I've been clean now for about 43 days BH!
But I wanted to get input on the following:

I feel as though that high from the first two weeks or so of sobriety is starting to fade. disgusting images are creeping their way more easily into my head, and without that initial high, I'm finding it harder to push the thoughts away.

I'm so Grateful to have G-d with me in all of this and that I'm able to recognize it, but at the same time, that simcha in the struggle and the overcoming the beast just isn't evident as strongly anymore.

Thank G-d, just by the fact that I haven't fed my yetzer hara any fuel in awhile, his onslaught is a lot more bearable. But I desperately want to make sure I stay on track.

I guess what I'm trying to say here is that I feel that I'm at a point where all the glitz and glamour of staying clean is fading, what do I do now? How do I continue tapping into the simcha of serving G-d in this way? And how do I make this struggle a lifetime victory?

Hi GoldStar,
Welcome. I'm not sure how to make the struggle a lifetime victory. I think you will find that people here don't worry or think about the future. All we can and need deal with is the present. I'm sure others will explain why this is.
Regarding your fading enthusiasm. This is perfectly normal. Rabbi Tatz talks about it. He charts the journey of growth as follows: You have the initial flash that illuminates your way; it inspires you and shows you what you can achieve. Then it becomes dark again - and now it's your turn to stumble through the darkness in the direction you know you must take - to get to the destination you've already tasted.
This journey is the bechina of Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov. Avraham being the initial light, Yitzchak being that dark long journey, and Yakov being when it comes together again - but now it's earned, it's yours and it's all the more real and greater.
Rabbi Tatz notes that money people who don't know this secret think that the initial inspiration is all there is; they chase it and when it fades they move on to something else.
Hatzlacha my friend.
Shlomo

Loved it

Big Rabbi Tatz fan - "Living Inspired"

Keep posting - you are great at it.

Thank you yiraishamayim. I really appreciated that.
S

Thank you for sharing. I relate to what you're talking about. Hatzlcha!

GoldStarN'G,
I've just read your other threads over the place 'cos I wanted to get an idea of where your holding, your challenges etc.
First of all I love your name. A chilled approach to life - not forgetting that you can enjoy life while shteiging. I think Goldstar is a great choice: much better than Heineken say. Why? Cos even the gashmiyus has a connection to kedusha - it's made in EY.
Can I take a leaf out of Cordnoys book and ask you to share with us, after all the years of acting out, what prompted you to turn a new leaf and join GYE? Also, what has carried you through for 30+ days so far?
Finally, can I suggest that you don't start a new thread every time you want to say something new. Of course you're welcome to do so and no one will be bothered but I think it's better for you. Because that way we can read one thread and understand where you come from, what's been your challenges, and where you're holding. I'm not saying to be fanatical about not sharing yourself on other people's threads - but to think twice before starting another new thread of your own. It's only my opinion but if it works for you by all means do what works for you! All he best. Shlomo