fight tomorrow's fights today. But we are trying to make an imprint in ourselves or invest in ourselves today, without any knowledge of how exactly it will help us. We might not see any change in ourselves. But something small is happening. And everything adds up.

And you never know, maybe as a result result tomorrow's  battle will be easier. Or maybe it won't. Maybe a different day's battle will be easier. But we know vaguely that we are somehow putting ourselves in a better position. I think that's something that's important for us to do everyday.

(The resources I like are in my signature. But pick the ones that YOU like, which is more important.)
In the place where ba’alei teshuva stand, even pure tzaddikim who never sinned cannot stand. (Rabbi Avohu, Brachos 34b)

Great free resources:
My favorite book for breaking free: The Battle of the Generation 
https://guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation. Change your attitude and change your life!

Rabbi Shafier's incredible lectures on breaking free: The Fight. Download here: 
https://theshmuz.com/series/the-fight/

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 28 Jul 2021 14:13 #371274

  • Striving Avreich
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Do you have a mentor? Someone to talk to?

I find it important to get out of my head when I feel overcome by lust (actually when the build up starts).

I can give you my number if you'd like

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 29 Jul 2021 04:52 #371282

  • OivedElokim
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Please do
For the background to my name- see Tanya פרק טו.
״שההפרש בין עובד אלוקים לצדיק הוא שעובד הוא לשון הווה, שהוא באמצע העבודה״
-Oived Elokim means a constant work in progress...
“Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future”.

My old thread

My current thread 

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 03 Aug 2021 22:02 #371402

  • OivedElokim
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So I have come to realize that I need to stop
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
For the background to my name- see Tanya פרק טו.
״שההפרש בין עובד אלוקים לצדיק הוא שעובד הוא לשון הווה, שהוא באמצע העבודה״
-Oived Elokim means a constant work in progress...
“Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future”.

My old thread

My current thread 

Last Edit: 03 Aug 2021 22:05 by OivedElokim.

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 06 Aug 2021 05:43 #371476

  • OivedElokim
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Day 2
For the background to my name- see Tanya פרק טו.
״שההפרש בין עובד אלוקים לצדיק הוא שעובד הוא לשון הווה, שהוא באמצע העבודה״
-Oived Elokim means a constant work in progress...
“Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future”.

My old thread

My current thread 

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 09 Aug 2021 22:01 #371529

  • OivedElokim
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Day 5



Spending the week with family. minimal access to unfiltered devices, BH
For the background to my name- see Tanya פרק טו.
״שההפרש בין עובד אלוקים לצדיק הוא שעובד הוא לשון הווה, שהוא באמצע העבודה״
-Oived Elokim means a constant work in progress...
“Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future”.

My old thread

My current thread 

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 11 Aug 2021 21:59 #371557

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Day 7

Been having a pretty easy time although I struggled a bit with an urge to masturbate a few nights ago. Over all the lesson is that cutting unsupervised or unfiltered devices out of my life is the best strategy. I think I may need to buy myself a laptop and install a filter so that I never have an excuse to use unfiltered devices. Gotta start saving up…
For the background to my name- see Tanya פרק טו.
״שההפרש בין עובד אלוקים לצדיק הוא שעובד הוא לשון הווה, שהוא באמצע העבודה״
-Oived Elokim means a constant work in progress...
“Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future”.

My old thread

My current thread 

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 13 Aug 2021 02:19 #371573

  • OivedElokim
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Day 9

Had a very vivid sexual dream last night and woke up very aroused. Really wanted to “follow through” but I found the strength within me to say no.  So I’m still clean, BH.
For the background to my name- see Tanya פרק טו.
״שההפרש בין עובד אלוקים לצדיק הוא שעובד הוא לשון הווה, שהוא באמצע העבודה״
-Oived Elokim means a constant work in progress...
“Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future”.

My old thread

My current thread 

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 13 Aug 2021 02:32 #371575

  • dovidfg
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OivedElokim wrote on 13 Aug 2021 02:19:
Day 9

Had a very vivid sexual dream last night and woke up very aroused. Really wanted to “follow through” but I found the strength within me to say no.  So I’m still clean, BH.

Please send me a link to the strength within

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 15 Aug 2021 03:13 #371603

  • OivedElokim
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Day 11

Clean
For the background to my name- see Tanya פרק טו.
״שההפרש בין עובד אלוקים לצדיק הוא שעובד הוא לשון הווה, שהוא באמצע העבודה״
-Oived Elokim means a constant work in progress...
“Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future”.

My old thread

My current thread 

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 16 Aug 2021 01:24 #371634

  • YeshivaGuy
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You are amazing man. Simply amazing

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 16 Aug 2021 05:13 #371642

  • OivedElokim
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Day 12

Was using my mother’s phone for something today. I was about to give it back and then I started thinking to maybe “utilize” the opportunity for some borderline stuff. Thankfully it remained in the realm of thought…

Starting yeshiva this week. Hoping it all works out. Very grateful to G-d for almost two weeks clean. I hope this momentum will carry me forward to many clean day.
For the background to my name- see Tanya פרק טו.
״שההפרש בין עובד אלוקים לצדיק הוא שעובד הוא לשון הווה, שהוא באמצע העבודה״
-Oived Elokim means a constant work in progress...
“Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future”.

My old thread

My current thread 

Last Edit: 16 Aug 2021 05:15 by OivedElokim.

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 16 Aug 2021 12:39 #371649

  • YeshivaGuy
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OivedElokim wrote on 16 Aug 2021 05:13:
Day 12

Was using my mother’s phone for something today. I was about to give it back and then I started thinking to maybe “utilize” the opportunity for some borderline stuff. Thankfully it remained in the realm of thought…

Starting yeshiva this week. Hoping it all works out. Very grateful to G-d for almost two weeks clean. I hope this momentum will carry me forward to many clean day.

Wow! I’ve been in the exact same situation before, and know how hard it is to win that battle.
Very impressive.
Hatzlocha in Yeshiva!
Last Edit: 16 Aug 2021 12:40 by YeshivaGuy.

Re: OivedElokim-I’ll never give up 17 Aug 2021 20:10 #371698

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Keep it up tzaddik. Each time you resist temptation for what appears to be so readily available and enticing, strengthens your "NO" muscle for future nisyonos.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE
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