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My first bein hazmanim clean
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: My first bein hazmanim clean 2832 Views

Re: My first bein hazmanim clean 11 Oct 2019 05:30 #344156

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Please realize that day 91 can be a challenge. Many guys get there and say "Now what?!" "When does this end?" WE have to realize that the challenge is here for life. However the rules have change. In the past it appeared I had no bechira to choose. Now however it is evident that I can iyh stay clean. So mazel tov on 90 and make sure to celebrate! And don't panic when the next tidal wave comes ……..
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE

Re: My first bein hazmanim clean 13 Oct 2019 01:41 #344172

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The thing that I think helped keep me on track the most recently is the realization that I can obviously live without all this lusting like I've done for the past three months as you pointed out-Hashemhelpme.            
That being said I am having a bit of a struggle now. I don't think I'm holding by acting out as of now but I'm having a lot of attacks of flashbacks to things I've seen and it's creating a strong urge... Coupled with the added stress of erev Yom tov and bein haZmanim I'm nervous I may not last. The past two years after 40+ days clean from elul through Yom Kippur I fell sometime during succos. This was boruch Hashem I have over 90 day streak but I must be extremely vigilant bc now is a vey dangerous time. As always I would appreciate any tips or feedback.  

Re: My first bein hazmanim clean 13 Oct 2019 03:22 #344175

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היסח הדעת, don't dwell on it
use the mind to think of something else and better yet thoughts of torah Torah (my understanding of a letter from the Lubavitcher Rebbe)

Re: My first bein hazmanim clean 13 Oct 2019 03:45 #344178

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@Tzvi5 easier said than done but I'm trying. It keeps coming back though. I get rid of it for a few hours but it eventually comes back. It's bothering me a lot more often now than over the past few months, though there were rough patches then also.
Last Edit: 13 Oct 2019 03:47 by Street.

Re: My first bein hazmanim clean 13 Oct 2019 03:48 #344179

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It's a lot easier if your mind is already filled with torah.

Re: My first bein hazmanim clean 13 Oct 2019 18:03 #344190

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NNot much time to post but I just want to write out my kabalos for the next two days to give myself the added mechayiv. I will bli neder: 1 say the Yom of the the day of the week in tehilim.  2 learn 1 daf gemara with rashi  3 will not go in to certain area of my house unless directed to and I can't get out of it.        
I hope to report back on chol hamoed and to make renew for the rest of bein hazmanim. Wishing a good and clean Yom tov to all.

Re: My first bein hazmanim clean 08 Nov 2019 04:10 #344998

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The good news first or the bad... Boruch Hashem I made it to day 96. Boruch Hashem I fell on day 97 and day 98 and day 99 boruch Hashem since then I've been clean. It was definitely easier the first time but I hope that I'm stronger after this fall so it will have at least accomplished something good. I have to thank all GYE members for helping me get to 96 clean and its only thanks to you that I managed to get back on track after "only" 3 days I can't remember a fall ever being this short before.    

Re: My first bein hazmanim clean 11 Nov 2019 01:17 #345047

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Your post shows a healthy mind BH. Firstly, you showed staying clean for an extended period of time is possible, something that so many of us simply did not believe. Secondly, your fall did not cause yi'ush. You got back up and b'ezras Hashem are continuing. Thirdly, instead of hiding, you shared the fall with the oilam here, recognizing that honesty coupled with support from a chevra are two major ingredients in getting iyh completely out of this mess.
Feel free to contact me at michelgelner@gmail.com

My threads: Lessons Learned: guardyoureyes.com/forum/20-Important-Threads/335248-Lessons-Learned

                    My Story and G-d Bless GYE: guardyoureyes.com/forum/17-Balei-Battims-Forum/303036-My-story-and-G-d-bless-GYE
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