didn't understand your reason for fallin', but the truth probably is that you fell for the same reasons you have fallen before; and I don't know you, but probably close to the same reasons I/we have fallen in the past.
What is important to realize is that life is full of obstacles.
there will be all sorts of @#$% thrown at us.
We gotta learn how to duck.
We need to learn how to ignore, shovel, clear away, pray, etc.
Layin' the blame for each fall on one thing or the other ain't gonna help us much; not you; not me; not most of us.
b'hatzlachah