Feeling your pain..... Not knowing "what's next" is one of the hardest things for a human to handle...
But hold on to G-d, Sci. Life is a roller-coaster, but G-d is your body harness. Stay strapped in and no matter what the roller-coaster does, you'll be safe. Scream at the top of your lungs if you have to, but enjoy the ride just the same! After all, you're strapped in tight. Put your complete trust in the designers of the ride. They made it safe. They made it for your benefit. And you'll come out with a smile
Sci, these words of Guard's are so deep. I've used this idea from him many times, and it always helps me keep my sanity. I may not keep my lunch, but you can't have everything when you're on the ride of your liife!