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TOPIC: Need an advice 1069 Views

Need an advice 02 Jun 2014 21:59 #232847

  • aaron73
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Hello friends!

I've managed to reach 18 days clean of pornography! ... But just had a fail again and also I haven't been able to leave drugs I know it isn't something good but It kind of keeps away the anxiety caused by pornography...

I'm willing to ask for some help, perhaps a rehab treatment or something, but it means that I have to tell it to people, like my family, and I know they're gonna get mad, and everything may come to change for me, in so many ways, but I'll get the help...In the other hand, I can keep trying on my own, wich is a risky way, but at least I won't have a lot of people mad at me

I'll appreciate some advice guys, I really don't know what to do, I'm afraid and confused.... you are always helpful for me

PEACE!
Last Edit: 02 Jun 2014 22:00 by aaron73.

Re: Need an advice 02 Jun 2014 22:13 #232849

I can't say that I have much experience with drugs, so I don't know how everything fits in to this advice, but personally if it were me and I felt like my life and happiness were dependent on me going to rehab, I think I would do it, no matter who got mad at me.

Not that this is the same, but when I was single, I told my parents that I watched pornography, because I felt like the only way I will get better is if I see someone and get some help, and they were my lifeline. Now it's years down the line and I don't regret it.

Re: Need an advice 02 Jun 2014 22:14 #232850

  • MBJ
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Pornography, drugs, alcohol etc, all these things are escapes, ways of hiding. I think that you need to be open and make some changes in your life, because right now things are not going well. Please open up to someone you trust, please get into some therapy or program to address your drug addiction. Maybe along the way you will find an answer to the pornography problem as well, but please don't delay any further and get the help you deserve.
My Story
Only when we make our real lives sweeter than our fantasies will we reap the emotional rewards, the happiness of recovery. - AlexEliezer
Focus on making the right choices as they come up. - Skeptical
When I start to literally accept G-d's Will as guiding my life today, things start to change. - Dov

Re: Need an advice 03 Jun 2014 01:03 #232871

  • cordnoy
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Agree with MBJ, and like we said before: It is crucial to open up, but choose wisely. Think about who will provide the best assistance. Who will you feel comfortable and confident and secure with? Don't jump to conclusions except the one that you need to tell someone.

b'hatzlachah friend
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Re: Need an advice 09 Jun 2014 23:09 #233148

  • DanielTeshuva
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I may be a week late but I agree about finding someone you trust and telling that person. One of the most powerful tools of lust is keeping it a secret. I mean I've been there in the past, and addiction got me struck for years, and because of not daring to tell anyone it could go on. Do what you think that helps best. But trying to fight this all on your own is not at all recommendable. Chance of losing and giving in to lust is way too big then.

Be blessed!

Re: Need an advice 09 Jun 2014 23:58 #233152

  • cordnoy
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Isolation is what got many of us into this mess in the first place.

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
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Re: Need an advice 10 Jun 2014 07:21 #233193

  • cordnoy
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aaron73 wrote:
Hello friends!

I've managed to reach 18 days clean of pornography! ... But just had a fail again and also I haven't been able to leave drugs I know it isn't something good but It kind of keeps away the anxiety caused by pornography...


Just curious.... the drugs keep you away from the anxiety of pornography...does that mean that you do drugs instead of pornography, or did you mean that there is anxiety caused by watchin' porn, and the drugs calm that anxiety?

Either way, you probably need a professional....not me for sure.

Regardin' the gettin' mad part....they might be for a while, but the fact that you opened up to a safe person...askin', pleadin' for help should outweigh their anger in the long run. in many cases, it works that way with a wife and husband...certainly it should with the folks.

b'hatzlachah friend
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.
Last Edit: 10 Jun 2014 07:22 by cordnoy.

Re: Need an advice 10 Jun 2014 18:28 #233242

  • shivisi
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Listen to this lecture!
It's AWESOME!!!!!

www.torahanytime.com/audio/rabbi-zecharia-wallerstein-rosh-hashanah-pathway-out-of-addiction/
Last Edit: 10 Jun 2014 18:29 by shivisi.

Re: Need an advice 12 Jun 2014 02:51 #233392

  • aaron73
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I'm gonna tell my mom everything in a couple minutes :O so if you guys could be praying for me I'd be really thankful... I can't stand being like this anymore I'm kind of losing it...

cordnoy: I thought that I could control with drugs the anxiety that caused watching porn ... but then I started doing drugs instead of porn to fill the space....and lately I have been doing both

Re: Need an advice 12 Jun 2014 06:59 #233401

  • cordnoy
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I davened a bit for you that it should go well with your Mom.

Let us know please.

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.
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