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Giving it a go one day at a time

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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

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TOPIC: Giving it a go one day at a time 23952 Views

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 09 Jun 2015 13:57 #256446

ysftw
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TalmidChaim wrote:

You have the right attitude, and as you're realizing, recovery is largely a personal experience we have in the company of a supportive brotherhood. So while we could learn from others, and gather data on what's worked for them, the specifics of your needs will emerge only by pushing through on your journey. Believe me, I'm one of those people who hate non-linear, ambiguous, open-ended, no-right-answer propositions, and recovery is definitively, all of that.

Some basics though: staying busy is good, and keeping out of isolation as much as possible. Also (and this applies very much to me, and maybe you too) avoiding overly-stimulated emotional states, mellowing out, is important. As counter-intuitive as it sounds, this means not letting yourself get all over-inflated with optimism, excitement, etc., which, in the beginning of recovery, is normal, even healthy. So I suggest this last part loosely; if you have a choice between being super-stoked about staying clean, or depressed about all the new deprivation, the former is absolutely preferable!!! However, with every up, unfortunately, comes a down, and we addicts don't do too well with downs. That's why staying in the middle, relaxing, and working on letting-go and letting G-d is paramount.

unbelievable...thanks for this, the first part is true and I will do well to remember it. The second part is a major chiddish. I'd just add this; for me I rarely get super stoked about being clean. I'm assuming like most people I have an automatic routine when I fall which keeps me in a bad place for a while. So I'm always very happy (but not in an overly enthusiastic way) to return to living the kind of life I want to be living.

Update: today again things are going well. Isolation is not just a problem for what we've mentioned but for productivity too. I need to find a way to sort this out and plan my day even better such that I'm never isolated.
That's the next step.
Just one more day!

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 09 Jun 2015 14:33 #256453

hwhap@gmx.com OFFLINE Senior Boarder Posts: 66 Karma: 1	ysftw wrote: Just one more day! Have a good day! I wonder if this is what the mishna means when it says "repent one day before your death." Maybe it's talking about the 12-step principle of one day at a time.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 09 Jun 2015 16:43 #256471

TalmidChaim
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Yeah, I've been saying to myself, "Not today," lately, whereas I used to focus on the big picture. It's a different kind of thinking for me, and maybe it's what I needed along. But I'm finding a lot of power in the "Not today" attitude.

As for the keeping optimism in check discussion, I always debate whether I should bring that up in the first place. It's a personal issue, and may or may not apply to some people. And I would hate to take away from someone's well earned simcha, especially with regard to sobriety. So take it with a grain of salt. Like I always say, this is all just data on what works for other people. The real solutions have to come from you.

0% Tolerance and 100% Self-Forgiveness.

Lo ba-shamayim hi

Mellow out.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 10 Jun 2015 16:53 #256549

ysftw OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 160 Karma: 8	again things are good again just one more day as it has been said it seems more and more obvious that this is something I need to figure out properly myself. For me at the moment my biggest challenge is getting enough sleep which is crucial to my willpower. That's what i'll be working on for the next few days

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 10 Jun 2015 16:55 #256550

pischoshelmachat OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 492 Karma: 42	ysftw wrote: again things are good again just one more day as it has been said it seems more and more obvious that this is something I need to figure out properly myself. For me at the moment my biggest challenge is getting enough sleep which is crucial to my willpower. That's what i'll be working on for the next few days If I am tired, I am toast.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 10 Jun 2015 18:44 #256558

serenity
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"ONE DAY AT A TIME"
Posts: 1796
Karma: 173

Sleep is essential for my sobriety and my sobriety is essential for my sleep.

Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 11 Jun 2015 23:11 #256681

ysftw OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 160 Karma: 8	Sleeps a massive one, and I'm not going to get enough sleep tonight! Really somehing I need to work harder on. Back to 7 days though and going to pop to the mikveh pre shabbas, a great way to go into the day pure. Really hope I get a lot of sleep over shabbat!

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 12 Jun 2015 17:42 #256742

ysftw OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 160 Karma: 8	shabbat shalom lekulam I slipped two weeks ago on shabbat without enough sleep, and feeling ill. Thus for tonight and on I'm starting a regular sleep pattern and also working on always having some coins on me for tzedakah (after os shabbos of course) hatzlocho!

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 13 Jun 2015 23:48 #256762

ysftw OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 160 Karma: 8	still clean! now just need to get to bed ;S

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 14 Jun 2015 23:22 #256838

ysftw OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 160 Karma: 8	sleep still not going so well whilst i still can i should be getting 8 hours a night. at the moment I count myself lucky with 7. this has to change. one more successful day funny how every week there's a new challenge. I guess things wouldn't be interesting otherwise

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 15 Jun 2015 18:20 #256889

ysftw OFFLINE Gold Boarder Posts: 160 Karma: 8	All going really well...so happy at the moment. Again need to work on my sleeping and perhaps now more than ever watch out for the yetzer. And cram ever more into my days. Hope everyone is doing well!

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 15 Jun 2015 19:51 #256897

pischoshelmachat OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 492 Karma: 42	Hi, I am so glad you are feeling well! Get your sleep and stay strong!

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 18 Jun 2015 15:46 #257132

ysftw
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Still clean! Even though I haven't been living up to the idea of posting everyday I'm still going fairly strong at the moment. And it's been 2 weeks (which is weird because I feel like it's only a few days since I last slipped up).
Really there's a few things I've realised which are going to keep me going.
1. When it gets hard realise that I only have to get to the end of the day
2. Spend none of the day in isolation (this is crucial for productivity too)
3. Put in proper effort for tefillah. take my time. focus. Really ask for things.
4. sleep 7 30-8 hours a night
5. no exactly what I want to achieve in my days and weeks

at the moment all these things are happening. and i will try and spot if they stop happening as this could be a bad indicator.
anyway hatzlochah to all...until tomorrow!

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 18 Jun 2015 22:55 #257171

serenity
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"ONE DAY AT A TIME"
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Nice work.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 19 Jun 2015 14:16 #257208

ysftw
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serenity congrats on the 90 day challenge!
Kol Hakavod!

Again still going strong.
Again perhaps I should do more against being in isolation though.
The other thing is a polemic against the power of inspiration. Usually to change it's not enough to ride the wave of enthusiasm, instead one must rewire and readjust and work out how to move forward.
On that point shabbat will be a great time for me, beezrat hashem, to do a cheshbon hanefesh in this area and others.
I pray this shabbat is uplifting for us all!