Day 41
Need to develop self motivated thinking - not letting my eyes or ears lead my thoughts but having thoughts flow from within.

This is not easy, but it is a life skill I have to learn.
I pray for siyata dishmaya for all of us in this area

can you explain what thinking flowing from within means?

for me it means asking for siyata dishmaya to, when I want to or need to, choose to think about something and guide my thoughts: through the issue I'm getting myself to think about, the question on the parsha I'm thinking about, the plans I'm thinking about, the shiur I'm preparing for.

as opposed to starting to think just based on what I see (especially problematic triggers)

I've been listening to tapes of 12 step conference calls - that certainly helps

starting to work on anger
this complements work on lust