Day 23: Trying to apply what I've been learning from "how to be happy no matter what". Started rereading the book as well. Did some volunteer work.

full steam ahead!!! Shkoyach for the volunteer work

Keep it up!

Day 24: In this book I've been reading the author claims that the natural state of the mind is one of contentment. It's only our negative thoughts that disrupt it. There's alot of truth to that but it's no panacea. I've found that if you do nothing you'll still be miserable. Life demands to be filled it has no place for void. (Funny sentence). 

Day 25: Finished rereading "How To Be Happy No Matter What". I'm a bit conflicted about the book. Some of what he says is great. Some isn't. However overall I gained a tremendous amount. 

Stuff I Like: Thinking is an ability not reality. You don't need to treat all your thoughts like front page news. Lack of awareness that you are doing the thinking or that thinking is a voluntary function creates low moods. Much of our experience of life is created by moods rather than the reverse. Feelings are a built in alarm system to tell you when you are thinking dysfunctionally. We are live in separate realities. This understanding allows us to have better relationships. We expect people to see things differently than us. You don't need to follow every train of thought. You probably won't solve your problems from your computer part of your mind. Instead access the content state of mind where you have common sense and wisdom.

Stuff I Hate: He claims there is no situation that is inherently stressful. Everything is neutral, it's how you perceive it. So if you hate your job, that's you seeing it as stressful. So obviously there's some truth to that. Many times in life it's worth thinking this isn't so bad or I don't need to be bothered by that etc. However, he seems to say that everyone is a unformed shapeless blob having no preferences. Isn't there things which (perhaps because our conditioning) we enjoy more than others? Can one not be more suited to playing music than learning Gemara? Obviously it's positive not to get stressed when you need to do something you don't particularly like. Perhaps by reminding yourself there's nothing intrinsically horrible about this activity. However, don't we each have a personality that's highly individual? Don't we thrive doing things to which we are suited? If everything is neutral why should I pick one activity over the other? If you deny that preferences exist you'd be stuck in a state of indecision or cold indifference. 

Ihavenostrength wrote on 07 Mar 2017 21:24:

Either way, just be happy man, no matter what...

Was gonna reply, but haven't read the book and feel I'm not on a level to input.

Day 26: Final conclusion about book: it's great, but you have to use common sense along with his principles. For example, if you are studying and the area is noisy and you can't concentrate, find a different place. If you stick strictly to the book he'd tell you there is nothing frustrating about the situation it's your perception of it. Which is correct, for if you stopped caring that you weren't able to concentrate and hence weren't making progress, you'd relax. However I need to care. If I would not care about being able to concentrate, I would be relaxed. However, I wouldn't end up learning what I need to and I would fail.

Ihavenostrength wrote on 08 Mar 2017 20:03:

I find when I'm at peace with myself, people talking in davening does not bother me at all. When I'm a bit restless, or I've just acted out, my gosh just bring me a shotgun and I'll off those yappers.

Singularity wrote on 09 Mar 2017 13:35:

Totally relate. Holds true for me as well. In this situation though I wasn't annoyed by the talking itself. My brain just works better in a quiet area or at least one where you can't make out distinct sounds (like a beis medrash). I'm learning some complicated stuff and I need to cover a certain amount of material per day which I can't do when it's noisy. 

Definitely could be an element of being self conscious involved too. When learning out loud there's always the chance of sounding stupid if other people are around.

I think low self-esteem and arrogance are 2 sides of the same coin.  Dr. Sorotzkin talks about this.  The lower we feel about ourselves, the more we need to inflate ourselves.  He said the kid with the lowest self-esteem he ever met admitted to thinking of himself as greater than G-d sometimes.

Day 27: "Progress is impossible without change and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything." - George Bernard Shaw 

I think this is very relevant to the topics discussed on this site. 

Day 28: Here's a song from Eli Schwebel called "shabbos takes me home". When I listened to it yesterday it reminded how shabbos is so beautiful.

It made me aware that too often I look at shabbos as boring because of all the things you can't do.

When he sings "I remember who I am on shabbos", it acknowledges that during the week we might be in a place where Shabbos may not look so enticing.

That shouldn't discourage us from enjoying shabbos however. That is the very reason we have shabbos. To remind us of what we've forgotten.

For my part I'm going to try to enjoy the davening. Pay attention to the words a little. 

Turning the wheel again
Walking in circles, so alone
Like a mobius strip
Punching the clock and putting the hammer to the stone
Just to leave it in the end

And it’s never enough
Is this lifting me up
Ease my mind
Feed my soul
Help me come alive
Make me whole…

Shabbos!
I remember who I am on Shabbos
Just like it always was on Shabbos
Oh it feels like I’m alive on Shabbos, Ooh
Shabbos takes me home

Back in it again I’m missing you and this concrete world that feels so cold
No dimension and no feeling
This new day begins
Sometimes it gets so old
But I keep on pushing through

And it’s never enough
Is this lifting me up?
Feed my soul
Ease my mind
Help me come alive
Make me whole

Shabbos!
I remember who I am on Shabbos
Just like it always was on Shabbos
Oh it feels like I’m alive on Shabbos, Ooh

Not a mundane Sunday
Never saw it before like I’m seeing it now
And it’s lifting me up
I’m not giving it up
And it’s a part of me
In this heart I’m free
And I won’t go back
Never fade away again

Day 29: Feeling a little silly writing everyday. I have nothing to write. I made a commitment to write everyday till day 90 come what may. I think it will help me focus. Nice shabbos B"H spent with family. I'm in a better place mentally than I've been in a long time B"H. 

Freilichen Purim! 

Don't feel silly doing something that helps you it doesn't really matter what other think or say if it works do it ( just be honest with yourself 

Great to here that things are getting better 
Continued hatzlacha

A Freilichen Purim